Finding Investors is like dating. We want to be 'wined & dined' too.

Isn't it funny how when we were young, we got so many things wrong? And then after we figured things out, we look back and wonder why we thought it was so hard. Take dating, for instance.

Would you walk up to a girl (or guy) that you are attracted to, and with the first words out of your mouth, ask them to marry you?

No of course you wouldn't. So why do that with investors?

Dealing with investors is no different to any other sort of long term relationship. There are dates and invitations, milestones and stages, approaches and exits, and if you get it wrong at any stage, you'll be left at the bar alone with your drink.

So do you remember the first time you approached a person that caught your eye? I'll bet that was awkward, you were nervous, uncomfortable, had a 'mintie' stuck in your throat, and your mouth was full of marbles. And however it went, you got through it. The sky didn't fall in, the world didn't end, and the sun came up the next day.

So after a while you tried it again, and this time it was easier. You were more conversational, relaxed and less anxious. And I'll bet the more often you did it, the better you got at holding down a conversation.

And eventually, you, like most of us, found someone that you liked so much, (and they you) that you moved on to relationship status. Which a whole other article, I suspect.

So why, when you are seeking investors, do you expect them to say yes to your marriage proposal on your first date? Or worse, 'verbally vomit' on them in the first 5 minutes of your initial conversation, and then be surprised when they decide to walk away and talk with someone more interesting?

Did you even stop to ask what they are interested in? Their likes and dislikes? The sort of partners that appeal to them, or the attributes that catch their eye?
What about what they bring to the relationship. Are they suitable to your needs, wants and desires?

Or did you just check out their 'assets' and decide that they were right for you for life, without conducting any 'due diligence'?

I can tell you that, as an investor, I'm not 'cheap'. Just like most other investors, I'm not going to 'get into bed' with the first person who flashes me their deck. Nor am I going to spend lots of time on "one-night-stands", by attending every pitching event in the calender. I like to be wined & dined, "chocolates & flowers", and long walks along the beach, holding hands and talking about the future.

But not if I think you are just after me for one thing. What about my needs, wants and desires? And besides, you need me more than I need you. For every one of you, there are a thousand others lined up behind, looking for a 'date'.

So stop being such an amateur, a douche.

Show some class and some personality. And invite me out properly.

Get an introduction from someone I trust. By all means be passionate, but throw in some wit & charm. And a little respect for good measure. Think about what I might also be looking for, and focus on asking good questions and paying attention to the answers. Make sure the venue is appropriate. And if the conversations flows naturally, and we get along, it'll just naturally lead to another date.

After all, if I am really worth the effort, don't you want to give it your best, and be a little patient? And if you are that special person, we just might start dating.

If you like this post, you'll enjoy my upcoming books on how you can apply these rules to your life and your business.

StartUp books due soon for release

• "Before You Quit Your Day Job" (pre-order special available)
• "After You Quit Your Day Job"
• "Confessions of a Serial Entrepreneur"

Find out about getting your advance copy of any, or the trilogy set.

If you like this article, you might also enjoy these other posts by Daniel

• Why I can't invest in you if you won't invest in yourself
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• Where is the right place to raise money for my startup (66k)
• Are you really an Entrepreneur, or just a small business person (6.7k)
• How To Go Viral on Linked In, without being an Influencer       (2.2k)
• How to raise $5million for your startup idea (and why you shouldn't) (33k)
• Why Pitching to a VC will almost always fail (10k)

About Daniel

Also traveling under the alias of 'That Startup Guy' , I am a co-founder of StartUp Foundation (The Startup Accelerator for Experienced Professionals) and am intensely, deeply, passionately dedicated to "The intersection between personal mastery & business entrepreneurship".

My goal is to help you, by guiding you through the steps, and past the challenges and pitfalls, to turn that 'Great Idea' into reality.

If you've got an experience about startup success (or failure), comment about it. If you've got a question, reach out to me via your preferred social media, or download my media/speakers kit. Other posts can be found here on Linkedin.