On Fire

I met up with my friend Andy Clay at the fire station on Monday. The station has a brilliant new firetruck. I do mean brilliant. It’s not only gorgeous bright red and chrome, it’s fit for purpose, strong, and genius. Before I share how, I have to introduce you to Andy.??

Most people try to meet their neighbors when they move. Andrea “Andy” Leebron-Clay did that and joined the local volunteer firefighters at age 70. She trained to become an EMT (Emergency Medical Technician).

She had learned that her local station needed volunteers. At first she thought they wouldn’t even entertain her application but she decided that was no excuse not to answer a need. She put in her application. She is all in. When it was hard to get into the emergency vehicles quickly, she bought lighter boots and kept going.?

Eight years later, on the days that Andy Clay is on duty she wakes up before the dual-tone squawk of her emergency responder alert hits its second cycle, checks her gear and starts the long journey down the mountain she lives on. Her headlights flicker past giant cedars on the drive as she makes her way to the scenes she is called to.?

Some of these scenes are hopelessly tragic. She quickly learned first hand how the worst ones play in the minds of first responders again and again. They return home holding the trauma in silence, unable to talk about what they’ve witnessed. Which is part of why there is such a high rate of suicide among first responders. Second only to veterans of war.?

Andy took action and trained to become a Support Officer on scene for emergency victims and the first responders who put their future on the line for every call. Now she is responding for the First Responders and those they serve. She has become an expert in putting out the fires of grief. I don’t know about you, but I want to be like Andy when I grow up.?

Andy says, “Time has a strange way of changing on emergency scenes. You start assessing the scene even as you step from the vehicle. You rush into the fight for their survival.?

I had been certified in grief and trauma aid precisely for moments like these, to help everyone at the scene: victims, responders, and bystanders. The course to become an EMT took six months to complete. And as an almost life-long nurse, with a Masters Degree in nursing, being an EMT is another skill all together. And grief and trauma work was a whole new world.”?

We all experience trauma of many types in day-to-day life and it can accumulate unless we deal with it as it comes.?

Remember, with trauma you dissolve or resolve.?

Here are 10 things that Andy employs in her toolbox to help all of us to release trauma as we go:

• Volunteering and serving helps you get out of tunneling, repeated replaying and isolation. Speaking of….
• Don’t isolate: It may feel counter-intuitive when you ache, but being with people and animals helps.?
• Engage: Don’t sink into the couch, engage in activities that you have enjoyed in the past or find new ones.?
• Ask for help when you need it.
• Accept the help and support from those offering it.
• Breathe: We all breath but slow deep breaths that are longer on the exhale than the inhale allow your nervous system to restore and reset.?
• Nutrition not fake adrenaline: We’ve heard this one, and it’s still true. Good nutrition, less stimulants. It’s a fact, your adrenals are already on overload. If you are stressed out, sugar and caffeine may feel soothing at first but the opposite is true. Backing off can help ease your stress.?
• Exercise: It doesn’t just increase your strength, it burns off stress and helps you feel better inside and out.??
• Shake it off: Think about your dog shaking off a stressor. Hey, Polar bears even shake after isolation. You can too. Try it. Even a few seconds can help.?
• Bonus: It’s not just you who benefits. Your family, your friends—all the people who are closest to you and are often the first to notice your struggles—they will gain much from the improved relationship you’ve built with yourself. It also helps your fellow “first responders”, who may be suffering silently in exactly the same way. When you allow yourself to be helped, you make it okay for them to get help, too.

Helping someone else who just faced trauma??

• Validate: No one wants to be told they shouldn’t feel a certain way or that they are wrong. Listen. If you can sincerely let them know that you understand why they might think or feel the way they do, that’s even better. Let them know that you have similar feelings, if you do.?

What methods for reducing stress and trauma have you found to be most effective??

And the new fire truck? Let’s talk about that next week because it is impressive, and deserves its own page and has everything to do with successful design in life and in business. I promise.?

Maybe we can all be a little more like Andy this week and take action to do the things that inspire us. What would you love to do that you’ve put off until later? It’s never too late. Ask Andy.?