Forgive or Pay Up

David W Palmer

(Matthew 18:21–22 NKJV) Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” {22} Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”

Jesus had just finished explaining to his apprentices that if a brother sinned against them, they should go one-on-one to seek reconciliation, etc. Peter must have been thinking about this. Perhaps he had a particular situation in mind—one in which his brother had apologized and asked for forgiveness, but then repeated the same sin.

Peter’s question is important; it goes to the issue of what level of repentance is required before we forgive. In other words, how long should we reserve our full and complete forgiveness until we see concrete evidence of a change in the other person’s behavior?

This question is extra significant for us, because it also challenges our understanding of God’s forgiveness of us. Does God forgive merely because we ask him to, or does he require some quality of evidence that our repentance is so genuine that we can guarantee that we will never do it again?

In verse 22 (above), Jesus said we should forgive up to “seventy times seven”—that is 490 times. That’s a lot of forgiving over an issue that is repeated 489 times. Is Jesus implying that for us holding any unforgiveness—after the perpetrator offers verbal repentance and asks you to forgive them—is worse than the sin committed against us? That’s a very good question; let’s read on with what Jesus said to see if we can discover his heart on this matter:

(Matthew 18:23–37 NKJV) “Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. {24} And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. {25} But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. {26} The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ {27} Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt.”

To explain the importance of forgiving on verbal request, Jesus told this parable. Without a doubt, the “servant” was guilty; he owed a significant debt. The king announced his judgment; the servant’s sentence was decreed: “that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made”—in other words, slavery for the servant and his family. This is another way of saying, “The wages of sin is death” (Rom. 6:23 NKJV). “The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’” The servant didn’t ask for forgiveness or debt-cancellation; he acknowledged his debt, but then asked for time to repay it. However, this may have been impossible for him to do.

Despite his debt being so large, the servant thought he could eventually pay for it. This is like the deception of religion; it believes that enough good works will eventually compensate for our sin, but it simply cannot.

Instead of agreeing to give the servant more time, and instead of selling him and his family to recoup the losses; the master was moved with compassion and paid the debt. This was not the outcome the servant asked for; it was far better. Now, instead of merely granting him time to pay, the king completely cancelled the debt. Why? Simply because he “fell down”—representing worshipful surrender—and said something.

I’m not sure how you would respond to a gift of “ten thousand talents”—an enormous amount of money—but most people would celebrate wildly with overwhelming gratitude. In today’s terms, this would be like receiving a gift of millions of dollars. And it was something infinitely better than what he had asked for; he was an unmerited recipient of a king’s magnanimous compassion and generosity. He should have felt like the most blessed man on earth; his family was saved, his freedom was preserved, and he owed the king nothing. This man should have been throwing a party, but let’s read on to see what he actually did:

(Matthew 18:28–34 NKJV) “But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’ {29} So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ {30} And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. {31} So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. {32} Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. {33} Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ {34} And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.”

As a result of not following the king’s—representing God’s—example of freely forgiving, the servant suffered a second judgment: his master “delivered him to the torturers…”

From this, we can see God’s heart for forgiveness. To receive his initial forgiveness—something he didn’t deserve or even initiate—the servant only had to come with worshipful reverence and admit his fault. The king came up with the idea of cancelling the debt. However, he expected something in return—not the repayment of the debt; but he did expect the forgiven servant to emulate the king’s compassion and generosity—in other words, his heart to forgive the undeserving.

Listen to how Jesus concludes and makes his point:

(Matthew 18:35 NKJV) “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”

Wow! There we have the answer to the original question that Peter asked about how many times to forgive. If the real question is how much evidence of true and complete repentance is needed before cancelling what others owe you, the answer is … only good attitude at the time of asking and verbal confession (See also: Luke 17:4).

Jesus told his long story to make the point that if we don’t forgive upon verbal request, we may be in a worse situation than the man who only owed us the proverbial “hundred denarii”—an insignificant amount compared with the “ten thousand talents” that we owed God.

The good news for us is that by his own initiative, God has cancelled the monumental debt we owed him; he has freely forgiven us and released us completely from any obligation to make up to him any losses we incurred to his kingdom. Wow! This is the amazing generosity and compassion of our loving God. However, if we don’t pass on the favor to those who owe us, the original debt becomes ours again, and tormentors await us to extract every last cent.

Today, I encourage you to realize you are completely forgiven—even if the mismanagement of your life has incurred great losses to God and his kingdom. Accept God’s compassionate and generous forgiveness; your debt has been completely cancelled, and now you owe him nothing. Your freedom is a gift of his compassion—a king’s bountiful generosity to you. However, I also encourage you to ensure that you have freely and completely cancelled all and anything any brother owes you—no matter how much loss they have incurred to your kingdom. (That is, if they at least show good attitude and what they may consider the equivalent of verbal repentance.)

Be like God today; give an overwhelming display of royal generosity and compassion to all who “owe” you: no more unforgiveness; no more waiting for proof of change; no more calling in of favors; and no more taking people “by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’” Today, freely receive and freely give generous, undeserved forgiveness of all that is owed. Then you will be like God:

(Matthew 10:8 NKJV) “… Freely you have received, freely give.”