Four Critical Reasons A Man Needs Passion To Resuscitate His Dreams
Karen Bontrager
Founder Crisis to Courage for Men I Podcast | 16-24 | ★ Money & Thought Leader | TBRI Trauma Clinician | LMHCA Therapist | ACC Trauma Coach | No Fear in Love Race President | Coaching | Scholar | Fierce Men’s Advocate
The American Heritage Dictionary defines passion as: “any powerful emotion or appetite, such as love, joy, hatred, anger, or greed,” “boundless enthusiasm,” and “the object of such enthusiasm.”
Why does a man need passion then, to resuscitate his dreams?
Passion feeds a man’s soul because it helps him develop courage. When he views failure merely as a temporary delay to success, it bolsters the energy and resolve he needs to solve even greater problems, which helps him and society at large. With this approach, the guy becomes more courageous, not weaker in harder challenges.
Secondly, having a passion, or purpose gives the fella meaningful and worthwhile ideas to share, which increases his self-esteem and resilience. In “The 16 Reasons Why It Is So Important To Follow Your Dreams,” Joel Brown indicates that having passion is fundamental to living because it makes men givers, instead of being me-centric or selfish, which leads to isolation and other negative repercussions (See link below).
Since having passion is essential to resuscitating your dreams, let’s do a visualization exercise to get your mind moving in a forward direction.
Right now, remember a time when you were a little boy/young man, full of life and possibility. Adults may have tried to deter you from doing something, but you were unstoppable. You set your mind on accomplishing (x) task, and eventually the result was achieved; whether it was conquering the infamous cookie jar, having your parents concede to another fifteen minutes of play, building a tree house with friends, catching that (x) pound fish, getting that special young lady to attend prom/special occasion with you, doing the impossible skateboard trick, or (x).
Weigh in:
- Why do you think passion is necessary for men to resuscitate their dreams?
- What has gotten in the way of your passion?
- Who has supported the passions you have, either in the past, or currently?
- Would you kindly share what rekindled your ‘passonometer’ (my word) again?
- What advice would you give to your younger self about the importance of having/maintaining passion in life?
Sparking passion is critical in the healing of men’s hearts, who have had complex trauma.
In my counseling/coaching work with traumatized men, who have learned to habitually employ anger, isolation, and numbing behaviors as a means of coping, there is a common denominator. Quite simply, they have lost their passion. These broken male clients say that abuse, neglect, or (x) situation made them believe that they were worthless.
Hearing this internal and negative dialog in turn, caused them to seek out substances or other dangerous behaviors. The men also indicated that key adults in their lives never supported, or they belittled the dreams/ambitions these guys had. The lack of nurture prompted them to later adopt, either a passive mindset, or develop an aggressive/bully approach to life.
Four Critical Reasons A Man Needs Passion To Resuscitate His Dreams, with Bonus Tips:
1) A man who lacks passion, does not have the energy, nor focus to accomplish his dreams. (A) If you are in this rut, spend time reviewing what gave you drive before, and determine how you can add these activities back into your current life style.
2) A man with an unhealthy passion, often seeks out novelty in negative behaviors such as: anger, isolation, and numbing behaviors, including, substance use, porn, excessive work, play, or hobbies to mask unresolved emotion and past trauma. His actions eventually lead to greater problems both, internally, and with significant relationships. (B) For those in distress, find a specially-trained trauma counselor or coach, to address your specific mental health needs, related to repeated traumatic episodes.
3) A passionate man understands purpose gives him meaningful things to share with others, instead of focusing only on self. (C) Hence, explore what it could be through research, volunteering, or asking a loved one, friend, or colleague his/her opinion.
4) A man with passion knows challenges present even greater opportunities to solve more complex problems, which is satisfying to him, and fulfills his, as well as others, dreams. (D) In this vein, find men with heroic stories, who were presented with similar obstacles to overcome, which can inspire you to do likewise.
Fellas, realize that resuscitating your passion is fundamental to leading an abundant life, and for avoiding negative behaviors, which use your male energy in a counterproductive way. Rekindling purpose is especially important in the lives of traumatized men, who may have had their dreams squelched at an early age, and were never given the chance to explore the possibilities. Lastly, a man with passion understands that challenges are simply opportunities for growing, which birth the best ideas, worthwhile of sharing.
