Finding Refuge Within Helps Humanity and Ourselves

I can think of all the lessons I was taught in school growing up or at home, and finding refuge within was not one of them. “Take care of yourself,” was a lesson, but far from the concept of finding refuge within yourself.?

When presented with the opportunity to give a Ted Talk , I had to share the message that had been most transformative in my life. Initially learned on mountain tops around the world, and better understood thanks to the message and teachings of Lama Geshe in the foothills of the Himalayas.?

Finding refuge within helps ease our suffering as humans and connects us with compassion. We cannot give to others what we are not willing to give to ourselves. Walking around with our unhealed wounds, and desperate clinging to everything out of ourselves for a chance at happiness or “success” leaves us susceptible to projecting our wounds and attachments onto others–creating an endless cycle of more suffering for humanity itself.

“Today's world conditions us to seek refuge, happiness, joy, security and everything outside of ourselves jobs, relationships, accomplishments, possessions. And when any of these things falter, we are left with ourselves.”

— TEDx Talk, Georgina Miranda

When I first read the words from Lama Geshe's message in 2013 on my way to scale Mt. Everest for a second time, I most related it to climbing the mountain itself.?

The Buddha said:?

“You yourself are your own refuge, Nobody else can be your refuge.?If you really tame your mind, you can attain the highest realization of the Buddha!”

I knew my mind required the ultimate taming to be able to climb a mountain where I had come into a close encounter with the possibility of death just two years prior. I knew I had to be my own refuge up there, but doing this in my everyday life meant something entirely different. It is a lesson I was never taught or even encouraged to seek as a goal.?

As women, I wish we were taught this lesson as young girls. Preparing us for all the mountains we would be climbing daily in our lives in our fight for equality and empowering us to not wait for someone or something to happen for us in life so that it could ultimately be better. We hold the power to make it so, within ourselves.

And so as life delivered many “life mountains,” this lesson became increasingly important. When stripped of everything I had, knew, and had built, the only place to go was in. And as I had trained and prepared for my actual climbs, the training to scale life’s mountains would actually be the same in finding the refuge within that Lama Geshe referenced: Train the Mind, Move the Body, Nourish the Soul.?

Finding refuge within is not a selfish act, but a necessary one for today’s wounded world. When we learn to climb our own inner mountains, not only can we help others in their climbs, but also not become a mountain for someone else to have to climb! Let’s get real– most of us know what that feels like.?

We can calm our anguish of searching everywhere out of ourselves for some kind of fulfillment or happiness, doing “whatever it takes” to get it.?

While I love adventures of all kind, my greatest one has been the one inward. The one that helped me find refuge within and changed my life entirely. It’s my invitation to anyone reading this or watching my Ted Talk—to journey inward. Again not as a self-serving act, but to be a positive force for ourselves and our world. To extend ourselves compassion so that we may be able to extend it to others. So that we can have the awareness to acknowledge the mountains others climb daily without praise and glory. So that we can experience our interconnectedness and the impact we can have on others and the world around us.?

The invitation comes from a woman who climbed to the top of the world and delved into the deepest and darkest parts of her soul to find refuge in the only place she ever would-- in herself.

I’m inspired to continue on this inward journey and help others do the same, at a personal, organizational, and social level. Awareness drives change.?

If you watched the talk and a message resonated with you or helped you in some way, please leave a comment on YouTube .