Finding Joy in Your Work, How to Raise Amazing Children, Letting Things Go, and a reminder to BE KIND

"You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles." 

— C. JoyBell C.

Well good morning my friend, how are you, how did you sleep?  I hit the bed at 10:00 and didn’t move for 7.456 hours. I woke to an amazing sunrise; it’s going to be another amazing day.

I met a young man yesterday, let’s call him Terry. Terry was referred to me by a mutual friend, we do similar work, but Terry is not living his best life. It was for that reason we were to meet, discuss, and see what kind of solutions we might be able to achieve together to help him find joy.

I’m not a therapist, but since our lives were aligned, it made sense to see the disconnect to how Terry was managing his world and comparing that management to how I live my life.

Quickly in the conversation, it became apparent that Terry was an amazing father, husband, but when it came to his vocation, he was not satisfied. He was in a position to call the shots, but management was suppressing his ability to lead. Terry needs to start his own firm and show the world his gifts.

We talked about how he might go about that dream; I’ll connect him with a couple of resources, I think in 6 months Terry will start his own company, I hope I can help him achieve this goal. Helping others brings me joy.  When we wrapped up lunch, Terry looked at me and said, “that was fun! Is this what you do?” I smiled, “yes, this is all I do, I talk to strangers and see if I can help them.” He said, “you live a pay it forward life” again causing me to smile.

Here’s a headline I read yesterday “Poll: 89 percent of UK gen-zers say their lives are meaningless”. I didn’t bother reading the article; the headline confirmed my suspicion that many parents are failing their children. They are not teaching them to live a purpose-driven life instead of allowing them to waste their life looking at a screen or play video games in the basement.

Although we may have lost a generation, I think there are lesson’s in the last few years that we should take notes and adjust how our kids raised. Here are a few lessons I can share from raising three amazing kids.

Tell them you love them more than necessary; a child needs to hear from their parents the love that is in their heart and don’t just say it, show it. A well-loved child is a child that is destined for success.

Teach them critical thinking skills at a young age. Ask them why and when they answer, ask them why again. Challenge them to think and think again.

Keep your kids busy, if they are athletic, get them involved in a year-round sport, if they artistic, get them involved in theater and art workshops, find their passion, and invest.

Make them go outside, the world is not happening in your home, it’s happening outside your home and the more exposure they have to connect with nature and yes, strangers, the better their life will become.

Teach them the proper way to shake a hand and look in the eye of an adult. Give them confidence by practicing and use your close friends to help hone their skills.

Teach them to read, a book a week is a good guide and if they are not prone to reading, get them an audible account and encourage them to listen to a book a week on any topic while sitting outside.

Limit their screen time; there is a lot of anger and hate on that little screen; they will see it, but talk about the evil and explain why the light always triumphs over darkness. If you are reading these words, that proves my point.

Discuss current events, explain in their age-appropriate language what happened and then ask for their input, their solution, again, critical thinking is one of the biggest blind spots for most children today.

Talk to them about proper nutrition and exercise. Walk with them at the end of the day, talk, share stories about your life so they can carry on your legacy and learn lessons from y our success and failures.

Tell them about sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Obviously, this conversation is not for a three-year-old, but at 13 or 14, a truth over harmony conversation might save you from becoming a grandparent at 31 or 32 years old.

Travel as much as possible, expose your children to different cultures. I’m not saying fly to Africa, but what I am saying is that the town you live has a certain vibe and there are places within driving distance that can show different ways of life.  Take short weekend trips, give them life experiences they will never forget, it’s up to you to open their minds.

I will be the first to say that I did not follow all the rules above, I was not a perfect father, but my work along with their mother and my Queen created three amazing contributing members of society.

Our children’s lives do have meaning; they are driven young men and women who are already making a positive impact on society. This is our legacy, and I am confident they will raise their children in a similar fashion and create another batch of engaging, impactful, humans being.

Your most important job in life is to be a parent. If you don’t have kids, become a role model to others who’s parents don’t prescribe to the above notions.  Your next most important role is to be an amazing grandparent. I’m looking forward to this role supporting our kids as they need help.

I’m done, I need to get to work, I keep looking at that glorious sunrise and will share my morning photo on social media if you care to take a peek. I hope this message resonates; I hope you gleaned one or two little nuggets that will help you find happiness and maybe understand your role as a father, mother, or transgender leading your offspring to an amazing impactful life.

Enjoy your day, smile at others, hell wink, winking is fun, but if I can give you one rule to follow today, it’s two words, it’s my life’s pure mission, those two words are: Be Kind.   

"You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles." 

— C. JoyBell C.