Finding the sweet spot between results and relationships

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In leadership, the ability to balance results and relationships has the potential to separate good leaders from great ones. Imagine walking a tightrope—lean too far in one direction, and you lose your footing. Overemphasize results, and you risk alienating your team; divert too much attention to your relationships, and you may fail to deliver on your objectives. Through my work with high-level leaders, I've seen how this delicate balance can either propel someone to the top or lead to their downfall.?

Using real client examples (names have been changed), let’s break down what can happen when you become too laser-focused on one aspect of your leadership — and how to regain your equilibrium when you lose your balance.?

The cost of missing the human element

As a strategy, focusing on results does have its benefits. Results-based leadership cuts through the noise, driving teams to hit clear targets and deliver tangible value . It can boost efficiency and accountability, and for the individual leader, accomplishment can boost their influence and credibility. But focusing on results alone leaves out a big piece of the leadership puzzle: the people. Failing to consider the people that make up your team can have a major impact on morale and employee wellbeing, which can undermine your company’s growth and productivity.?

My client, Drew, is a leader who openly acknowledges his results-oriented approach but has yet to shift his behavior. During a 360-feedback assessment, a direct report of two years shared a jarring experience: when Drew took over as the new leader, his first interaction involved reviewing the P&L and instructing the direct report to fire three people. This cold, numbers-driven decision overlooked the human element—disrupting long-standing working relationships to save a relatively small amount of money. Drew’s actions illustrate a common pitfall of results-focused leadership. People are not interchangeable parts in a machine; they build relationships and trust over time.

Another client, Carly, is intensely focused on accelerating throughput. However, her approach has alienated her peers and direct reports to the point where the CEO and owner of the company have intervened. While Carly’s critiques are often accurate, the way she communicates them has created resentment among her colleagues. People are so turned off that they actively don’t take her advice or address something, just because she pointed it out. In a firm that values collaboration and camaraderie, this has landed her in hot water.? Carly needs to consider how to deliver her message in a way that will get her the best outcome —? in this case, action by her colleagues.??

Both leaders illustrate that neglecting relationships can affect not just team dynamics, but long-term effectiveness. When leaders neglect these aspects, they risk undermining the very results they seek to improve.

When results take a back seat

Humans are social creatures, with an innate desire to be seen and heard as individuals, and we place enormous value on our connections with others — both personal and professional. Healthy work relationships help to create a positive work culture and increase employee engagement, which has been linked with increased productivity, profitability, and wellbeing. But the keyword there is healthy. When a leader is overly-focused on being liked or sacrifices their own wellbeing in service of their team’s comfort, things can go easily awry.?

Kate is a newly promoted VP with over 20 years of experience in the same organization. She often finds herself “in the weeds,” instead of focusing on strategy or negotiating with her boss and peers for the resources her team needs, because she’s so worried about burdening her staff with incremental work. When she asks someone to do something, she’ll say, “I know you’re super busy… But could you [fill in the blank]?” Kate’s concern for her team’s workload often leads her to take on extra tasks herself, working weekends to avoid “inconveniencing” her staff.

When a leader is too focused on their team, the results can be catastrophic. Philip’s laser-focus on his team’s happiness came at a significant cost. His boss, one of my clients, had little understanding of what Philip’s team actually did, nor did his team’s key business partners. So when the time came for a reorganization and cost-cutting, his team was the first to go because Philip wasn’t focused enough on driving results and communicating them. The layoff was heart-wrenching for Philip, who lamented that “we love each other,” but love alone wasn’t enough to justify their roles.

By prioritizing her team’s comfort over strategic priorities, Kate not only risks burnout — she fails to leverage her leadership role to its fullest. Leaders like Kate need to understand that their responsibility is not just to shield their teams from pressure, but to guide them through it, ensuring that both the team and the organization succeed. Philip’s experience is a sobering reminder that relationships, while essential, cannot stand alone. Effective leadership requires a clear focus on results and the ability to communicate those results to stakeholders.

Ask yourself: What approaches can you adopt to ensure that your leadership style supports both high performance and positive team relationships?

Finding balance?

Results and relationships are table stakes, and you need both to be an effective leader. Once you develop one skill, you don’t move on to the next one. You incorporate and build upon them , achieving a balanced, more comprehensive view of leadership.

The first step is to become more aware of your own thought patterns and behavioral tendencies. Shifting your mindset won’t happen overnight, but incremental change adds up over time. What could you do this week to focus on your impact or improve your relationships by five percent? By one percent? As you create a new game plan for your leadership, make sure to know your audience. How do those you interact with —?your boss, your direct reports, your cross-functional partners —?prefer to communicate?? What would be most effective, a one-on-one or a large group conversation??

To rebalance, it’s also important to understand how others perceive you and experience your leadership. And there’s only one to do that: ask for feedback . For this purpose, you want people to be as candid as possible. 360-degree feedback assessments, in which leaders make a point to solicit feedback through an executive coach (like me!) , can be one of the most effective ways to ensure total honesty. In my experience, most of the feedback I share from these sessions is news to them, something folks haven’t heard before or to this extent. But this lack of knowledge could have been detrimental to their career. As a leader, it is your responsibility to ask the question —?and to make sure your team feels psychologically safe enough to tell you the truth. If they don’t, that’s a reflection of you, not them.?

Ask yourself: Which stakeholders could provide me with valuable insights on my strengths and opportunities as a leader? How can I make them comfortable enough to solicit these feedback??

Balancing results and relationships is not just a challenge but a necessity for effective leadership. To quote author Jana Kingsford, “Balance is not something you find, it’s something you create.” Whether you lean toward results like Drew and Carly or prioritize relationships like Kate and Philip, the key is to integrate both aspects into your leadership style. By doing so, you can build a team that not only achieves its goals, but also thrives in a supportive, collaborative environment.?

What kind of leader do you want to be? Let’s talk about it.?

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