Five Tips to Handle Being Second-Guessed at Work

As a woman in the workplace, being second-guessed is unfortunately an all too familiar experience. It can be frustrating, disheartening, and can make you question your abilities and knowledge. But it's important to remember that being second-guessed does not define you, nor does it mean that you are incompetent.?

I've had my fair share of being second-guessed, and it's not always easy to brush off. However, over time, I've learned some valuable strategies for dealing with this type of situation and maintaining my confidence in the workplace.

#1 Be assertive & clarify your expertise

When you are being second-guessed, don’t be afraid to respectfully speak up and stand up for yourself. Speak up and make your voice heard. Take the time to clarify what you bring to the table and how your skills and knowledge contribute to the team. Explain your perspective or approach and offer evidence to support your point of view.?

Being confident and assertive in your communication can help you earn respect and credibility from your colleagues, and also make it clear that you're not someone who can be easily dismissed or undermined. This can help prevent others from questioning your abilities now, and in the future.

#2 Seek out allies

Find allies in your workplace who can support you and vouch for your expertise. These can be colleagues or managers who understand your strengths and can speak on your behalf, and back you up when you are being challenged. It's also important to seek out allies and supporters who can help you navigate challenging situations. This can be especially valuable if you're being second-guessed by someone in leadership. Look for colleagues or mentors who you trust and respect, and who can offer you guidance and support as you navigate this type of situation.

#3 Don't internalize it?

It's important to not take being second-guessed personally. It's not a reflection of your worth or value. Rather, it's a reflection of others' biases or lack of understanding. Oftentimes, people second-guess others because they either 1) don’t know the information in detail that you’re sharing 2) have a different perspective and are insistent that they are right or 3) have their own insecurities or doubts, and they feel like they need to assert their knowledge or expertise to feel more confident in themselves. Keeping this in mind can help you detach emotionally from the situation and avoid taking it to heart.??

#4 Realize you won’t be able to please everyone

I know it may be easier said than done, but here’s what I’ve had to keep in mind over my career - some people simply will not be pleased with something you do. And either you could have done something better or you actually have done the best you could and it simply isn’t enough. In both scenarios, at some point, you go to sleep and live to try another day. Worrying, stressing, and overthinking is never healthy for you.?

#5 Take care of yourself

As always, you need to focus on your own self-care and well-being. It can be easy to let these types of situations affect your confidence and self-esteem, but it's important to remember that you are more than your work or your job title. Make time for hobbies and activities that bring you joy and fulfillment outside of work, and focus on building a strong support network of friends and family who can help you maintain perspective and balance.

Being second-guessed in the workplace is never easy, but with these tips you can overcome the challenge and continue to excel in your career. Remember, you have the power to control how you respond to these situations. Your skills, knowledge, and expertise are valuable and should be celebrated, and you are capable of achieving great things in your career - no matter what challenges you may face along the way.?

Thanks for reading this article! I'm Velera Wilson, a global speaker, author, and consultant on a mission to help women own their worth and increase workplace confidence so they advance their careers and thrive as leaders. Submit speaking inquiries, get a copy of my book, You're Absolutely Worth It, Women’s Workplace Confidence report, or connect with me on Twitter.