Forgiveness is a strange medicine given to others

First thing you do when you are angry with someone, forgive a person who hurt you deeply. It's a hard task to do, it's possible only if you will win the battle between your mind and heart, but winning this battle is not that easy, when you like someone you place them in your mind and save their contact to your phone book. But when you love someone you place them in your heart and in this case no need of contact you will connect them directly whenever you want to get connected.

Therefore, if a person of your mind did something you don't like you will react instantly and south for justice and you may break the relationship instantly, but you will never get hurt and will easily forget the incident. But if a person of your heart will ditch you and hurt you, you will be shocked and try to get the connections back on and wait till you get settled everything, after a lots of try when you will gain belief that it's over now, then finally you will start to move on anyways.

Move on is the first step towards forgiveness to that person, no one ever will forget that incident but it will not hurt you that much, you will feel normal after starting move on process, I experienced this many times. I don't know that clearly, but yes it depends upon what bruise they gave you. It may be just a petty thing they said you, or insulted, or hit you. It can be anything but forgetting the past every time is where the question lie.

It is easy to apologize for all wrong you have done. There is always difficulty in forgiveness. A human brain functions to take revenge. Some do take it. Some just leave it to karma. But some actually forgive. I belonged to these type. I used to forgive a lot as a child. But then adulthood hit. It showed me that you can't forgive everyone every time. But you can at least show them that you have forgiven them. That is diplomacy. True, it is. But that's what the world demands.

Honestly it hurts, but it doesn't destroy me like it used to.I used to go on crying for hours. But now no more. I am the person responsible for my own happiness. I took my life in my command again. Not giving the remote to anyone else. Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy to be normal. I started being happy for my own sake. Tried to forgive them, but every time all hurt came back, whenever I talked to them.

I am happy that I have learnt a lot from those six months and in the end that's what really matters. A mind gets rotten by all past garbage, you need to get out of it. Just learn from your mistakes and move on. Don't let it trouble your inner peace anymore. There is no way a memory can destroy you fully. At least not till you are in command of your peace.

I believe that having the desire to forgive is a major step in the direction of complete forgiveness. I assume that you have forgiven the person with whom you felt deeply hurt, and your desire is to let the person know that you have forgiven her or him.

However, in case my assumption is incorrect, and on the chance that your forgiveness is not yet complete; I suggest that you write three letters. After writing the three letters, you may not want to send any of them. If so, you may find that you have completely forgiven the person and you don’t need to say any more about the incident. There may be many reasons why you would want to communicate with the person; if so, I suggest you send only one letter. You could send the last letter or some variation of it that may be more to the point of what you want to say.

In the first letter, write about how you feel, or felt at the time of the event. Start with the facts. State what happened, what was said and what actions took place. Next, write about your feelings. After writing out the facts, state your feelings. Write something like, “When you said…, I felt like angry, betrayed, sad, etc. but focus on your feelings in this section. In the next section, you may address your thoughts associated with your feelings honestly.

In this section, you want to feel the pain and move through it. Keep writing in this vein until you feel you have gotten the majority of your negative feelings and associated thoughts out of your heart and head and onto paper. In the second letter, put yourself in the place of the other person and imagine how he or she may have been thinking. What do you think could have prompted the other person to do or say things that occurred during your encounter? Here you can give the person the benefit of the doubt and acknowledge their humanity.

In the third letter, share your current state of forgiveness. Let the person know how you feel and that you release her or him from any sense of obligation to you or any sense of trespass against you. Or use words that have a similar effect. This third letter might be the letter you want to send the person. If so, tailor it to your current situation and send it.

I believe if you thoughtfully prepare a forgiveness letter or letters, you will have achieved what you seek, the freedom afforded by forgiveness. At that point, it is optional whether you send a letter, make a phone call or meet in person; your forgiveness work is more or less done. Once you come to accept that truth and endorse it, you will be doing everything it takes to initiate that walk that liberates you and heals you.

Always bear in mind that forgiveness is not about the other person but about you. You are the one who is carrying the heavy weight, the pain, the torment, the anger, the bitterness, the tears, and hence you keep your wounds open. How deserving of such hellish pressure on you do you really deem that person to be? And how deserving of freedom, inner-peace, and self-value you deem yourself to be? Because, after all, that is what you ought to put in the balance of what matters most.

Therefore, it is crucial for all of us to make an effort in looking at our experiences, whatever deeply painful or devastating, with a perspective on the reasons for us (not their causes) beyond the emotional. All of them, with no exception, are not meant to crash us or stuck us in a life station of our journey but to push us forward towards the best; the best for us and the best of us. Stay blessed! #kishoreshintre #possessedbywritingspirit