Finding Your Voice: How to Speak Up with Confidence

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you were desperate to jump in and say your piece, but instead, you sat in silence, stewing over what you should have said? If you can relate, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with speaking up, whether in the workplace, social settings, or even in personal relationships.

This is more than just a personality quirk—it’s a serious issue. If you aren’t willing or able to advocate for yourself, rest assured that no one else will either. The concerns, ideas, solutions, or questions you have will never materialize if you don’t voice them at the right time.

The good news? Speaking up is a skill that can be learned and improved. If you want to be the type of person who confidently speaks up when it matters most, consider these nine practical strategies:

1. Know What You Stand For

Before you can confidently speak up, you need to have clarity about your values, priorities, and beliefs. When you know what truly matters to you—whether it’s fairness, creativity, integrity, or efficiency—you’ll recognize when a situation calls for your voice.

To build this self-awareness, take time to reflect on past situations where you felt strongly about something but stayed silent. What held you back? What issues do you care about deeply? Knowing these answers will help you determine when speaking up is necessary versus when silence might be the better choice.

2. Be Ready

If you struggle with speaking up, trying to wing it in the moment can feel overwhelming. Preparation is your best friend.

If you have an upcoming meeting where you need to share an idea or express a concern, prepare your talking points in advance. Practice them out loud. Think through possible responses or counterpoints others might raise. Having a game plan will boost your confidence and ensure you articulate your thoughts clearly.

3. Start Small

If the idea of speaking up in a large group feels intimidating, start with smaller, lower-pressure situations.

Practice sharing your thoughts in one-on-one conversations or in casual discussions with close colleagues or friends. Once you build confidence in those settings, it will feel more natural to express yourself in larger, more formal situations.

4. Write Down What You Want to Say

Not everyone is comfortable articulating their thoughts on the spot. If you tend to process information better through writing, use that to your advantage.

Before an important conversation, jot down the key points you want to convey. This will help you organize your thoughts and refine your message. While you won’t be able to hand in a script during a work meeting, having your ideas written down beforehand allows you to practice and feel more prepared when the time comes to speak up.

5. Find an Early Opening

The longer you hesitate, the harder it becomes to speak up. Your mind will start making excuses, convincing you that your thoughts aren’t important or that the moment has passed.

Instead, look for an early opening in the conversation. Jumping in sooner rather than later ensures you have the time and opportunity to make your point, rather than waiting until it’s too late or feeling like the discussion has moved on without you.

6. Recognize It’s Hard but Worthwhile

Let’s be honest—speaking up isn’t always easy. Sometimes, it feels downright uncomfortable. But acknowledging this difficulty can actually make it easier.

Research on realistic optimism suggests that people are more likely to follow through with a challenging task if they anticipate difficulty rather than pretending it will be easy. Knowing that speaking up will take effort, but is ultimately worthwhile, can help you push through discomfort and take action. (Source: Harvard Business Review)

7. Remind Yourself That Your Voice Matters

You have unique perspectives, experiences, and insights that no one else can offer. If you don’t share your thoughts, the world misses out on your contributions.

Instead of worrying about whether your point is good enough, remind yourself that your voice deserves to be heard. Your opinions and ideas have value, and you have every right to express them.

8. Stop Worrying About Others’ Opinions

It’s natural to consider how others will perceive you, but don’t let the fear of judgment hold you back.

Not everyone will agree with you, and that’s okay. Your job isn’t to please everyone—it’s to express yourself authentically. Focus on communicating your thoughts clearly and respectfully, and let go of the need for universal approval.

9. Learn the Art of Diplomacy

Speaking up doesn’t always mean being aggressive or confrontational. The way you frame your message can make a big difference in how it’s received.

Sometimes, directness is necessary. Other times, a more diplomatic approach will be more effective. Pay attention to tone, wording, and body language. Strive to be assertive without being abrasive. The more skilled you become at navigating conversations diplomatically, the easier it will be to speak up with confidence.

FAST ACTION STEPS

? Make a list of times where you didn't speak out and you should have. Note how each time may have negatively impacted you.

? Think about an important issue you are dealing with, and devise a way to speak up about it.

? The next time you feel the urge to speak up about something, just jump right in and do it. It could be as simple as correcting a server who misheard your order.

Coming Up in Next Week's Issue: The Benefits of Rest

Find More Resources to Build Your Confidence & Communication Skills

Speaking up for yourself is a skill that can be developed with practice and the right strategies. If you’re looking for more ways to build confidence, improve communication, and become more assertive, check out our career and personal development resources in the Wellness Resolve Shop. We offer tools designed to help you navigate challenges, stay organized, and advocate for yourself effectively.

Start taking control of your voice today!