Five Lessons for Leading a Rich Life

I recently celebrated my five year anniversary at Salesforce. ??

So I thought it would be fitting to share five lessons (including a bonus lesson at the end) I’ve learned along the way that have enriched my life. I’ve added an exercise along with each lesson to make it more actionable.

I hope you find at least one of these lessons to be insightful. Let me know what you think in the comments below! ???

1. Build your network by asking others “how can I help you”

Ori Brafman is the most well connected individual I’ve ever met. He’s a NYT best selling author and lecturer at UC Berkeley’s Haas School of Business who routinely works with F500 CEOs, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and other prominent figures. One day after class, I asked him how he built his network.

Ori replied, “Ask everyone you meet, ‘How can I help you?’, and if you help them, they will genuinely want to help you back.” Surprisingly simple, yet powerful.

Imagine if you applied this lesson to your life — work, entrepreneurship, family, friends. How might this impact existing relationships and your ability to forge new ones? How might a powerful network enrich your life?

Exercise: Pick one person this week you will help. Be curious about the challenges they are facing and how you can become the solution.

2. ‘Thank You’ goes a long way

“An employee who has been recognized is 63% more likely to stay at their job for the next three to six months, but 65% of employees haven't received any form of recognition for good work in the last year.” - recent study,

Recognition is powerful and underutilized.

Acknowledging someone’s contributions, especially if done consistently over time, will help nurture some of the most meaningful relationships in your life.

Here are some ways you can do this today - mailing a handwritten thank you card, kicking off your next team call with recognition, thank you email, or sending a text to a friend letting them know you are thinking of them. Be sincere and don’t worry about making it perfect. The most important thing is that you do it.

Relationships require upkeep and commitment, and grow stronger or fade out depending on decisions you make, and a simple thank you goes a long way.

Exercise: Pick someone to thank this week (bonus: add a recurring calendar reminder to thank someone)

3. How to conquer your fears and take action [two frameworks]

“Everything you've ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.” - George Addair

Here are two frameworks I've used in tandem to take action despite my fears:

A) Fear Setting

Fear setting is a reflection exercise that involves defining your worst nightmare, creating a contingency plan for it, and considering the upside if things worked out. I learned about it through a TED Talk by Tim Ferriss, who attributes his biggest business and personal successes to this framework.

Whether you’re considering switching careers, starting a business, having a difficult conversation, or other fear-inducing decision, consider using this framework. I've outlined the exercise template you can use below:

1. I am putting off/afraid of: [Fill in the blank]

• Define the worst thing(s) that can happen
• What can I do to prevent or decrease the likelihood of it happening?
• If the worst happen, what can you do to repair/who can you ask for help?

2. What might be the benefits of an attempt or partial success?

3. What is cost of inaction (Emotionally, Physically, and Financially) in 6 months, 1 year, and 3 years?

B) Regret Minimization Framework

This framework was coined by Jeff Bezos and starts with the question “In X years, will I regret not doing this?” It involves projecting yourself into the future, then looking back at your decision to see if it was worthwhile.

“I knew that when I was 80 I was not going to regret having tried this. I was not going to regret trying to participate in this thing called the Internet that I thought was going to be a really big deal. I knew that if I failed I wouldn’t regret that, but I knew the one thing I might regret is not ever having tried.” - Jeff Bezos

So let's get back to your fear-inducing decision. Frame your decision with a long-term perspective.

When you’re 80 years old and reflect back on your life, would you regret not having attempted [insert fear inducing decision]? If the answer is yes, there’s a good chance that you should do it. Life’s too short to live with regrets.

Exercise: Use both the Fear Setting and Regret Minimization Framework for a fear-inducing decision you are facing

4. On Getting Things Done (GTD)

I am a goals-driven person and pride myself in my ability to get things done. Here are some resources & concepts that I've found useful:

A) Create a detailed 3-year vision - Cameron Herald’s ‘Vivid Vision’ is the best book I’ve read on long-term goal setting. Vivid Vision is a tool that helps you create a detailed vision of where you want to be in three years. I would highly recommend adding this to your reading list.

B) Most Important Next Step (MINS) - Every goal, no matter how big or small, can be broken down into a series of 45 second tasks. For example, if you want to lose weight, ask yourself “what is the most important next step” or 45 second action you can take now to get you closer to your goal? It could be googling meal plans or signing up for a gym membership. For every task, ask yourself “what is the most important next step” and you’ll be amazed at how much you can accomplish.

C) Instead of saying “I can’t do it”, ask yourself “how can I do it” - The former stops the problem solving process while the latter starts it and opens up your mind to the possibilities and forces you to think and search for answers. I learned this mindset from Robert Kiyosaki’s ‘Rich Dad Poor Dad’.

D) Invert, always invert - Charlie Munger, Warren Buffett’s right hand man and Vice Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway, applies the inversion technique to solve difficult problems. Instead of thinking about what you want to achieve, the inversion technique would flip this in reverse and think about what you don’t want to happen and just avoid doing that.

“Invert, always invert: Turn a situation or problem upside down. Look at it backward. What happens if all our plans go wrong? Where don’t we want to go, and how do you get there? Instead of looking for success, make a list of how to fail instead – through sloth, envy, resentment, self-pity, entitlement, all the mental habits of self-defeat. Avoid these qualities and you will succeed. Tell me where I’m going to die, that is, so I don’t go there.” - Charlie Munger

Exercise: Apply one of these concepts this week

5. Always be interviewing

A former executive I used to work with told me to always be interviewing, even if I have no intention of switching roles or companies. Why? Interviewing will tell you how much you're worth in the job market. It also allows you to connect with recruiters and hiring managers at companies you may consider working with in the future.

Exercise: Reply to a recruiter’s LinkedIn message, schedule a phone call, and ask for the role’s compensation range

Bonus: Job Hunting Tips & Resources

Here are some tips & resources for job hunting:

A) Craft a compelling resume

My Personal Formula for a Winning Resume was written by Laszlo Bock, former Google CHRO, and clearly outlines how to craft a compelling resume.

B) Submit your resume via referral

• Let me repeat again -- referrals, referrals, referrals!
• Having someone endorse you and submit your resume on your behalf astronomically increases your chances of landing an interview (compared to submitting a cold application).
• As a hiring manager, if you had the option of spending half a day reviewing 1,000+ resumes collected through the company website or spending a half an hour reviewing 20 resumes submitted by trusted referrals, which one would you choose?
• The reality is that hiring managers are busy balancing their day-to-day with hiring top talent, so referrals are almost always prioritized over cold resumes.
• If you don't know someone at the company you're applying to, send a cold LinkedIn message...here's a template you can use to get started:
• Step One: Schedule Intro Call - "Hi [Name] - I recently came across a [Role Name] opening and saw that your team at [Company Name] is hiring! I've been working in [Function/Industry] for [X] years and am looking to explore new opportunities. I would love to set up a 15-minute phone call to learn more about your experiences, and if I might be a good fit for this role or I could also share my questions here via messaging. Please let me know which you would prefer. Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Thank you!"
• Step Two: Ask for a Referral - "Hi [Name] - Thanks so much for taking the time to speak to me today. You provided a lot of helpful insight into the [Role Name] position at [Company], and I'm excited to apply. Would you be able to submit my resume via referral? I have attached my resume for reference. Please let me know if I can provide any more information. I appreciate all your help and thanks again!"

Exercise: Send a cold LinkedIn message to someone at a different company you want to connect with or pass these tips along to someone you know who is job hunting