Five Keys to Achieving Your New Year's Resolutions

In late October I completed the California Ironman in Sacramento. I was an unlikely candidate to complete that 140.6-mile event consisting of a 2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike ride, and 26.2-mile run. I'm an older guy who for decades had been stuck in the same exercise groove of running a few miles a few times a week, lifting weights 20-30 minutes a few times a week, and cycling 10-12 miles every now and then. And a few years ago when I started getting into triathlons I couldn’t swim more than one length of the pool without gasping for air.

What got me out of that decades-long workout rut was the experience of volunteering as a nurse’s aide in ICUs in hot zones during the height of the Covid-19 pandemic and caring for critically-ill patients the majority of whom could not get out of their beds or breathe sufficiently on their own. That left me appreciating more than I had the simple blessings of being able to get up pain-free and walk, run or cycle in the sunshine and fresh air and breathe deeply. I started wondering how far I might be able to swim, cycle and run. I started swimming and cycling and running for all those patients who couldn’t do those things and likely never would again.

Completing an Ironman is a nice achievement, but I’ve since realized that doing that and $2.50 will get me a ride on public transportation in Chicago! There are obviously far more important goals to achieve in life, like being a better spouse or parent, being a better boss, becoming a better teacher, being a better friend, becoming a better Christian (or believer in whatever faith tradition you follow), volunteering to support a worthy cause, becoming more involved in your community, deepening your prayer life or meditation practice, expanding your knowledge and mind by learning something new and important, and so on. This essay is about pursuing those more important objectives.

With a new year and new resolutions on the horizon I find myself pondering the limits of what mind, body and spirit working in unison can accomplish. I also find myself wondering how many of us are accomplishing as much as we could, as much as we will wish we had accomplished as we near the end of our lives.

I was in an exercise rut for decades and staying in decent shape, but I was clearly not doing nearly as much as I could have been during those younger years. Now I wonder whether there are other areas of life in which I've gone for years doing okay but not nearly as well as I could be doing.

So with New Year’s resolutions on the horizon, I’d like to ask a question: Are you in a rut in any important area of your life, personally or professionally? Is there some area of your life that is okay but not nearly as good as you would like it to be? If so, what could you do in the coming year and beyond to get out of that rut?

Doing something like finishing an Ironman leaves you feeling more confident about achieving other goals in life. Based on that recent experience I’d like to suggest the following keys to achieving whatever goals you will be pursuing in 2023.

Focus. Based on my experience of training for triathlons, earning multiple graduate degrees, learning new languages, earning a Series 7 and a CNA certification, writing, preparing a talk, and much more it’s hard to think of something more important than focus. You aren't likely to win a prize unless you keep your eye steadily on it.

But while focus is a good thing, fixation is not. Fixation is focus on steroids and can lead us to neglect other matters of importance. Sometimes, for example, people can become so focused on advancing their careers that they don’t devote sufficient quality time to their most important relationships and those relationships suffer.

I once gave a talk to a group of finance professionals on the idea of integral success, of achieving balanced success in all of the areas of life that matter to you. After the talk a 40-something gentleman came up to me and said he attended multiple conferences a year and read books and articles all the time about how to become a better finance professional, but had never read a book or article about how to become a better spouse or parent. The problem wasn’t that he didn’t love his wife and children; the problem was that he was steadily focused on becoming a better finance professional, but not focused on becoming a better spouse or parent.

Faith. The dearly departed father of my dear friend Georgianna (Jordy) Shoemaker , a star lacrosse player and team captain at Notre Dame, a star human being, and recently a wonderful addition to Notre Dame’s development team, used to tell her that 90 percent of success is positive belief and 10 percent is skill. We could have an interesting discussion about those percentages, but what is clear is that unless you believe you can achieve the goal you have set your eyes on then you've already lost the battle.

For me as a Catholic this also involves having faith in God and in the good that God can accomplish in and through us in the world if only we believe... and do our part!

It is also critical that you continue to have faith when you encounter unexpected obstacles or setbacks in pursuit of your goal. In the California Ironman this year, for example, on race day there was a constant 25 to 39 miles per hour wind, so that for about half of the 112-mile bike route we were basically riding into a wind tunnel. Normally I go 18 to 20 miles per hour on the bike on a 100 mile ride but into the wind I was struggling to go 10 to 11 miles per hour. That was mentally and physically exhausting and made the bike ride take quite a bit longer than it otherwise would have (nearly an hour longer for me). That also left me with one less hour to complete the marathon and finish the entire 140.6-mile event within 17 hours. You start at 7am and have until midnight to finish.

