The Four Threats to a Teen's Career Future: #3 Conformity

Many young people allow pressure from others to influence their post-high school plans. Conforming to those external agendas often leads them astray and robs them of their full potential.

In this article, I'll be revealing the three main sources of that pressure and what you can do to help young people resist conformity!

Public Pressure

Public pressure is the first source. It refers to the societal stories that promote certain values and behaviors. I think most of us would agree that "college right away" is the dominant life-after-12th narrative in our culture. It basically says, "You’ll always be better off going to college, so just guess and go if you’re not sure what to do; you'll figure it out once you get there." This is absolute rubbish!!! College as a default path is a terrible choice, especially when we consider the published statistics related to dropout rates, changing majors, delayed graduations, and degrees that never get used.

Peer Pressure

Young people can feel pressured into a particular path after high school because of their peer group. Whether it’s college, a gap year, or the do-nothing option, friends can significantly influence their decisions. Sometimes, the emotional pain of losing friendships and getting left behind can overpower a logical approach to the decision. Other times, this peer pressure has nothing to do with losing relationships and is more associated with the fear of not fitting in with the crowd.

Parent Pressure

The final source of pressure comes from parents, and it can take three forms:

1. Explicit: Parents clearly communicate the career expectations for their children.
2. Implicit: Parents convey their preferences without directly stating them.
3. Unintentional: Parents do not have a specific agenda, but their children mistakenly believe they do.

There's significant fallout when young people conform to plans shaped by the public, peers, or parents instead of pursuing what’s truly best for them.

Besides being robbed of their full potential, they often waste time, money, and effort. A sense of failure is often added to the existing weight of not knowing what to do with their life. I frequently help emerging young adults deal with anxiety, regret, and damaged self-esteem after investing so much in the wrong direction.

How to Help

If you're interested in helping them avoid conformity, remind them of a few things:

1. There is no universal law about what to do after high school. The path and timeline emphasized by our culture are totally made up and only have power because so many people treat them as if they must be followed.
2. Social connections are important, but they will not compensate for the emotional fallout and waste associated with the wrong career path.

If you're a parent, here are two additional things you can remind them of:

1. Remind your kids that you don't have a specific career agenda for them, but you do expect them to thoroughly explore a job of interest and determine if it’s a good fit before committing to a preparation path.
2. Regulalry let them know that you support them taking time to identify a job match as long as they have an intentional plan to figure things out and follow through.

TAKE THE CHALLENGE

Identify one young person you know who could benefit from the abovementioned reminders and take time to remind them about those things.

START A CONVO

Use these prompts to start conversations with the young people in your universe:

1. Do you think most young people feel pressured to conform to a specific post-high school path? If so, which one?
2. Where does that pressure come from?
3. What are ways you think they can resist conformity and do what’s best for them?

ADD YOUR VOICE

I’d love to know how you help young people deal with career-path pressures. Let me know in the comments!

IN THE NEXT ISSUE

In the next issue, I’ll introduce the idea of self-sabotage and explain how false limiting beliefs often prevent young people from reaching their full potential.

Thanks for reading this GHA (Genuine Human Artifact)!

All the best,

Jay

PS > Did you miss the other issues in this series? No worries . . . I got you:

Threat 1: A Misplaced Focus

Threat 2: The Comparison Trap

I’ve spent over three decades working with young people and parents as a mentor and life coach. I started focusing exclusively on career guidance in 2014 after helping my son figure out career direction while he was a junior in high school.

As a next-gen career guide, I help teens and young 20s around the world identify a job fit to gain clarity and confidence about career direction so they’ll reach their full potential and avoid the waste of getting it wrong.

As a speaker, I encourage and equip young people to think differently about their identity, true success, and figuring out where they can be awesome in the world of work.

As an educator, I empower youth advocates and organizations to more effectively help the young people they serve in the area of career guidance

Do you work with teens/young 20s?

You’re my people.

Send a connection request or book a Zoom Chat!

Life After 12th Resources

1. Coaching Programs
2. Talks and Workshops
3. Facebook Support Group for Parents
4. The Four Foundations of Effective Parental Career Guidance (course for parents)
5. Know Before You Go: The Nine Things You Must Know About a Job of Interest to Avoid a Regrettable Choice (book for young people launching this summer)

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