Feeling Confused? Don't Stay Stuck!
Amanda Parker
Learn how to tap into your intuition and align who you are with what you do in the world. Intuition Training, Intuitive Healing, 1:1 Coaching ?? Podcast Host → Don't Step on the Bluebells ??
One of the most common things I hear from my clients is that they feel confused about what they’re meant to do next. In fact, it’s a common feeling that’s been circulating the airwaves around me for the last couple of years.
This question implies that you have a specific identity or purpose and that if you could only figure out exactly what it was and what you were meant to be doing to reach it, you could stop doing the thing you’re doing now and get on with it.
A Sense of Purpose
We want to feel a sense of purpose. We want to be motivated by something bigger than ourselves. And it’s much easier to assume that there is something already written for us, if we could only figure out what that thing is!
The truth is, however, that while we are each born with talents and gifts unique only to us, our destiny is truly in our own hands. Sure, you might be in a totally wrong fit job or in a situation where your income doesn’t match the lifestyle you desire, or any other number of things that feel off – but I am here to tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt, there is nothing you are supposed to be doing with your life.
You're in the Driver's Seat
You, my friend, are 100% sovereign. You get to choose what your life looks like, and you also get to choose if you are happy about that or not.
If you’re currently in a job or running a business that isn’t working for you – say the money isn’t great, the clients are annoying you, or you can’t stand another strategy meeting with your business partner, it’s time for you to look inside and see what it is that would feel more fulfilling and engaging to you. If you’re currently out of work and contemplating what’s next – you get to choose what you want to try out, or where to send your CV, regardless of any pre-ordained path.
The Pain is Real
If I sound cynical, believe me that’s not how I feel. Quite the opposite. The pain of feeling confused and not knowing the path forward is real. I’ve felt it before myself on many occasions, and my heart breaks for those I support who are struggling with it right now. It’s a hard place to be in – to feel like you haven’t quite found your place in the world and you don’t know what you’re meant to be doing.
The problem is that when that line of thinking begins to overtake your day-to-day thoughts rather than breeding clarity and confidence in your purpose and what you want, it does the exact opposite – it breeds more uncertainty, confusion, and overwhelm.
Your Brilliance Shines Through the Fog
The people I work with are brilliant. They are driven, motivated, talented, and curious. These are the folks who truly get shit done in the world. If they find a mission worth pursuing, there is literally nothing that can stand in the way of them reaching their target.
That’s why feeling mission-less can be so daunting. The good news is, it is truly all in your hands. It starts with a simple shift in perspective, rather than repeating the mantra “I am stuck.” “I am lost.” “I am confused.” “I don’t know what to do next.” Which will surely reinforce itself more strongly as a fact everytime it leaves your mouth (or gets written on the page of your journal) try to shift the way you see your current situation.
Treat Life as a Playground
Start to look at where you are as a playground, a place where you get to choose something new for yourself. Rather than being “stuck” consider if you are simply seeking out the next opportunity and haven’t quite found the thing that lights you up yet. Or if you are feeling confused about the right path forward, make a decision in favor of one path or another. Don’t worry about getting it “right” or “wrong” (those are false narratives anyway as everything you do will ultimately lead you to more clarity in the end!) Choose and act. Be decisive. Don’t dwell in uncertainty longer than you need to or you will surely feel less certain than ever before.
A personal story: When I was contemplating launching my podcast, I spent a lot of time in reflection - what did I want it to be about, who did I want to speak to, what format made sense to me? I had so many assumptions that I was afraid to launch! Then I finally scheduled my first guest...and had no choice but to bring the idea to life. The conversations didn't follow a script and I had to release many of my original assumption - assumptions that just don’t fit the reality. But 9 months later, I feel confident about what I'm creating. Something I couldn’t have told you before I began.
Sometimes you just need to make a choice, to act on it, and to let it be less than stellar (or worst case, let it be f*cking amazing) as you gain more traction, clarity, and a sense of direction on the path ahead.
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Take a Stand
With decisiveness and committing to something we are putting a stake in the ground. We are willing to put ourselves forward, even before we know if it will pay off – and I know from personal experience just how scary that can be. And yet, it is truly the quickest way to move from “stuck” to action. And believe me, when your wheels are churning in the mud unable to get a grip and pull yourself out from any direction, taking action in any direction at all will start to ease up that confusion and help you regain a sense of self and feeling of confidence in who you truly know yourself to be.
We come to know ourselves through how we show up in the world, how we take a stand for what we care about and the creations that we make. Now I’m not saying you can only know yourself through outward accolades, typically I preach quite the opposite ;-) But I am saying that for those of us who tend towards introspection and deep reflection we can get lost in a tunnel of our own thoughts finding fewer and fewer pathways out of it.
Take the First Step
If this resonates, and you find yourself feeling confused or wishing you had a simple answer for “what’s next” or “what I’m meant to be doing” trust me on this one, commit to make a decision and try it out for a period of time (a time frame I like to work with is 90 days – it’s a definite commitment, but still a short enough amount of time that if something really isn’t working you’ve got the chance to step out gracefully before too much time has past.) Give yourself the opportunity to fully pour yourself in, to see what you start to understand about yourself and your desires, and see what clarity comes forth as a result.
I invite you to take those bold steps forward. To make one decision today that will shift everything in your life away from stuckness and uncertainty and move you towards deeper understanding and wisdom.
Just one decision that will ultimately push the needle forward for you.
Let Me Help
And, as always, if you're truly unable to figure out where to begin, hit reply and let me know where you're stuck. We'll find time for a conversation and see how we can move you forward, even just one pace, towards clarity.
I’ll be opening up a few slots to work with me in a shorter, more intensive format over the course of 3 months – something I’m testing for those of you in a transition phase who just need to pull out the other side. If you'd like personalized support to gain clarity on your next steps, reply to this email and I'll share all the details.
Sending you so much love on this beautiful Saturday.
Amanda
PLUS, When you're ready to discover more of who you really are, here's 2 powerful ways I can support you right now.
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