FIRST LEAD YOURSELF. HOW ARE YOU TAKING PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY RIGHT NOW?

Your personal choices are a reflection of your leadership. So how are your choices supporting you? Serving you? When you reflect on the outcomes you are achieving, the progress you are making, how are you contributing to those outcomes and progress?

It is important to step back every now and then and understand how the choices you are making are influencing and impacting the experience you are having. This is part of leadership, being self-aware.

Let me tell you a story. Last week I led an online session. It was a fast moving, intensive, highly interactive session for an hour with a group of people from a variety of organisations. The speaker brief was very clear. The session needed to be leadership-focused, it needed to be relevant to the individuals, and it needed to be highly interactive so that people were engaged and would get some very valuable and practical takeaways they could implement following the session.

And I nailed it.

It was a great session with a range of interactive approaches included. There was tremendous interaction on the chat. There was the opportunity for people to contribute in the spotlight, with their microphone on, sharing their thoughts or questions. I led a group coaching session during the hour. And more. So there was a range of different ways that people could participate, be engaged, and learn.

At the conclusion of the session there was tremendous feedback in the chat about how great it was, what fantastic actions people had, how much they had learned, and how it had really broadened their opportunity in the leadership space. Which is amazing.

However, a couple of days later I received, via the session organiser, a specific piece of feedback that shocked me. And let me share this with you. This individual provided the feedback that they did not appreciate the interactivity in the session because they were not able to participate interactively as they were sharing a room with their partner. And this had prevented them from interacting. Not only that, after the session they had then had a fight with their partner about the whole situation. And so, they requested in future, they would like the sessions to not be interactive.

I was shocked. I really could not believe that someone would reflect on this experience like that.

So let's just take a step back. I have followed my speaker brief. This was an online session, so I have prepared on my side of the screen to provide great learning, great intensity and energy, interactivity in multiple modes, and the opportunity to be coached by me during the session. Multiple modes of interaction, learning and practical takeaways. And it was a great session. 99% of the people had an amazing experience.

“

We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.

~ George Bernard Shaw

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Then there is the other part of the experience. What happens on the participant’s side of the screen. This is what they control and what they can influence. And for this individual, they chose to be in a space that was occupied by someone else. They chose not to use some of the other interactive options as an alternative to having their microphone on for a spotlight moment. They chose to not get the best out of the session. And as a consequence, they apparently did not have a great experience. And they do not see or choose an opportunity to change this for themselves in the future, instead requesting that the session format change.

How you choose to participate and show up in a situation is a personal responsibility. Perhaps this individual did not have another room that they could go to. Yet there were several ways to interact in the session, which they chose not to use. Maybe they could have chosen a different space to be in during that one hour. I have even had people dial in for an hour from their car on the driveway, to get away from the chaos going on in their house. ?There are different things that we can do. Go to a quiet cafe and put your headset in. You get to make the choice about how you show up in any particular space.

Your leadership starts with you. To first lead yourself, you must first Face Up to how you are showing up. How are you participating in and contributing to your everyday, your world, and understand the impact that you are having on yourself, on your tribe, on your world. The next level of First Lead Yourself is to Show Up, at your best. To tap into your strengths, to be present and determine your direction.

The third element of First Lead Yourself is to Step Up your leadership. To learn new things, to expand yourself, to experiment with how that works for you and the difference it makes, and then to embody those things that really bring you to another level of leadership. Of realising your own potential.

So why am I sharing this? I think it is critical for you to consider how you are contributing to the outcomes you are getting. If you are not getting the outcome you desire, if you are not making the progress you are aiming for, then there is a real opportunity to look at how are you contributing to not getting the outcome. How are you contributing to not making sufficient progress.

In reflecting on this, you may discover an opportunity for you to first lead yourself and achieve the outcome that matters to you.

I’d love to know your thoughts.

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Focused on future proofing CEOs, Dr Stacey Ashley CSP is often described as the leader for leaders. With over 30 years’ experience, Stacey has helped 1000’s to develop their leadership competence, confidence and credibility. With 14 international Stevie awards, Stacey has been named twice in LinkedIn’s Top Voices. The author of six Amazon #1 best selling books on leadership, Stacey has a talent for translating complex concepts into simple and practical ideas for immediate application.

She typically speaks at conferences, develops leadership strategy and programs, consults, and coaches.

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