Feeling Lost and Alone?

Introduction

The most powerful acknowledgment I have ever seen: “This book wouldn’t have been possible without my support"—to date, I have received no acknowledgment like this from any writer. But the opening of this book gives me a kick! And it clicked in my brain: wow, that is what I call "guts"!

Surprisingly, when I was reading this book, it gave me the feeling that someone had put my thoughts and inner voice on paper!

I won’t say that every line of this book was perfect, right, or anything like that, but yes, if any of you pass this phase of life, you will realize how relatable this book is to our daily circumstances.

So let’s jump into its wounds, which is what “RENUKA GAVRANI" is trying to say to us!

Redefining Loneliness

Why do we hate the idea of being with ourselves so much that “the time you spend with yourself is now considered loneliness”? Society's demand for acceptance—what a load of crap! What even is society if not a collection of individuals like you and me? Without us, there is no society. So why let societal judgments dictate how we live our lives?

Our lives have become a compilation of other people's thoughts and judgments. David Foster Wallace once said, “You'll stop worrying about what others think about you when you realize how seldom they do.” The biggest enemy and critic is no one else but you. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and thinking there’s something wrong with you that needs fixing. Loneliness is viewing yourself through a lens of sympathy and misery.

Stop Romanticizing Loneliness

One day, someone will come to save you, rescue you, or, rather, fall in love with you. But until then, know that your imagination shapes your reality. If you choose to believe that you are not enough to change your life all by yourself, you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Believing in perfect friends who will become a part of your soul is like creating a graveyard for your hopes.

The bitter truth is, after college, we rarely make new friends. If there’s anything crueler than death, it’s nurturing false hope only to see it crushed.

The Pain of Hiding Your True Self

The most painful and scariest thing in the world is looking in the mirror and not recognizing the person staring back at you. Loneliness is not about lacking people around you; it’s about not finding yourself within yourself. How can anyone accept you if you don’t accept yourself? In the race for acceptance and love, you end up losing yourself. Doing what genuinely makes you happy often seems old-school, but it's essential.

How to Be You?

1. Self-love starts with self-acceptance: Self-love isn't about bubble baths or expensive makeup. It’s about knowing yourself, accepting your flaws, and transforming them into strengths.
2. Self-love grows with self-knowledge: Your mind isn’t stupid, nor is it your enemy. The struggle is reading your own thoughts and understanding yourself. When you don’t know yourself, you accept the bare minimum from others. Free yourself from these limitations.

The Love of Solitude

You cannot be lonely if you like the person you are alone with. Women uplift each other, and we need each other more than men do. Society tricks us into believing that women are each other’s biggest enemies, but the truth is, we can be each other’s greatest allies. People come and go, but you are your own constant. Embrace that.

Practicing the Art of Being Alone

Focus is the new luxury. Your real guide is you. Detox your brain every day. Learn the art of getting bored—embrace "dolce far niente," the sweetness of doing nothing. Belong to yourself in a world where everyone seeks to belong to others.?

Turning Dark Loneliness into Growth

You are who you are, so why not embrace it? The only person missing from your side is you. We often become motivational speakers for others but fail to support ourselves. Embrace solitude as a period of growth, not as a dark tunnel.

Make a New Best Friend

The path to success can be lonely. Become friends with your goals, dreams, success, and achievements. Make your dreams your best buds. Embrace the journey and find companionship in your aspirations.

Building a Dream Life Plan

If you don’t know where you want to go, how will you ever get there? We often follow what society dictates, but it’s crucial to carve out your own path. Define your goals and build a plan to achieve your dream life.

Conclusion

"The Art of Being Alone" by Renuka Gavrani is a powerful exploration of solitude and self-acceptance. It challenges societal norms and encourages us to embrace our true selves. By redefining loneliness and focusing on self-love and self-knowledge, we can transform our alone time into a period of profound personal growth.

Last but not least, here are links from which you can get some extra information on this concept.?

1. 5 benefits of solitude and why you need it for your mental health
2. The Art of Alone: Intentional Solitude | Niqolas Ruud | TEDxWallaWallaUniversity