Feeling Good About Charity

This article is more personal than it is professional, but it has applicability in workplace. I’m a firm believer in that you must always be your true self, whether you are at home or in the office. Being open is crucial to building trust with your manager, peers, and team members, so this article in part is about showing others more about how I think about the world, and more importantly, how there are always opportunities to grow as a person.

With spring now in full bloom, that means the lawn needs cutting, which is prime podcast listening time for me. It has been a while since I have had a good bit of time alone to be able to listen to a podcast, so I was excited when I found there was a new podcast for the creators of Serial - The Trojan Horse Affair.

While the podcast is fantastic (seriously, go listen to it), the situation being investigated, while intriguing and essential in the discourse of society today, is not so important in the context of this writing. However, one specific interview from the first episode stuck with me because it prompted me to do something I usually never would have done.

In the interview, two former students discussed a specific assembly where they were learning about charity. The student remarked, "talking about charity, and they say, when you're giving charity, put your hand in your pocket and take out — don't care how much you give in. Just put it in. Don't count what you're giving and what you have left because when you give, you receive tenfold." I remember thinking about the times I've neglected to reach into my own pocket for reasons I'm sure were never very good, but the thought was fleeting and I went on listening to the podcast.

On Sunday I had to run a few errands. Since no one in the family wanted to come, I eventually found myself in a warehouse store alone, flitting about as I waded through shoppers, oversized carts, and giant bags of pita chips. I needed to get the most typical of big store purchases - paper towels and toilet paper - but in the worst stroke of luck, the store had that aisle closed down for restocking, so instead of pallets full of paper goods, I was greeted with a wall of people.

Thankfully, the workers put some of the supplies from those aisles where people could get them. Still, an older woman in front of me was growing frustrated as she couldn't wade through the masses to get anything. I looked at her, touched her lightly on her back, and said, "ma'am, can I help you get something?" She quickly replied, "oh, yes please, some of the Deer Park water." So I made my way to the front, waited for a few minutes, and scored a case of water for her. I gave all the workers a huge thanks and thanked them for making it easy for everyone to get what they needed, I loaded up the woman's cart, got the stuff I needed, and then made my way to the checkout.

At the checkout, I had the unfortunate luck of getting in line behind a family trying to buy a display model of something, which slowed down the typically speedy checkout process. Her youngest son, about 4 or 5, was still sitting in the cart on the opposite side of the cashier, having a ball. You could hear his laugh from 5 miles away, and everyone around him was smiling and laughing with him. I have no idea why he was so happy or what he found so funny, but that brief moment of watching him enjoy life was precious and uplifting.

I finally got my chance to check out, and my stomach was telling me it was time for some warehouse store food, so I made my way to grab a hot dog. The stand was a bit busy, and once I got my food, there was a queue at the soda machine as a family of four was getting drinks, and an older gentleman was struggling with the ice dispenser. I noticed one of the warehouse workers in his orange vest also waiting, checking his phone nervously. When a spot opened up, I said, "Hey, get your drink. I'm sure you don't get a ton of time for lunch, so every second counts." He shot me a huge smile and said, "Thanks! And yeah, 30 minutes flies by really quickly. I wish we could get 45-minutes." He got his drink, I got mine, and we went our separate ways.

None of these events were all that noteworthy. I tend to be polite, I will hold open doors, and I've returned more than one shopping cart for someone as I was walking into a store. However, it was the next event that was different.

As I left the store and drove toward the main intersection, I saw a panhandler. In between bites of my hot dog, I grabbed a few dollars from my wallet, offered them to him, and then rolled up my window without too much of a thought. That action alone was a little abnormal for me, but it was at that moment that the words of the student came back. "Don't count what you're giving and what you have left because when you give, you receive tenfold." I grabbed my wallet again, grabbed all the cash I had (I'm still not sure how much it was), and gave it to the panhandler. I asked the panhandler, "Hey, what's your name?"

"Jimmy."

"Hey Jimmy, I'm Bryan. Hopefully, you can use this for something good, maybe get something to eat."

"Of course. God bless you and say a prayer for me because I just said one for you.

Underneath Jimmy's ball cap, weathered skin, and gray beard, I caught what I thought was a little bit of a smile. I smiled back, told him that I would say a prayer for him, and then I left.

The point here isn't to extol my virtues. I'm no saint, and while I can be polite and cordial, I could do a lot more good daily. However, today was different. As I drove home, I kept thinking repeatedly, "when you give, you receive tenfold." I thought through all my interactions of the day. Helping the woman with a case of water. Watching a child laugh and enjoy life. Giving someone a few extra seconds in their day. Offering a few dollars and recognizing someone standing in front of you. Because of those things, I was smiling, feeling good, and feeling fulfilled. The smiles I gave lasted me well more than tenfold the time it took to give them.

I've always shied away from feeling good about charity in the past. For some reason, I've always thought you were supposed to be humble in your giving since it's both a moral and societal obligation. However, today I realized that approach is why charity seems so hard. We need to allow ourselves to feel good when we give. We shouldn't be ashamed of those feelings when we help others because those positive vibes encourage us to do more. For me, I think the statement from the interview did nestle its way into my subconscious, and that gave me a little extra prompt to be helpful.?However, that little nudge, slight as it may have been, increased after each positive action, and it led to me engaging with another person to whom I probably would not normally speak. While the exchange was brief, it was filled with kindness, a few smiles, and well wishes for one another.

Next time you're out, keep those words in your mind, "when you give, you receive tenfold." Try it out. Do something good, help someone, and allow yourself to feel good for doing it. Then, do it again. I'm pretty sure your day, week, or year will be better because of it.