Finding Your Voice
Kick Ass Copywriter and Content Creator

Finding Your Voice

I started my business in January 2019. My business has reached the ripe old age of four months. Boy have I learned a lot in those 16 weeks. I naively thought when I first started out that it would be enough to know how to deliver my service. I write for a living, I only need to know how to write, right? People will pay me to write for them. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Wrong.

You need to know everything. Or at least that's how it feels sometimes. You're the marketing expert, in charge of accounts, customer care and complaints (not had any of those yet). You need to network, do all the social media, bookkeeping and most importantly you have to do the client work. A huge learning curve but nothing a bit of planning and outsourcing can't handle.

The biggest learning point for me so far has been the mindset stuff. A friend of mine who encouraged me to go self employed in the first place told me the biggest thing I would need to take care of when I started my own business was my mental health. I honestly didn't know what she was on about. I had visions of sitting in cafes, sipping cappuccinos whilst tapping away on my laptop. I was going to be choosing my clients, picking my projects and setting my own hours. Then I actually went self employed and came crashing down to earth with a bump.

Every day is a roller-coaster. There are huge highs and deafening lows. Its been the biggest journey of self discovery I've ever been on. I've learned more about myself, my beliefs and my boundaries in the last 16 weeks than I have in the last forty years.

For me the absolute hardest thing to deal with has been the negativity I've encountered with an increasing online presence. When you're a big fish in a little pond you rarely encounter any negativity. Until I started my own business the only people I ever interacted with where my close circle of friends. People I knew in real life. When I started my business I needed to start growing my network and increasing my connections. It stands to reason that the more visible you become the more attention you attract and not everyone is going to love you. That, I found difficult.

I love praise. We all do. Negativity not so much. I'm not stupid enough to think I'm going to be everyone's cup of tea but the level of aggression I have experienced online took me by surprise. What shocked me more was how I reacted.

As the product of an abusive childhood, for years I had no-one to confide in, I had no voice. When I joined Facebook in 2008 suddenly I could speak. I had an outlet. I loved it. When I started my business my voice got louder and stronger and my confidence grew. Then I started being shot down. Getting into online arguments with, in most cases, men, who I felt were trying to put me in my place and shut me down. Men who would never agree with my point of view. Mansplaining at me. Demanding that I justify my opinions and perspectives in order for them to grant me permission to hold those opinions and beliefs. I was massively triggered and feeding into the negativity. I felt like they were trying to take my voice away from me. The voice that I had fought so hard for.

Not all men are behave in this way, I know that. Some of my biggest supporters have been men I've made connections with and they've been kind and willing to share their expertise and experience with me.

What I realised, was that although I wanted to challenge these negative, sexist behaviours and attitudes what I was actually doing was pouring more fuel on the fire. Worse still, at the same time I was pouring water on my own fire. I don't need to use my energy to fight these misplaced battles. It doesn't serve me. I need to keep my energy and my voice for the people who want to listen to what I have to say. Those are the people that deserve my attention.

Learning not be to baited by strangers on the internet is a daily practice and one I'm still working on. Its hard not to take it personally and it can be hard not to respond. But ultimately I'm here to do business and serve my clients. I can hold myself to account for my behaviour even when others cannot.





David J Bassler

President- BSMC, LLC. Contract Sales & Marketing for mid-sized manufacturing

5 年

"Every day is a roller-coaster. There are huge highs and deafening lows." You may be on to something :) Excellent essay...

Joanne L.

Marketing and Design at Visualisethisdesign.com

5 年

Love your post Clair, thank you for sharing. On a similar journey of building my own business like you and yes full of highs and lows but keep going, sure with these refreshing posts you’ll do well.

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Helen Hill

Immersive climate play experiences AVAILABLE NOW! ?? Climate education that inspires behaviour change to create a brighter, greener future for all ??♀? Semi-retired mermaid. Bunmum.???? Clumsy sod.

5 年

Fabulous and frank post. You have written your point beautifully here. I wrote a similar article about the horrors people are posting but I filled it with sarcasm instead ;-D Luckily, I have not encountered too much negativity yet, but it is sad that I am sat here waiting for that moment when someone kicks off as it is inevitable with me growing my presence too. Good luck with your business

Fiona Thomas

Author , Radio presenter , Intuitive Mentor , Spiritual Teacher @ F J Thomas

5 年

Love your story Claire????

Julie Barber - Certified French Translator UK

French to English translator specialising in the certified translation of business, legal, and personal documents, including certificates, for official use. Member of CIOL, the Chartered Institute of Linguists.

5 年

Keep up the good work. 4 months is early days for freelancing. I would not spend time arguing online. Stay neutral, explain yourself once, perhaps twice then leave it alone as it serves you no purpose

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