Five Top Secrets (From an Executive Coach) That Will Take The "Crazy" Out of Office Politics and Skyrocket Your Career. Starting Now.

I have an amazing older brother. We're pretty close. We both love golf; he makes me laugh, and he gets me. More than anyone else in the family, anyway. He's also an airline pilot, and I'm very proud of him.  But, his career path hasn't been easy. 

My brother has been 'let go' from more jobs than any other person I've ever known. And as an executive and career coach, I know a lot of people who received pink slips over the years. 

It was never about his skill. He's an excellent pilot. (I can't say the same for his driving. You need a passenger side braking system if you're in the car with him.) But, as a pilot, he's great. In fact he started volunteering in a local Civil Air Patrol in high school. He had his first flying lesson at 17 or 18 years of age. It's all he ever wanted to do. 

For him, the problem was politics. Or, full disclosure, his horrendous inability to navigate workplace politics. He combined this inability with a complete refusal to own his own part in the problems. Which left him with frequent flier miles in a revolving door. 

His favorite sentence after they fired him was always, 'That guy was an A*hole anyway.' 

Here's the reality of work. We can't do it alone. Even if we're an airline pilot behind a cockpit door. It takes other people to be successful.  And if we don't know how to navigate the communication and get those people to work with us, we will not succeed. Or at the very least, we'll make that success a lot harder to reach!

The bright side is there's a lot we can do to improve those relationships. Here are five tips you can put to use today:

1. Communicate with kindness. A simple tweak of a few words in an email can be the difference between results and resentment. 

For example, "I expected you to complete this by the end of the day yesterday. Why isn't it done?"  Ouch...message received. This email can put someone into an immediate defense mode. Try getting someone to do something when they're feeling the sting of your words. Won't happen.

But, "I know you meant to have this completed by the end of the day yesterday. How can I support you to get back on track?"  Will have a much better outcome. This person is more likely to feel appreciated. Valued..like you actually recognize that they did want to get the task completed. There's more to the story, and you're willing to listen to what it is. This response offers support, not criticism. 

2. Get agreement on expectations. Your subordinates are intelligent and capable people. Yes, you might be in a higher role in the organization right now; but it doesn't mean you're smarter. 

When there's a project or task that has to get done, talk about it. Spell out the hard deadline and then ask the person if it's realistic. If it's an unrealistic deadline, it's not going to happen. Period. Ask the subordinate for sound business reasons why it can't happen. Then, it's up to you as the leader to have their back.

If you have their back when they say it's impossible, they will honor every commitment they agree to. Every time. 

3.  Beef up your EQ. You can improve your emotional intelligence. It's important to take the time to do it. Two of my favorite books on the topic are Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman.

This is an important part of your professional development. Higher EQ means you can be effective in your personal interactions. And that's going to help you in every area of your life. Come to think of it, I'm going to send a copy to my brother. Better late than never. 

4. Have a plan. Everything you do in a day should have a plan. I tell my clients to have an outcome in mind. If you pick up the phone to make a call, know exactly why you're doing it. Even if it's only a check-in call. Ask yourself, what are the exact items I want to check on? Not a general how's it going? But a specific plan like, I want to know how far this project is on these three levels. 

Without a plan the conversation can veer off in a variety of directions. With a plan you stay in control. Over time your productivity improves. As will your results. 

5. Don't gossip. Not ever. You won't win. Gossip kills organizational culture. It sends good employees out the door. Things that you might not even consider as gossip, can still be gossip.  Like sharing your opinion about someone else's work product. Or commenting about someone's behavior at a meeting. 

Building influence means that people have to trust you. When you get caught up in nonsense, it diminishes your professionalism. Not to mention that your trust factor goes down faster than the elevator ride at Disney World.

Here's the thing, you have choices in  your career. You can do it the hard way like my brother did; or you can do it the easy way like my clients do.

Life's too short to take the bumpy road!  I hope these tips help make your path a little easier. 

Cynthia Corsetti is an Executive Coach. She also works with professionals as the make Career Transitions and has a Mastery Interview Program for those who want to excel. She cab be reached at: [email protected]