Feeling the pressure of a bigger role? Some coaching notes x

Managing big projects, when you've been promoted can be a huge step up.

I thought these notes from a recent coaching session might be helpful to anyone who has a lot on at the moment.

We talked about behaviour and what is behind it.

Think. Feel. Do.

?Behind all behaviour (doing) is a thought and a feeling.? Most likely feelings come first, then thoughts then action. Apparently we feel 5 times faster than we think. it is reported that we feel at the speed of light. (Not sure how scientist have proved that!)

Thoughts come from the more advanced part of the brain (prefrontal cortex, which evolved later) – with language.

Feelings come from the more instinctive part of the brain (the limbic system).? This part does not have language, which is why it is hard to talk about what you feel.

The brain is 5 x faster at feeling than it is at thinking.? The trick to being more in control of how your life runs is to use the space between feeling and thinking.?

The best way to do this is to pause to breathe.

The most significant feeling we are driven by is FEAR.

Humans are designed to be afraid of threats.? Our brains are constantly looking to deal with threats – are we safe? It is on all the time.

Threats can be felt as if they are the same as a threat to life e.g. a wild animal is coming to attack us, or? a rival will steal our food etc. (Instinctive fears).

The brain reacts the same when dealing with more modern-day threats e.g. not meeting a deadline.

Fear can show up as:

·???????? Fear of loss of face

·???????? Fear of loss of reputation – what others think of you, loss of respect from peers, or your boss, or your customer

·???????? Afraid of not doing a? good enough job is a serious fear of loss.?

·???????? Loss of money for the company

·???????? Loss of bonus?

·???????? Loss of credibility

·???????? Loss of acceptance /fear of rejection

·???????? Fear of failure

·???????? Fear of success (i.e. not feeling worthy of it or being afraid of what it might mean to our lives if we are successful.? How will life be different?)

Fear drives us AWAY from things (risks)

Fear drives us towards things (hard work, results)

Stress at work can be a fear.

Motivation can be the same thing.

we might think: “I want people to know that I am good at my job”

This matters and it drives behaviours accordingly.?

What matters in your work now that you have much bigger projects under your direction?

1.???? Keeping the customers happy

What does this look like?

·???????? Being proactive

·???????? Being positive

·???????? Having good reasons for things if they do not go according to plan

·???????? Having the right evidence

·???????? Having solutions to situations

·???????? Communicating effectively (bad news is better than no news, keeping people in the loop)?

·???????? Providing good information is good way to keep people happy and it is a high-level skill

“It’s not what happens that matters when things go wrong, but how you deal with it that matters”

people need news even if it is bad news. Keep communicating.

WHAT I CAN DO IS………Such a helpful phrase….

“This is what we can do going forward…..”

Habits you have which will drive these good behaviours to manage bigger projects:

·???????? Checking the works programme regularly – making sure it is up to date

·???????? Being prepared for meetings - putting time in to the calendar to prepare properly – making sure this is in your calendar

What are the worst things you can do to mess up a project?

·???????? Keep people out of the loop

·???????? Have no information ready

·???????? Being late for things

·???????? Being disorganised

·???????? Moaning/whining

·???????? PEOPLE PLEASING?

Being promoted might lead to want to make everyone happy, which is a good quality.

(But saying yes to one thing means you are saying no to something else.)

There is an optimum amount of caring that provides the optimum amount of performance. Making sure the right levels are in place is key.? Knowing when pleasing too much will be destructive is important.

2.? Keeping your own team happy on the project

People need acknowledgement of good work.

In fact people like to be noticed even for poor standard work.? At least they are being noticed!?

·???????? Develop a good culture of feedback.

·???????? People like praise for work well done.? This has to be delivered properly.

·???????? People need CLEAR EXPECTATIONS set for them so that they know what good looks like.

·???????? People need the right resources to work effectively.? Planning is key.

3.??? Organisation

Manging projects is actually about managing your self and your time.

Keeping on top of emails every day so that they do not build up.? Taking action.

Always make notes of important things to remember.

Good habits around planning ahead.

Lots of good notes set out neatly and clearly. However – could a colour code help you? Can technology help you?

Keeping your daily diary up to date and planning ahead is vital.?

·Making ?% improvements will make a huge difference.? (It’s a gnat which bites you, not an elephant! It's all the little things)

Slow IS fast.? That means take time to be organised rather tan react without thinking.? Pause, take a breath engage the better part of the brain.

Learning new things is important.? A bit of reading to learn new stuff - what will you commit to?

4.???? Time management is managing yourself first!

Important is different to urgent.

Important means has consequences, has high value, it matters deeply.

Urgent means it has a short time frame.

People get mixed up.? Your skill is to understand what matters and what timeframe – in reality (not how it feels or how it feels to someone else!)

How it feels is sometimes different to how it is!

I – Crisis – is addictive “I’m good in a crisis” means “I love problems, because I think it make me look good to solve them”. Drama and adrenalin. Hero.

II – important but not urgent – PREVENTION, BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS, PLANNING AHEAD, BEING STRATEGIC, much better to dwell here.

The trouble is that, because there is no immediate deadline, these things get put off then they end up as urgent. Effective people put these type of things in the calendar and MAKE sure they happen to PREVENT a crisis.

III – usually a lack of planning, or a rush with no capacity, someone else’s hijacking your priorities.? “What I can do in the time is….” What shall I postpone which is important to cope with this urgent but not important thing?”. This is about training and priorities.?

IV Not your kind of work mostly.? Can you delegate?? Can you automate? Fit this in when you have? a few minutes of deadtime. ?Use this work to rest a bit if you must do it at all.

Focus on what is within your sphere of control mainly.

Control – can you take control or is it out of your control?

Influence – can you exert an influence? What effort/evidence is required to influence?

Accept – should you accept and move on?