Fidelity in the Business World: Choosing the Right Tech Tools & Ending Things with 'The Other Men'

With the recent public outcry in the wake of that extramarital affair site saga, now is a perfectly appropriate time to address the real elephant in the modern co-working space - fidelity around tech tools, of course.

It's long been a taboo topic in the IT space. Much like women tend to grow inextricably close to their favourite shoe brand, business owners become overly very fond of the tools that, likely at one stage, helped them to achieve success in their business. It worked at one point - and even though it maynotexactly be working now, there's an element of discomfort, and perhaps shame, attached to giving what was once a much loved tech tool the boot...

...and of course cosying up to someone (err something?) new.

It happened to me recently. It started with a public proclamation of my absolute love for a tool in a Facebook group that I'm active in, about a year ago. In my over-emphatic joy at how this tool had transformed my business, I had blabbed on positively about it for months. I became friends with the development and on-boarding team (even inviting them to my Christmas party), shared tips on social media and kept a big stack of marketing material in my office, which I shoved in the face of just about every customer that dared walk through the doors. This particular tool had made my life so easy - and I was shouting it from the rooftops! I had bonded with their sales team over spinach dip, for God's sake! It was love.

Slowly, over the next year, business changed and the way that I wanted to interact with customers changed. This particular tool was awesome, but it was only about 90% of the way there for my particular needs. Because of the compliance issues associated with switching to a new tool, I put it off until the 11th hour, when there was a good time at the end of the financial year to make the swap. The change happened stealthily, over a weekend, and psychologically I brushed the whole thing under the rug. Maybe no one would notice...

I had cheated on one of my favourite tools, and there was no going back. It had become 'the other man' quicker than my last relationship with a real man!

Of course, a mere three days later, a message appeared from someone in the Facebook group asking about the tool. "Well," I confided in a private message, "I actually changed. Don't get me wrong, it's awesome, and I loved it, but it just didn't do everything I needed it to." "Oh," he replied. "I actually switched to that tool because you raved on so much about it. Do you mind if I ask why you changed?" I cringed. Oh no! What had I done? I felt like a cheat - a publicly exposed villain who had turned her back on a relationship of substance. In the world of dating, this tool would have definitely met my Grandmother. How could I explain?

What ensued was an uncomfortable, but very honest, conversation about his business, and mine. And it turned out that it was working out well for him - hoorah! All was not lost.

My extreme level of discomfort caused me to reflect a bit about my reaction. What was it exactly that was brought up for me? Guilt? Fear? I couldn't put my finger on it at first, but did have a few key lessons that came out of the situation.

#1: Just because it works for you at one point, doesn't mean it always will

Fortunately, we're not required to sign any de-facto or marriage documentation with the technology tools we choose (as most are now well-priced at monthly or at the most annual subscriptions). Much like that shaggy-haired surfer dude you met at the pub and who worked so well for you last summer (what was his name again?) you can opt out at any time. In fact, most developers now are very flexible with their refunds, so even if you get a few months into a subscription on a tool and realise it's not the best choice, you can usually negotiate. Meaning, you don't have to wait until you find out about his obsession with dog astrology before you give him the boot! Things don't have to get that far! Uh...anyways...

The thing is, just like humans, businesses ebb and flow. In my situation, I had a need to automate my recurring subscriptions for customers completely - and had to switch to make that happen. It might be that you had a great tool and a new one is released that works just a little bit better for what you need.

#2: Your decisions are not a reflection of your acuity as a business owner

It can be hard to separate our confidence in running our business from each and every decision we make. And sometimes, we make decisions that we think are the best thing the given time, and that changes. Being agile is an important skill to have in taking your business to the next level - and if things don't work out, there can be a lot of power in canning things and moving on, rather than dwelling on what's not working.

There is one awesome business owner I know, who owns a business that operates in every state in Australia. He loves reading about tech tools, and has switched about sixteen times to get to his current configuration. It's to the point where his team are saying, "enough with the tools!" In jest, I think! Because the business is growing rapidly and they need to be flexible in order to meet demand. It's a part of his success as a decision maker.

#3: You can still be friends. Really.

In stark contrast to the world of human relationships, breaking up with a tech tool does not in fact mean that you are required to cut all ties and, hmm what's the most appropriate comparison, block their Facebook Business Page? Remove your +1 on Google Plus? Keep those tools as backups in your tool belt, to recommend to colleagues and friends in business. Just because it doesn't work for you, doesn't mean it won't work for someone else.

Yes, the world of technology can feel like the world of love and relationships at times, especially with all the metaphors I've been throwing around. Rather than being in an exclusive relationship with your technology, I encourage you to get out there and explore, to make sure you find the right fit for wherever you're at right now. There's no need to sneak onto a secret website - you can do it out in the open - and in fact it's your right as a business owner to be informed of the changes in technology that might help you run your business better.

I am formally giving you permission to part ways, publicly even, with a tool that's just not working for you. Remember! Just like your nan would say, keep it clean:

• No name-calling
• No talking about the areas where you weren't satisfied (unless it's constructive)
• No crying for too long - make a clean break and stick to your guns
• Don't move on with someone new until you're really sure it's the right fit (no matter how long the 'free trial' is)