Five Uncomfortable Truths of Leadership

Lessons learned from the incomparable John Maxwell.

Leadership is often romanticized. We picture charismatic figures standing on stages, inspiring thousands with their words. We imagine confident decision-makers steering organizations toward success with ease. We envision leaders as people who have it all together—wise, courageous, and unshakable. But here’s the uncomfortable truth: leadership is not about comfort. It’s not about applause, titles, or authority. True leadership is about responsibility, sacrifice, and the willingness to embrace discomfort for the sake of others.

If you’re looking for a life of ease, leadership is not for you. But if you’re willing to step into the arena, to face challenges head-on, and to grow through the process, then you’re ready to uncover the uncomfortable truths that define great leaders.

1. Leadership Starts with Self-Leadership

The first uncomfortable truth is that you cannot lead others effectively until you’ve learned to lead yourself. This means confronting your own weaknesses, biases, and limitations. It means doing the hard work of self-discipline, self-awareness, and personal growth. As John Maxwell famously said, “To lead others, you must first lead yourself” (from The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership).

Self-leadership requires humility. It means admitting when you’re wrong, seeking feedback, and being willing to change. It’s uncomfortable because it forces you to confront the gap between who you are and who you need to be. But here’s the good news: every step you take toward self-improvement not only makes you a better leader but also sets an example for others to follow.

2. Leadership is About Serving, Not Being Served

Another uncomfortable truth is that leadership is not about power; it’s about service. The best leaders understand that their role is to serve the people they lead. This means putting others’ needs above your own, making decisions that benefit the team, and being willing to do the hard, unglamorous work that others might avoid.

Servant leadership is counterintuitive in a world that often equates leadership with privilege. But the reality is that true influence comes from adding value to others. As John Maxwell wisely noted, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care” (from The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership). When you serve others, you earn their trust, respect, and loyalty—and that’s when real leadership begins.

3. Leadership Requires Courage to Make Tough Decisions

One of the most uncomfortable aspects of leadership is the responsibility to make tough decisions. Leaders are often faced with choices that have no easy answers. Do you let someone go to protect the team? Do you take a risk that could lead to failure? Do you confront a team member who’s underperforming?

These decisions are rarely popular, and they often come with criticism or pushback. But a leader’s job is not to please everyone; it’s to do what’s right. This requires courage—the kind of courage that comes from a clear sense of purpose and a commitment to your values. As John Maxwell puts it, “A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way” (from The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership).

4. Leadership Means Embracing Failure and Learning from It

Failure is an inevitable part of leadership, and that’s another uncomfortable truth. No matter how skilled or experienced you are, you will make mistakes. You will face setbacks. You will encounter moments of doubt and disappointment.

But here’s the thing: failure is not the end of leadership; it’s the beginning of growth. Great leaders view failure as a teacher, not an enemy. They learn from their mistakes, adapt, and keep moving forward. As John Maxwell often reminds leaders, “Fail early, fail often, but always fail forward” (from Failing Forward: Turning Mistakes into Stepping Stones for Success).

5. Leadership is Lonely

Finally, leadership can be lonely. The higher you climb, the fewer people truly understand the weight of your responsibilities. You’ll have to make decisions that others won’t understand. You’ll carry burdens that others can’t see. And there will be times when you feel isolated, even in a room full of people.

But this loneliness is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of leadership. It’s a reminder that you’ve been entrusted with something greater than yourself. And while the journey may be lonely at times, it’s also deeply rewarding.

The Reward of Leadership

Yes, leadership is uncomfortable. It requires self-discipline, sacrifice, courage, resilience, and a willingness to stand alone. But here’s the beautiful truth: leadership is also one of the most fulfilling callings in life. It’s an opportunity to make a difference, to leave a legacy, and to help others reach their potential.

So, if you’re willing to embrace the uncomfortable truths of leadership, you’ll discover something extraordinary: the joy of leading others to a better future. And that, my friend, is worth every moment of discomfort.

As John Maxwell famously said,?“Everything rises and falls on leadership”?(from?The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership).

The world needs leaders who are willing to accept discomfort, grow through challenges, and lead with integrity and heart. Will you be one of them?

Embrace the uncomfortable truths of leadership, and you’ll find that the journey of leadership is one of the most rewarding paths you can take.