Find Love in Whatever Form It Comes In for You

In this series, professionals describe what numbers govern their happiness. Write your own #MyMetric post here.

Success is one word that has so many different meanings and conjures up dreams. Research has shown that when you are in your 20s, most people think of success as being rich or famous. Interesting however that when you look at the longest study ever conducted from teens to people in their 70s, success and happiness actually came in the form of relationships. 

When I was a young girl, getting into the representative netball team was the sign that I was truly successful; winning that grand final was up there at 13 years old and I would train for hours each night so that I could achieve this goal. Leaving school and getting my first job, then there was climbing the corporate ladder. At 21 years old, traveling around the world, with no mobile phone and no ticket home, surviving, finding a place to sleep, and something to eat was a success.

Success comes in all shapes and sizes. In business, your success is pretty simple: How much is your businesses growing and how quickly can it grow? That may create a successful business and people may look at you and say you are a success, and maybe on one level you are, but is it true success?

During my travels as a 21 years old, I worked on David Bowie's yacht and I met some of the most rich and famous people in the world. After the first “OMG, that is Blah and Blah,” you quickly realise that they are just people, and even though they can buy seriously big diamonds and can afford to go on this very snazzy white yacht, not all seemed to be successful. Some of them were completely unsatisfied with their lives. They had either married poorly, or wanted more success, or were just simply unhappy.  

One of these was Robin Williams, a clever comedian who was seriously the life of the party. The second he arrived on the boat, everyone was laughing and he was the centre of attention. Even when the dingy was taking him ashore you could hear his jokes and voice from a great distance. You then learn that he took his own life and had a very dark cloud to his life; his death makes you really wonder, "What is success?" 

Having a business that has been successful has allowed my husband and me financial freedom. We are not super rich like the Murdochs and never will be, but we have enough so that we can choose what we want to do and not have to work. So in one sense we are successful, but where our true success lies is in Love. Whether it was luck, fate, or a sixth sense, I married the man of my dreams; he is my perfect man and he brings the best out in me and is totally supportive of my work and life. I have four very different children whom I adore, and this is where I see my true success. When you are loved and you love back then you are actually happy and confident in who you are.

So my interpretation of success is just that. To find love in whatever form that comes in for you. The rest does not really matter that much, as fortunes and businesses are lost and rebuilt, but love is the deep feeling that shows you where happiness and in turn success really is.

More posts on this topic:

• “Success Is a Moving Target. Here’s How I Know When I’ve Hit the Mark.” — Suze Orman, television host, author, motivational speaker, producer
• “Exit Interviews Reveal What Your Employees Really Think. Are You Ready?” — Shane Atchison, CEO at Possible
• “My Metric for Success? It’s All About Impact” — Sallie Krawcheck, CEO and Co-founder of Ellevest
• “I Thought I Was Short on Time; Now I'm Long on Meaning” — Maynard Webb, Chairman, Yahoo!; Former COO, eBay
• “Maybe Woody Allen Was Right — 80% of Success Is Just Showing Up” — Whitney Johnson, thinker, author, speaker, advisor, coach
• “How to Turn the To-Do List into a 'Winner List'” — Naomi Simson, Founding Director, RedBalloon; Author, Blogger, Speaker
• “Wisdom from My Grandfather: You're Only in Trouble When Life Stops Being Interesting” — Nicholas Thompson, Editor of NewYorker.com
• “There’s No ‘I’ in Team. No ‘I’ in Success, Either.” — Bob Nardelli, Former Chairman and CEO of The Home Depot and Chrysler Corp.
• “When Was the Last Time You Were ‘in the Zone’?” — Neil Blumenthal, Co-Founder and Co-CEO at Warby Parker
• “Why I've Learned to Celebrate the Daily Successes” — Marcus Samuelsson, Chef and Author at Marcus Samuelsson Group
• “Successful Companies Don't Just Talk About Gender Diversity. They Do This.” — Jonas Prising, Chairwoman & CEO of ManpowerGroup
• “When I've Opened Doors for Others, I Know I've Made an Impact” — Carrie Schwab-Pomerantz, President, Charles Schwab Foundation & Senior Vice President, Charles Schwab
• “My Metric of Success? Giving Away Over $1 Billion” — T. Boone Pickens, Founder, Chairman and CEO at BP Capital and TBP Investments Management