Filling the hole after Loss

We all experience loss from an early age. I have lost my husband, father, friends, colleagues, managers - we all have. We experience social loss and at the moment global loss. Whilst we have also gained as well, so many professionals, leaders, executives and business owners I work with continue to tell me about loss. Picking up after loss takes time. It cannot be rushed and our body, brain and spirit decides when the loss is past and it is time to move on. We can do a lot to assist ourselves and it takes ritual and discipline to continue to move through loss each and every day. I also see many professionals that continue to tell me they have moved through the loss and out the other side, but it is clear they have not, and the question is why?

Well, there are many reasons, however, there are a couple of clear indicators, 1) there is still fear present and 2) the hole after loss has been filled with something else quicker than the loss has been processed. Loss can leave you empty and stuck, it can make emotions rise up that you never knew you had and it can mobilse us to fill our lives with something else to avoid the pain and hurt. On the other side of this, is how loss can motivate and awaken us to what is really important and what we are not prepared to put up with. It can help us to grow our appreciation and give us a direction moving forward. One of the most significant losses I see in workplaces that immobilise staff is the loss of a manager or leader. The leader may move to another job, career or business.

The loss of a great leader to a team leaves a wake that seems like it is impossible to overcome. The pain is real, felt in the body and heart, so debilitating that for many it is hard to declutter the emotionality and fog to work through it and out the other side. A great leader moves us to be our best, they are inspiring and they have a way with people. Great leaders are conscious in their role and stretch both themselves and others. When they leave, the loss is felt by individuals and the team as a whole. When this happens it is critical to have a map, a plan and commitment to take staff on the journey of healing and out the other end.

When there is this loss, it is too hard to do on our own for we need someone else to ask the right questions, declutter the mind and emotionality to work through the pain. I see it time and time again and professionals are grateful for the opportunity to have a professional to take them on the journey of change. Try not to waste the losses, it is important to use them to explore, debrief, let go and rebuild. How have you and do you fill the losses in your life? Reach out today, look at past losses so you can reconnect with yourself in a positive and healthy way. Connect me on [email protected].