Finding the Calm in the Storm

One difference maker is being that person who can find calm when chaos is all around them. Distinguishing between something that triggers a false spike in adrenaline and something that is actually worth its attention to react.

Becoming someone who does not get rattled by words or deeds of others when it is truly intended to do so is a art all in of itself. When you are grounded, in control of your emotions and are aware of your surroundings, you are better equipped for the unknown. Being able to decide your response and remain calm is a very valuable attribute.

There is also something I call MBA. Minor but annoying. We let little stuff bother us that should not bother us. Think of a mosquito. It is the smallest little annoyance yet we can let it entirely ruin our day. Or waiting at a red light or waiting in the line of the grocery store. Why is that?

How we respond to fear and stimulus is different too for all of us. We come at it by drawing from our own past experiences and events we have lived. I have seen conditioned response as well when someone is subjected to the same thing over and over where they become less affected due to to a repeated event.

I once lived next to a runway in North Carolina. When I first moved there, I heard the planes every time they took off or landed. After a few weeks, I think my brain conditioned itself to cancel out the noise and it had much less impact on me. I believe we have the capacity to calm our thoughts during and after traumatic events. All of this comes from the past, or present. Living in the moment and recognizing that something we are thinking or feeling is coming from a place we choose now not to be and how we pivot is a tool worth having. Lesson in that is before you become conditioned to not respond to things that do need a response, pay attention to your surroundings. If its not something you need to give attention to, learn to tune it out.

With the past, I never try to let the emotion of a traumatic event be brought into my mind and not sit with it for a moment before I let it move on in my mind. I don't have to live there or stay there and I don't. I always know I can access past trauma and see it from a distance now that I have trained myself to do so. When something happens in the moment, we are thrust into fight or flight. I think for protective reasons, both can apply depending on the situation. To be able then to find a reasonable, less dramatic or less stressful response can change the dynamic of the entire situation for you and those around you.

There are times when you have to act and apply common sense to situations where you might find yourself meeting the storm with your own storm. This comes when we are protecting things or persons we love. The next time you have to make a decision to react, take a quick pause if possible to calculate your own response. The bridges you build are lasting and tearing them down with the wrong words or reactions can be a large emotional withdrawal that may have been avoided with just a moment of thinking and reacting in a different way.

Mark Green

Founder

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