Find Your Perfect Match: How to Select a Coach Who Really Gets You and Will Lead You to Success

Now is the time. Where do you start?

It’s time. You know you need to work with a coach to accomplish results you haven’t been able to create on your own, but where do you start? If you do an online search, you will find hundreds of thousands of coaches. Why so many? Because this profession is not regulated, and anyone can call themselves a coach. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Personally, when I am looking for someone to help me, I often prefer someone who has developed their own methods by improving upon the tools already available. Those who were good students in a program may or may not be highly effective if they haven’t had a chance to practice and integrate all the information they were taught. Credentials as well as the number of years of experience can be misleading. Being experienced is critically important but some seasoned coaches may be so set in their own ways that they may be outdated or too self-assured to keep learning.

Choosing a coach can be so overwhelming! And don’t get me started on those who are more focused on ego, status, and recognition than service, and spend more time looking for TV appearance opportunities than genuine service to the people they are paid to serve. So please understand I am not here to criticize anyone or their background and qualifications. Different people have different needs and would be best served by different coaches. I am glad we are not all the same. I just want you to find the best match for you.

Many different types of coaches

In the last few years, many of my LinkedIn connections in higher ed. have become coaches, some part-time as a side gig and others full-time. Some coaches offer services based entirely on their own work experience, and I would call them mentors rather than coaches. They can help someone who is in the same (or similar) type of position they had, as they can share valuable insights on what has worked for them. The problem though, is when they take on clients who are not like them and will not succeed by copying them.

Coaches who have successfully completed training to learn how to coach others, understand that the best way to help someone transform into the best version of themselves is by using skillful inquiry and guiding them to have their own breakthroughs rather than lecturing them on what they should think, feel, or do. Some coaches are more talented, skilled, and intuitive than others, and that is why you want to choose someone who really “gets you” and will be able to accelerate your progress by customizing their approach to you.

In most cases, a certified coach is better than one who didn’t complete any certification program, but it doesn’t mean a lot. Believe it or not, there are some certifications that can be completed in one weekend and cost less than a hundred bucks. But again, my point is not to let yourself be seduced by someone’s marketing and branding, but to read their blogs, watch their videos, look at their social media posts, and pay attention to who seems to be in alignment not just with your coaching goals but your value system and sensitivity level too. If what they post online really resonates with you, contact them. If it doesn’t feel right, move on. Find someone who is more interested in doing what’s in your best interest than someone who is focused on “closing the sale” no matter how good of a fit you are, or aren’t.?

Clarify what you need

Before you start scheduling introductory calls, ask yourself, what are you looking for? Do you want someone who used to have the job you have now, in which case you should look for a mentor? Do you want an expert in one particular system (e.g., a StrengthsQuest Coach, a DiSC coach, a MBTI coach, etc.) or do you want someone who specializes in leadership, self-mastery, and professional growth? Do you prefer a coach who specializes in your own industry? If you work in higher education, the answer should be yes.

A coach who doesn’t have strong expertise in higher education will lead you in the wrong direction when they don’t understand your organizational culture and constraints.

• For example, if you create a committee (because of the importance of shared governance) they may think you lack confidence in your own opinions, suffer from chronic self-doubt, or lack decisiveness.
• If an employee isn’t performing well and you say you are starting a long and tedious process of documenting their unacceptable behavior and developing a professional development plan, they may think you should fire them on the spot and work on your procrastination issues, or avoidance of conflict, or lack of courage.
• If you are having issues with a faculty member, your coach may think you are shying away from using your authority and not understand that most faculty members are… how do I put this… not too keen on feeling controlled by someone else and showing blind obedience.

So, watch out! I could give you hundreds of examples of cases of poor matches between coaches and clients, so please, be clear about what you want and need before you choose a coach.

How I became a coach over 10 years ago

When I quit my last job, I had worked in the California Community College System for 13 years, managing regional and statewide grants, which allowed me to work closely with dozens of colleges. I loved higher education but as someone who is wired for productivity, efficiency, and innovation, I was often frustrated. I didn’t choose coaching; coaching chose me. Being a lifelong learner, after finishing my MBA and my Ed.D. I completed multiple coaching certifications because it was fun for me! For several years I worked with clients nights and weekends, until I had to admit that my hobby/passion was more fulfilling than my day job so I quit and I never regretted it.

My clients tell me they value my multifaceted approach to coaching, knowing when to raise the bar and empower them to step up, and when to encourage them to develop more self-compassion and quiet down their inner critic. Executive coaching, at least the way I do it, is far more than sharing strategies. It is about understanding the client’s belief system, values, goals, and using skillful inquiry to help them let go of what no longer serves them, so that they can shine as their authentic self. Exceptional leadership stems from self-mastery. That is why reading “how to” books isn’t effective enough. Long-lasting change requires unlearning before we can learn and implement new tools and strategies. The key to success is to be well attuned to each client, and never using a cookie-cutter approach. If you would like to experience having someone on your side who really gets you, accelerates your growth, gets you unstuck, and leads you to career fulfillment and a better quality of life, click here to schedule a complimentary call with me. Talk to you soon!

About the author: Dr. Audrey Reille has empowered thousands of professionals through one-on-one coaching, group coaching, speaking engagements, and online courses. Audrey is the go-to executive coach for leaders in higher education administration. She empowers them to thrive by improving communication, confidence, executive presence, effectiveness reducing stress, optimizing strategies, improving professional relationships, and developing a strong and empowered mindset. For more information and free resources, visit https://thrivinginadmin.com