When you encounter an unexpected obstacle like that you can become discouraged and give up or continue to believe that you are capable of the task you have set your mind to in spite of the obstacle.

I once asked a Notre Dame MBA student who was a Navy Seal if he could share a Seal Jedi mind trick for persevering during the Ironman if my mind and body wanted to quit. He said "Just focus on taking the next step."

I recalled that sage advice to focus on the next step you have to take rather than on the entire task that still lay before you when I completed the bike segment of the triathlon quite a bit more tired from fighting the wind than I originally thought I would be transitioning from bike to run. At that point I might have panicked had I focused on the fact that I now had to run 26.2 miles. I wouldn't have been sure that I could do that. But I was sure I could still move my legs and take the next step, so I just kept focusing on that.

And so I continued step after step and mile marker after mile marker thinking as I went that I could complete the marathon but likely not make the 17-hour cutoff. Then at the mile 21 marker I looked at my watch and realized I might still be able to make it after all. So having already completed 135 miles of the 140-mile course already I dug into the reserves of mind, body and spirit and ran the last 5 miles of the marathon faster than I’d run the first 5 miles and made the 17-hour cutoff with 25 minutes to spare and, amazingly enough, feeling fine.

Help. Humility involves knowing where and when you need help to accomplish your goals and asking for that help. By the time the marathon portion of the Ironman started for us slower triathletes it was dusk and most of the 26.2-mile route was on a largely unlit asphalt path through a park at night. Most of us did not have head lamps but some participants did and it was very helpful to remain close to them so you could see where you were going and not go off the path.

Sometimes when you are trying to accomplish a challenging goal it feels like you are running a marathon in the dark and don't know where you are going, which feels perilous. In those moments it’s important to continue to trust that you’re still on the right path and to stay close to someone more experienced who does know where they are going.

When I first thought about trying to complete a sprint triathlon a few years ago I could only swim one 25-meter length of the pool. A year later I was able to complete 1500 meter (.93 mile) swim in an Olympic distance triathlon in the summer and then the 1900-meter (1.2 mile) swim portion of the half Ironman a couple of months later in the fall of 2021, but at a snail-like 3 minute and 20 second per 100-meter pace (4 lengths of the pool).

With the indispensable help of my Notre Dame colleague and awesome swim coach Josh Skube this past fall I was able to complete the 3800 meter (2.4 mile) swim portion of the full Ironman at 2 minutes and 20 second per 100 meters, twice the distance a full minute per 100 meters faster. There is absolutely no way I could have done that without Josh’s help and without indispensable help and encouragement also from my Mendoza colleague and Ironman Chris Fruehwirth and my dear friend and Ironman Mitch Hoppenworth. They also all helped greatly by believing I could finish the Ironman in moments when I wasn't so sure.

Never be too proud to recognize where you need help and ask for it.

Commitment. Focus and faith are necessary but not sufficient. It’s essential also to be committed to the task you want to accomplish. If the goal is important to you then you have to give it the time and commitment it deserves. One trick that is helpful in maintaining a commitment is to create an audience by telling some people close to you what you are going to try to achieve. Knowing that they will be asking you how your pursuit of that goal is going increases the likelihood that you will remain committed to it. If you don’t share an important goal with anyone important in your life it becomes much easier to give up on it.

Celebration. During the Ironman you burn about 8,000 calories, and so for days after completing it I enjoyed eating basically whatever I wanted, a rare treat. It’s important after accomplishing whatever goal you are aiming at in the new year to take some time to celebrate the accomplishment. Some bosses inspire their people to scale a mountain and then immediately set their eyes on climbing some higher peak. Pushing yourself relentlessly, or pushing others relentlessly as a leader, is a sure-fire recipe for burnout.

I wish you all the best climbing whatever mountain you have your eyes on for 2023. And I hope that when you get to the top you take some time to enjoy the spectacular view before moving on to the next peak. That is a recipe for a joyful sense of accomplishment!