Festivals & Inclusion at Work

"The way we do one thing, we do everything," a piece of wisdom from Richard Rohr, resonates with me deeply as I find myself reflecting on the essence of consent and personal boundaries during the onset of a long weekend marked by the Holi festival. This time used to be filled with joy and celebration for years for me and when surrounded by familiar people and friends, still is. But, considering that I have been away from them for some years now, this time has also paradoxically become a moment of introspection for me, prompting a desire to explore the nuanced dynamics of consent during this particular festival as it is built on the very premise of this value.

Like all years now, I look at the open Holi party events- and the ones doing rounds in companies, societies and the ones that we get invited to at the last minute- I look at the world around me and wonder whether this party will truly understand “consent” and do these people deserve to play this festival that demands consent as a basic requirement to participate.?

Why am I, dwelling on the concept of consent during a time meant for relaxation and joy? Because I have had bad share of experiences. I have heard and seen enough incidents that trespassed boundaries. And as I watch the TV or scroll through the various news items- even though I sat at home, others who did not continued experiencing a holi that was not really very holy. These moments of collective celebration bring to light the broader implications of our actions and interactions. They serve as a microcosm for the larger picture of how we coexist in spaces that demand both unity and respect for individuality. My contemplation is driven by a belief that the principles guiding our actions in these seemingly trivial moments can, and do, spill over into the more significant aspects of our lives, including our professional conduct.

My aim is to speak directly to those of us navigating the complexities of diverse work environments, where the celebration of difference is often juxtaposed with the challenge of maintaining respect for individual boundaries. This reflection is sparked not only by the festivities of Holi, which, in its riot of colors, sometimes blurs the lines of consent, but also by the everyday moments that underscore the importance of understanding and respecting personal space and autonomy. I look at all these people - kids less and grown ups more and wonder how these humans behave in their workplaces!?

I am writing this for you—the colleague, the team leader, the new recruit, and the seasoned executive. I write in the hope that by sharing these reflections, we can collectively recognize personal boundaries not as formalities but as fundamental aspects of human dignity and respect.

Diving deep into what goes wrong and why- we all know people around us who are fighting for the boundaries which may not seem very big as an affair to your eyes. When Priya flinches from an unexpected touch, it's not just about the contact. It digs into her cultural and personal lines that, once crossed, can make her work space feel unwelcoming, almost alien. This small action reverberates through her work life, planting seeds of caution in what should be easy, collaborative moments. Do not tell Priya to be cool-er, tell yourself and the team to respect Priya's apprehensions. Then there's Alex, who feels out of place in compulsory team fun that's all about being outgoing and physically present. It's not just the awkwardness of the activities but the silent message they send—that his worth is tied to fitting into a mould that's just not him. This creates a rift between who he is and what his job seems to demand. Jai faces a different challenge; he is a private person who just does not understand why conversations about his personal life, his family, wife, kids, or even his travel have to be shared in teams. Can he not request everyone to respect the privacy that he wishes to maintain? But that is not happening- in fact, now labelled as a killjoy, and introvert, this is now possibly limiting his career opportunities and daily work interactions. Sana's hurt from a joke about her ethnic background, meant to be light-hearted, really underscores the fine line between humor and respect for who we are and where we come from. While the joke celebrates her community’s spirit of being money minded, it is now becoming insulting on the other aspects her community suppresses for the women. It's not just the joke that's the problem but the feeling of being called out, questioning her place in a team that's supposed to celebrate diversity.

All these stories aren't just about the incidents themselves but about the bigger picture—they show how vital it is for a workplace to not just talk about inclusion but to truly practice it by respecting everyone's individuality and boundaries. To include means not to put a spotlight on an individual different trait- to include means to give them space to be!

Why focus on such personal stories? Because behind every policy discussion, every DEI initiative, and every team-building exercise, there are individuals with their own stories, challenges, and boundaries. Recognizing and respecting these personal dimensions is crucial to creating an inclusive, equitable, and respectful work environment.

This reflection on consent and personal boundaries is more than just an academic or professional exercise; it's a call to introspect on our actions and their impact on the people around us. It's an invitation to align the values of empathy, respect, and dignity in every interaction, no matter how small or seemingly inconsequential.

In penning this casual note, my hope is that we can carry this consciousness into our professional spaces. After all, if we can practice understanding and respect in the joyous chaos of a festival, imagine the harmony we can achieve in the diversity of our workplaces. As we celebrate, let's also reflect on the power of our actions and the importance of consent and personal boundaries. Because, in the end, "the way we do one thing, we do everything," and it's in these everyday choices that we shape the culture of our shared spaces.