If at first you don’t succeed, have some cake!

Suffolk-based artist and author Charlie Mackesy’s 2019 book ‘The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse’ is one of the most heart-warming, poignant and welcome publications of our lifetimes. Not since A.A. Milne and E.H. Shepherd’s 1926 classic, which might have been entitled ‘The Boy, the Bear, the Tiger and the Donkey’*, have we been gifted an illustrated story that transcends all age groups containing such a treasure trove of wise mantras, underpinned by kindness, friendship, vulnerability and resilience. In throwing together a group of similarly unlikely friends (for the cheerful Tigger and the grumpy Eeyore, read the wary Fox and the greedy Mole), Mackesy succeeds in striking a chord with so many of us as we support children (and each other) in embracing the beauty and challenges of the world.

*apologies to fans of Piglet, Rabbit, Owl, Kanga and Roo.

The book and subsequent Oscar-winning animated screenplay have presented school teachers and leaders with a remarkable number of quotes that get right to the heart of so many of the values that schools champion. For growth mindset: “When have you been at your strongest?” asked the boy. “When I have dared to show my weakness.” For kindness: “Nothing beats kindness,” said the horse. “It sits quietly beyond all things.” For ambition and courage: “Most of the old moles I know wish they had listened less to their fears and more to their dreams.” For valuing every child: “I’m so small,” said the mole. “Yes,” said the boy, “but you make a huge difference”. And my personal favourite: “What do you think is the biggest waste of time?” “Comparing yourself to others,” said the mole.?

You may justifiably be wondering what this all has to do with country prep schools and the answer is the Mole’s favourite food: “If at first you don’t succeed, have some cake.” I like to think of schools as cakes (for the purposes of this article, it is a more helpful metaphor than Pooh’s love of honey). All schools share core ingredients and parents have rightly come to expect academic ambition and high standards of teaching and learning, underpinned by dedicated pastoral care to be the first two non-negotiable levels of sponge. Getting the right balance and quality of ingredients is clearly vital as the foundations are laid. When parents choose to invest in an independent education, they are however expecting more than just plain sponge, however good those layers might be.?

The icing on the cake is the hugely exciting and varied extra- and co-curricular curricular provision which you will find in a thriving boarding prep school. Not only does this save busy parents from taxiing their children to external sports, drama and dance clubs, but it crucially also enables teachers to gain a deeper understanding of what makes each child tick. Such an offering also presents us with further opportunities to stretch and challenge children, but also support them, laugh with them and pick them up when they fall. In addition to endless sport, music, art and drama, Orwell Park pupils benefit from an outdoor pool, an observatory, sailing, a residential at Mayo College in India, our very own assault course built by an army regiment, bushcraft and camping in our forest and a woodland forest school for the youngest children (often accompanied by our resident deer).?

Part of a great prep school education is understanding that children will get it wrong sometimes but that this is ultimately the only way in which they will learn and grow. In seeking to develop their passions, we must provide them with a wide range of platforms on which they can build their confidence and shine brightly. I firmly believe that all children are intelligent and all children are special. They have the capacity to do the most amazing things – it is our job and our privilege to help them find their intelligence or talent and to support them in realising their potential. The thicker the layer of icing (in my view it should be as thick as the sponge itself!), the better the chance we have to develop children’s characters and set them up for success at their senior schools and beyond. Today’s world requires children to develop an adaptable skillset alongside interpersonal and creative talents and the experience a boarding prep school can offer will only maximise this toolkit. Ultimately, prep school should be fun, memorable and packed with opportunities for children to throw themselves into. We return to 1926 for our final quote, “ You can’t stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.”

Guy Musson, Headmaster of Orwell Park School