Feeling Overwhelmed? Disrupt Your Status Quo Like Luvvie Ajayi Jones

Many people use the “clean slate” energy of the New Year to make resolutions that address their feelings of stress, but find themselves in February still feeling overwhelmed, rushed, and distracted. We may have tried meditating, started going to bed earlier, or reduced our caffeine consumption, but still aren’t feeling the benefits. Or we may have been caught in the cycle of being too overwhelmed to do anything about it in the first place.?

Research shows that by the end of February, many people have abandoned their New Year’s resolutions.

When a resolution isn’t working, this can be a sign that we haven’t properly identified the problem. There can be many sources of feelings of stress in our personal and professional lives and from the world. We may need to take a step back to identify the changes we need to make in order to be happier.

I talked to Luvvie Ajayi Jones , author of the New York Times bestselling book Professional Troublemaker , about her resolution to take a break from social media. Her experience is a perfect example of identifying the problem—in her case, thinking big with this one dramatic resolution allowed her to clear space, turn down the noise, and focus on her priorities.?

Here's what she had to say:

I decided to start the year off with a social media break accidentally. My birthday is January 5, and that day, I was reflecting on what I wanted my year to FEEL like. I wanted to usher in more peace and ease, centering myself and my well-being with deep intention.?

Although my work as a cultural voice and an author often looks like me showing up on these platforms, I decided to take a break from social media to hear my own voice again, and remove the major distractions of the information hyperloop. And it was incredible. The first day was hard because the habit of scrolling is so embedded. But day 2 and beyond were easy.?

What started as a 1 week break became a month, and in that month, I spent more moving my body, sleeping and rediscovering my love of reading. In fact, I started reading every night before bed, putting my phone away an hour before I fell asleep to dig into pages of the emotional support stack of books on my nightstand.?

I’m back on social media but I’m still keeping the habit of reading before bed. Also, I’m spending less time mindlessly scrolling, so I’m falling in less rabbit holes. My tendency is “Rebel” so I like to do what I wanna do, but often, I want to serve other people. This year, I’m choosing to serve self first and it began with me disrupting my own self and getting more quiet so I can get more settled.?

– Luvvie Ajayi Jones

What a terrific approach to the new year!

Luvvie's decision to ask herself how she wanted her year to feel is a brilliant know-yourself-better question. It's a question that we rarely ask ourselves, and it's very revealing.

Luvvie also approached her aim in a way that harnesses the Rebel Tendency , from my Four Tendencies framework.

• Rebels often enjoy a bold challenge: "They say I can't do it? Watch me!"
• They benefit from the Strategy of Identity . They don't do something because they "should" do it, or even because they said they'd do it: they do it because it's an expression of their values and identity.
• Rebels place a high value on freedom and choice, so "I refuse to be controlled by X" is a helpful way to frame an aim.

Luvvie used her birthday as a catalyst for reflection; we might also use "Determination Day" on February 28.

Research shows that by the end of February, many people have abandoned their New Year’s resolutions. We can use Determination Day as a time to re-evaluate, to do the hard work of asking ourselves, “If something isn’t working, why not? Have I identified the problem? Am I thinking big enough?”

Luvvie conducted her social media experiment in January, but if you’re rethinking your resolutions, Determination Day is a great time to start. If you too would like to do a social media hiatus, consider whether you’d like to go off social media completely (Abstainers might try this approach; Rebels may also find it compelling), limit it to a month-long experiment (Questioners may see all the benefits after trying it out), or set rules around time limits or days of the week you’d like to use it (good for Moderators and Upholders).

I’m eager to hear more from Luvvie in our upcoming LinkedIn Live on February 27th at 6:30 pm ET.

What revelations came from disrupting her status quo through this New Year’s resolution? How will she carry that into the future? And how is she using Determination Day to consider her aims? Join us for the conversation by RSVPing here.

If you like what Luvvie has to say, subscribe to her new LinkedIn Newsletter : The Troublemaker Tribune. Click here to read the first edition , and follow Luvvie for more.

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