Finding the Light Within: A Reflection on Anora

Every year, I watch the Academy Awards, a tradition I began as a young girl with my mother. It has always been a special ritual for me, even in years like this one when I haven’t seen any of the nominated films. This year, Anora won the most awards, and my curiosity was piqued. When I saw that Xfinity was offering it at a very low price last Saturday, I settled in to watch.

When the credits rolled, I found myself puzzled. Why had this movie won so many accolades? What was it about this story that resonated so deeply with so many? I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. But something about Anora stayed with me—lingering in my thoughts through the night and into the next day.

Then, during my morning walk with my beloved canine prince, Romeo, the realization struck me:

At its core, Anora is about the deep human need for connection, even when the way we seek it can harm us.

(This might be a bit of a spoiler, but perhaps it will also offer you a different lens through which to view the film.)

The Two Essential Steps to Healing Our World

Watching Anora reaffirmed for me something I know to be true:

There are two essential things we must do to heal ourselves and the world around us.

1. First, we must connect with ourselves. This is always the first step, and yet, it is often the hardest. From an early age, many of us are conditioned to prioritize connection with others—meeting their needs, fulfilling their expectations—before ever learning how to connect with our own true selves. This disconnection has reached a crisis level in our society. If we do not first root ourselves in our authentic essence, we will continue to find ourselves in relationships built on imbalance, neediness, and transactional exchanges rather than genuine connection.
2. Only then can we truly connect with others. When we attempt to connect with others before knowing and honoring our true selves, relationships often become a game of power—one person up, the other down. The only way to have a truly meaningful connection is to approach others from a place of self-awareness, wholeness, and equality. Without that foundation, relationships become fragile and unfulfilling.

The Lessons of Anora

From my perspective, Anora—the film’s central character—is a woman who has mastered the art of sensitivity. As a popular sex worker at a strip club, she possesses an innate ability to tune in to the desires and emotions of those around her. This ability makes her exceptional at what she does.

However, my sense is that Anora was never taught to honor her inner gifts as something sacred. Instead, she used them purely for survival. She was doing what she needed to do to navigate her world, and she was succeeding—until the very person she had sought to please abruptly withdrew from her. And in that moment, she was left with nothing.

Because if there is no equality, there is no real relationship.

My Own Journey of Discovery

How do I know this truth so deeply? Because I, too, have lived it.

I was never a sex worker, but I became the ultimate people-pleaser. From a young age, I used my gifts—my sensitivity, my perception, and my relational intelligence—not to honor myself, but to serve others, often at my own expense. I falsely believed that if I wanted to achieve my dreams, it was entirely up to me. I carried that belief for decades, pouring myself into my work, giving endlessly, and expecting little to nothing in return.

But like Anora, I eventually realized that I had been giving myself away. Overworking. Never allowing myself to receive.

And like Anora, I discovered that this way of being is unsustainable.

I am now in recovery from this pattern, and part of my life’s work is to help other women reclaim their inner gifts—not as tools for survival, but as sacred aspects of their true selves. I guide women in learning to honor their gifts, to stand in their power, and to cultivate relationships rooted in mutual respect and equality.

An Invitation to Discover Your True Gifts

One of the most powerful ways to connect with your true self is to discover your inner gifts—the unique qualities that are woven into your soul, guiding you toward your life’s purpose.

For the past year and a half, I have been leading my Authentic Self Workshop, a transformative experience designed to help people uncover their deepest gifts and align with their soul’s calling. If you and a group of friends are interested in exploring this journey together, I would love to create a tailor-made workshop just for you. Please reach out, and we can set something up.

Illuminating Your Path

Interestingly, the name Anora means "light" or "radiance."

I invite you to connect with the light within you—to honor your gifts, embrace your true self, and let your inner radiance illuminate your path forward.

As Mark Nepo beautifully reminds us: "Whatever light you see in me is only mirroring the light you carry that you are close to knowing."

Let’s walk this path of self-discovery together.

(And don’t forget to check out the flyer below about my new offering: Email Therapy—a unique way to receive therapeutic support right from your own home and via your computer.

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