A few things to keep in mind through all of this.

Scale. Context. Role.

Scale: there is a difference between: a) an institutionally racist police force that executes people on the street or a public education system that provides inferior education to generations of black, brown and immigrant kids; and b) an employer that doesn’t provide sufficient leadership roles to people of color or tolerates casual racism at the work place. All of these are bad. But some are obviously worse. Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. However, moral outrage, guilt and privilege all exist on a continuum. Scale is important. Don't let yourself or others off the hook. Do put things into perspective.

Context: racism in America is a huge, historical problem that goes right to the core of how the country was founded and operates. However, there is also racism, islamophobia, xenophobia, antisemitism etc. in Europe, in Latin America, in Africa, in Asia, in the Middle East and in every corner of the globe. The events in America are a trigger, but we also need to focus on the racism that is under our noses, every day, wherever we are.   

Role: everyone has a unique role to play. Public protest and showing solidarity online and offline are critically important components of how social change happens. However, we all need to think about what our leverage is. You might not be able to play a very big role (but you can play a small role) in stamping out racism in the US police force or lifting millions of black and brown people out of poverty. But maybe you can play a very big and impactful role in ceasing to tolerate racism when you see it at work, among friends or in your family. Not afterwards, but in the moment. Stand up for your friends and colleagues of color even when they aren’t in the room. Play your role. Speak up. Use your leverage.

Casual racism.

Given my context and my role, I am focusing my efforts on telling colleagues and friends to stop tolerating ‘casual racism’.

Here are some real-life examples:

·      Person 1: [To a Muslim colleague] Yeah but you are okay, you are not like those people who don’t drink alcohol.

·      Person 2: [Said among colleagues as a joke] You know how Southern Europeans are, always lazy.

·      Person 3: [To an Asian colleague, as a joke] You are Asian, shouldn’t you be good at Math? 

·      Person 4: [To a Black colleague, as a joke] Yeah, but you are not a real Black person, when is the last time you went anywhere near a ghetto?

·      Person 5: [To a non-White colleague who is from a place where the majority race is White]: Where are you from? A: The UK. Response: No, but where are you really from? Where were you before that? Where are your parents from?

·      Person 6: [To a non-White colleague, as a joke] I love your tan!

In general, it is best to avoid singling out any colleague or friend solely on the basis of their race, religion ethnicity etc. for whatever reason. 

This is not about political correctness, it’s about empathy. It’s about taking a few seconds to imagine what it must be like to be the only persons of color in your team or in your whole office. How hard and how isolating that can be. Don’t make it harder.

It’s important to recognize that while maybe you are not making monkey noises at me or calling me a nigger, such comments and jokes, can still be very hurtful, embarrassing and uncomfortable.