Fostering Transparency & Authenticity

I’m currently wrapping up my 300 hour Yoga Certification at the end of September. I started my yoga teaching journey at YogaSport Dallas in March of 2015. It has been a very rewarding part of my life and it has surprised me in how I have transformed and most importantly expressed what is inherently me, true, real and authentic.

In my career, I am a marketer. A typical day consists of meetings, putting together presentations, strategy development, campaign production, execution, meetings with cross-functional teams, partners and answering emails. When I would teach yoga after work, I typically would have to sprinkle fairy dust of some sort to bring forth yoga-teacher “Renee”. 

When I first started teaching Yoga in Jan 2016, I would say that I was pretty transactional in my delivery, focused on the mechanics of teaching such as knowing the poses, anatomy of poses, transitions and using tools such as breath and props. Transactional isn’t transformational.   

One of the keys in teaching an effective yoga class is employing techniques to modify the energy of the class. Part of the class may require building of energy such as the back bend series while the tail end of the class may be more introspective and quiet. I learned while teaching that I have to draw forth my true, real self into the classes that I teach. Utilize resources, energy, emotion, and perspective from within, not something that is generated outwardly or acquired. I employ both the mechanics and skills as well as the soft-skills of fostering authenticity, transparency and bringing forth truth.

Part of my 300 Hour Certification includes a special project where I will feature leaders within the community who have practiced and demonstrated being a more authentic and transparent leader in their work and life.

This week, I am featuring Natalie Mendez, who is a Leadership Coach at Southwest Airlines and founder of NM Coaching, a Life and Leadership coaching practice. View her LinkedIn Profile to connect and learn more about Natalie.   

1)    Tell me a bit about yourself, your role, what you do:

My current role both at Southwest Airlines and in my own practice is to coach and develop leaders and individuals to become confident, successful, servant leaders in their career and in life. I support them through 1:1 session’s, small peer groups discussions, and in full leadership team development meetings. 

2)    What does being an authentic and transparent leader mean to you? 

I think of being authentic as aligning to your core values in all you do. Authenticity will show up in the thoughts and ideas you share, your actions, your communication etc.  You’re not someone who will just “go along” with the group if something doesn’t feel right to you, you’ll speak up because it is important to you to be true to yourself. This doesn’t mean you have to win every discussion, but it does mean people know where you stand and what’s important to you. 

One of the ways I think about being transparent as a leader and a coach is that I don’t say one thing and mean another – I want people to trust what I say. I tell people what they need to know and don’t sugar coat hard message.  I’m also honest in letting people know that not everyone needs to know everything – so if I’m not sharing information - there’s a reason. I strive to deliver any messages in a way that allows the other person to maintain their self-respect, confidence, and desire to succeed. Just being honest isn’t enough, its ability to put yourself in others shoes so that you are intentional about delivering the right message in the right way. 

3)    What do you feel is the hardest hurdle to overcome in your journey to be a more authentic and transparent leader?

Early on it was everything from fear, lack of confidence, not really knowing my own values well enough, and forgetting (often) to think about another’s perspective that got in my way. Authenticity has become so much easier as I’ve become comfortable with what’s most important to me and recognize how I think and feel when my values are not being respected. However, transparency can be hard when it comes to delivering constructive feedback. At times I still lean too far to one side (just giving the good feedback or being too harsh with the delivery). But, I’m getting better recognizing the development opportunity for them and for me. I’m also much better at admitting when I’ve messed up or don’t know something – sometimes it takes the burden off to just be vulnerable and open.

4)    Have you ever had a situation where you could have ‘sugar-coated’ it vs. give and communicate with honesty, truth and transparency? How did you deliver this communication to your team/employees/colleagues

 Yes – all the time. People often ask for feedback and what the really want it for someone to tell them it’s ok and that they did the right thing.  I do struggle at times to deliver the harder message, but I take my time in a conversation and come back around to something if I think I’ve either communicated poorly or haven’t been effective. I try to start with something positive and then share the opportunity they have to improve and help them create an action plan to move forward.

5)    Communicating with Transparency is typically very easy to do when things are going well, what do you do when things aren’t going well? How do you have those difficult conversations with candor and transparency?

I’ve spent a lot of time studying and working on my own emotional intelligence which helps me daily. For difficult conversations I prep for what may trigger me or for how I’ll find an opportunity to compose myself if things get emotional. I do my best to see things from their perspective and to give them the chance to tell their story – their way. We can all get very defensive in difficult situations, and our brains will shift into protecting us over being logical - but if I can help prevent someone from becoming defensive we can have a more productive conversation

6)      In your experience, how have you cultivated or created a culture of transparency and authenticity for your team and colleagues? 

- How do you communicate, what words do you use? It depends on the person, if it’s someone who needs to hear a direct message I deliver it in a more concise, straight forward way. If it’s someone who may be feeling more sensitive, I share it as an opportunity vs an issue. I use a lot of “we” language to communicate that we’re in this together. In all situations, I do my best not to overstate or exaggerate a situation – and to use words like opportunity vs challenge or growth vs problem. I also take responsibility for my part if I had a role OR I might share a situation I’ve been in or heard of where someone has received similar feedback and learned (and survived) from it. Knowing you’re not alone is very comforting to most.

- Individual Meetings? This is a little harder if you’re trying to tailor to various communication styles. So often, I’ll just state that up front “some of you are going to want me to cut to the chase while others are going to want a lot of detail and understanding…I’ll do my best to meet both needs”. I also ask a lot of questions and strive to listen more than I speak. But I will interrupt (politely) and redirect the discussion if someone is going off topic or being overly negative.

- Continuous feedback? This is a little easier if you’ve taken the time to get to know someone. When you know them well you know the best way to keep them open to hearing what you have to say. 

7) How do you feel right before you have to communicate something difficult:

I avoid getting anxious by trying to take a few minutes to center myself, say a prayer for the right words, and just breathe. If it’s a really difficult message I’ll practice a few times and make sure I know the important points to convey. I do feel a little anxious but these few practices help me take a little control over that feeling.

8) Any other thoughts on fostering authenticity and transparency in the workplace and in life? 

When I look back at some of the best Leaders I’ve worked for, they shared both of these characteristics and have been good role models.  I think both are crucial to a healthy career and life but full maturity of each may take some time. It helps to have someone model how it looks to live with authenticity and transparency and to receive regular feedback from a trusted advisor or mentor. I believe strongly in giving myself a break when I haven’t shown one or the other to someone (or to myself) and then try to understand what held me back. We’re all a work in progress but that’s part of the fun!

Thank you Natalie for providing your perspective and your experience. Cultivating authenticity and transparency is a continuous journey for all of us!

For those of you interested in starting or cultivating a yoga practice, go to YogaSport Dallas for more information. We offer 2 weeks of yoga classes for $39. If you have never tried yoga before, I’m also teaching the Beginners Series at the end of September. Series starts on Tuesday September 24th, ends on October 11th (3 weeks / Tues & Thurs nights at 7:30 – 8:30). Or message me directly with questions!