Thank you for reading.
Your thoughts are very appreciated.
Link to Article: https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/16-reasons-why-its-important-to-follow-your-dreams/
Researcher’s Bio
Karen Bontrager helps 16-24-year-old men, and fellas stuck there due to complex trauma, make permanent shifts in their behavior from merely surviving in life to thriving through transparent coaching/counseling in one-on-one conversations and in group work, and through topic sensitive trauma-informed workshops in a program called, “From Crisis to Courage.” With this ontological approach, I partner with my clients to discover their essence, (aka highest and best self) by powerfully reflecting and listening to them. My clients quickly learn how to generate self-awareness and to voice their own relationship needs in a clear, constructive way by learning key coaching techniques/evidenced based counseling approaches/tools to work past their traumatic events and addictions to move forward. The clients are then equipped to develop healthy relationships with key relationships: parents/siblings/friends, and with intimate dating partners because they have learned how to proactively use their voice.
Operations Leadership | Internet Marketing | Ontological Coach
4 年Amazing Karen Bontrager
?JavaScript | ?? React | ?? NodeJs | ?? MongoDB | ?? MERN Stack Enthusiast | ?? iNeuron Learner
4 年@karen Bontrager Mam, I want to to add some lines -----“Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.” “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” And Be Always Honest about your work.. It will give you 99.9% Result in positive way.. So passion is so important thing to resuscitate our dreams.. "FINALLY I SAY THAT I AM INSPIRED FROM THIS POST AND I WILL START POSTING ON LINKEDIN AS SOON AS POSSIBLE "??
Founder Crisis to Courage for Men I Podcast | 16-24 | ★ Money & Thought Leader | TBRI Trauma Clinician | LMHCA Therapist | ACC Trauma Coach | No Fear in Love Race President | Coaching | Scholar | Fierce Men’s Advocate
4 年I was taught that young men and older fellas are often callous, and they do not express their feelings or emotions. Ever since, I first started coaching, and then doing therapy with both, the rich and those economically disadvantaged fellas, this has not been at all my experience. On LI, I have also met some of the kindest, generous, and transparent men from various backgrounds, and from all around the world, so thank you for being wonderful YOU. Initially, when I tagged you fellas for the first time to ask your opinion, I expected a couple of lines at best, (kinda like, I tag you, you tag me). In stark contrast, I received pages upon pages from you sharing your most intimate struggles and deepest thoughts, which was completely unexpected. Truly, the transparent discourse made me realize that there needs to be such a space, where fellas can talk about the things that matter, with reverence and honor. Despite this thread being public, I appreciate that all of you have made it that way. The robust discussion has become an invaluable resource of honest dialogue and unconditional regard, for self and one another.
Consultant
4 年Hi Karen. I just love the opening question: "Why does a man need passion then, to resuscitate his dreams?" There's so much juts in this line, that it would be very hard to reach an agreed upon consensus around a table filled with even the wises of the wise. In my own experience, we create a lot of problems for other people during the diagnosis and treatment stages of recovery, and especially in the process of dealing with, and resolving/overcoming trauma (men and women). I can confidently speak about my own childhood trauma and say that it was a MASSIVE DEAL for me because of what I thought other people would say and think, if they found out what I had gone through. If we put 10 plasters on one scrape, it's going to have according psychological & emotional processing outcomes. When I re-visited these memories and the emotions that go with my childhood trauma as an adult, I realised that more than half the trauma I was carrying, belonged to the people who told me how horrible the experiences I went through were...and I carried that sh.t for years! Does everyone have a passion? OR can everyone be passionate about something? Are these two questions the same? And that's not even talking about dreams yet... ;-)
Not your traditional LinkedIn Mental Health Advocate. Cycliste Extraordinaire
4 年Thanks Karen! 1. I have no idea ?? 2. Life...both good (which shifts focus away from passion) and bad things are always trying to steal our passion. 3. I’ve been fortunate enough to have been supported in pretty much anything I wanted to get into. 4. Most times it is just a shift in mindset for me. Something shifts mentally and my passion for something follows. It’s important to remember that what we think are passions and what really are passions aren’t always the same. I may start to get into golf, which comes at a cost (both time and money). However, I may discover that while I thought I was passionate about golfing, 12 months later my interest drops off.