Feeling The Pressure? Three Tips For Setting Yourself Free
All pressure isn’t equal. My pressure isn’t your pressure and our pressures aren’t like, say, Lexi Thompson’s pressure. Therefore, how we respond to pressure shouldn’t always look the same. But it can look similar.
If you are a fan of professional golf, you probably know Lexi is one of the game’s best players. And her recent announcement that she is retiring from pro golf at the end of this season might seem shocking since she is 29 years old and arguably in the prime of her career.
Her reason? If I had to sum it up in a word it would pressure.
Lexi has played competitive golf for 17 years, including 12 years on the LPGA. She made history by qualifying for the U.S. Women’s Open in 2007 when she was only 12 years old, she’s a two-time Olympian, and she has won 11 times on the LPGA Tour with more than $14 million in lifetime earnings.
That’s a ton of success from a very young age, but it has come at a price.
“Although this has been an amazing journey,” she said in an Instagram post announcing her retirement, “it hasn’t always been an easy one. Since I was 12 years old, my life as a golfer has been a whirlwind of constant attention, scrutiny and pressure. The cameras are always on, capturing every swing and every moment on and off the golf course.”
Sue and I met Lexi about a year ago during a charity event and found her to be a delightful person. She has a much-deserved reputation for her kindness, patience, humility, and willingness to give back to fans, especially the throngs of autograph-seeking young girls who see her as a role model. She’s also been very open about the mental health challenges that come with being a high-profile athlete in the age of social media.
“I’ll be the last one to say, throw me a pity party,” she said. “That’s the last thing I want. We’re doing what we love. We’re trying the best every single day. You know, we’re not perfect. We’re humans. Words hurt. It’s hard to overcome sometimes.”
Personally, I hate that the LPGA is losing a great player but thrilled that she had the wisdom and courage to put her health above material success. Good for her!
I’ve never been a professional golfer, but like everyone else in the world, I have some experience with pressure. I’ve felt the pressure of a three-foot putt to win a golf match that would impact only a few people and wouldn’t matter at all in the grand scheme of things. I’ve felt the pressure of leading a global company on the brink of bankruptcy with the livelihoods of hundreds of employees on the line. And I’ve felt the pressure of holding a newborn baby in my arms and wondering how in the world I could be good enough as a father.
In my experience, pressure can feel like a steady drip that slowly wears you down or like a raging river that sweeps you away. It can be undeniably physical, like a crowd closing in on you, or intensely psychological, like, well, a crowd closing in on you.
When it hits you, pressure can make you physically ill or spur you to heroic achievements. Sometimes it can do both!
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But if all pressure isn’t equal, what can we learn from Lexi – and from each other – about dealing with the stress that come with life, especially with the life of anyone seeking high achievement and big influence?
I see at least three things from Lexi’s journey that ring true with my experiences and that I think apply universally.
Know your priorities
If you know what matters to you and why, it’s easier to identify the times when you should say no to opportunities, especially when they are good opportunities in general but not the right opportunities for you.
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Know your season
When I was named CEO of Prologis, the company was struggling and the pressure was intense. I knew I needed to sacrifice for a season to help the company survive, and I was OK with that. It was hard and I didn’t always deal with it well, but it was my choice to face it for that season.
Later, the demands of the job became overwhelming. I was working 70 to 80 hours a week and traveling about 80 percent of the time. My life felt out of control but, ironically, it was because of the demands I placed on myself, not demands from others. There was no one to blame but me. I concluded that I had accomplished what I wanted in business, and it was time to enter a new season.
Know your resources
No matter what our pressures look like we rarely can manage them alone. We need trusted advisors, perhaps even professional help, to develop the wisdom to make tough decisions – like when to step into a battle with unyielding determination and when to step aside and leave the fight to others. I am thankful for my friends, my family (especially my wife), and my God for being there when the pressure has been the greatest and helping me figure out the best path forward.
When you feel pressure, how should you respond? I don’t know the answer. It’s your pressure, not mine. But there’s a reality about pressure that we can never escape: It may change forms and degrees of intensity but it will never go away completely. Time is a depreciating asset, so the challenge is to make the most of it in each season of life. Know your priorities, know your season, and know your resources, and then face your pressures in the way that’s right for you.