Following the horse's authenticity to find our own
When we trust and follow the horse's authenticity, we find our own. I am reminded of this every session, and I'm in awe of it every time.
When we start a session from an open, organic space of mindful awareness, meeting the horses and clients where they are, the content for discussion arises naturally.
From the moment we step into the pasture, possibilities abound. Do the horses ignore us and keep grazing? Does one of the horses peel away and greet us? Does that horse stay to hang out, or say hello and walk away to graze again? Do the horses start running, playing or pushing each other around as determined by their hierarchy? What stories does the client read in all of this? What feelings come up?
Based on all of that input, and likely much more, we may craft an interactive activity to foster insight, build confidence and discover capabilities and coping skills.
We might receive some of this input by following a prescribed activity or session structure, but it likely won't be as rich — and maybe not what the client needs at that time.
Recently, one of our clients was trying to groom our mare Willow, who stood in the barn aisle connected to me by her halter and lead line. Willow, however, was keen to walk around and greet the other horses in their stalls. They offered signals that they did not want to interact with Willow, but she didn't listen and continued to seek interaction.
When asked for her take on what was happening, the client mentioned a friend who failed to respect boundaries. She talked about struggling to connect with others, especially when their energy is too intense, like Willow's was that day.
We asked the client which horse she would prefer to work with, and she was drawn to Tucker. She felt more at ease and able to be present with his calmer energy, and she appreciated his respect for personal space. Rather than he approaching her, she held out the back of her hand toward his nose to offer a respectful greeting. He reciprocated by sniffing her hand and allowing her to approach and stroke his neck.
In a similar session, I held one of our Quarter Horse geldings, Odin, in halter and lead line in the aisle as a client groomed him. He wanted to interact with MJ, who rejected his requests time and again. As he continued, the therapist asked the client if she knew anyone who did not respect boundaries. As it turns out, a peer at school was repeatedly disrespecting her boundaries.
Neither of these scenarios would have played out if I had put these horses on the cross-ties, limiting their movement and their ability to connect with the client.
Whether it's observing and/or directly interacting with the herd in the pasture, watching or communicating with a horse (or horses) at liberty in an arena or grooming a horse that has the freedom to move around, the key is the horse's autonomy (within the limitations of safety). Sometimes a plan and structure are necessary and helpful, but there's always a way to give the horse freedom to respond to and interact with clients according to their current environment and how the client is showing up in that moment.
The ways in which the clients and horses perceive and interact (or not) with one another are the catalysts for the session's content. It flows and pivots, often times away from any set plan, but always in a meaningful way. That's where we see the horse's authentic behaviors that fuel the client's interpretations and insights they need to grow and heal.