The Feedback Trap: Why Compliment Sandwiches Fail and How Radical Truths Build Stronger Teams

Most leaders in the workplace today sugarcoat feedback, rendering it ineffective. 59% of employees say the feedback they get doesn’t help them improve.?

Why??

Because too many leaders are trying to avoid discomfort, relying on the outdated "compliment sandwich" approach, where praise cushions criticism.

I get it—giving direct feedback is uncomfortable. It feels easier to cushion criticism with praise. But if your team isn’t getting the clarity they need to grow, you’re holding them back. Leaders can’t afford to prioritize comfort over progress in today's fast-paced world. Radical, honest feedback—delivered with empathy—sparks real growth.

Moving from Compliment Sandwiches to Radical Truths

For years, the "compliment sandwich" has been a go-to method for delivering feedback: start with something positive, insert constructive criticism in the middle, and close with another round of praise. On the surface, it feels like a diplomatic way to communicate.?

But the reality? It’s not working.

When you cushion criticism with excessive praise, you dilute the message. Employees often walk away, remembering only the compliments and missing the actionable part of the conversation. Worse, they may start perceiving your praise as disingenuous, eroding trust—and without trust, even the most well-intentioned feedback falls flat.

Leaders turn to this method because it feels safer. But safety doesn’t drive change. If you aim for growth, you need a more direct, transparent, and objective approach that doesn’t contradict the truth. Employees don’t want mixed messages. They want to know what they’re doing well, what they need to improve, and how they can take meaningful action.

Why the Compliment Sandwich Fails

The compliment sandwich fails at its core because it sends a mixed signal. The positive remarks overshadow the critical feedback, leaving employees needing clarification on what needs improvement. Even worse, this approach can undermine your leadership credibility. When your praise feels obligatory, employees doubt whether your positive feedback is genuine—or just a prelude to criticism.

Conversely, leaders often use this method to avoid confrontation, worrying that direct feedback will damage relationships or demotivate their team. However, studies consistently show that employees crave straightforward feedback. They want to know where they stand and appreciate leaders who trust them enough to be upfront.

The goal of feedback is growth, not comfort. Growth requires clarity, and clarity sometimes means having tough, direct conversations that push your team to improve, not just feel good in the moment.

But clarity isn’t about criticizing for the sake of it. It’s about helping your team see where they can grow without judgment and showing them you’re invested in their success. Delivering feedback with empathy becomes a tool for development, not a source of frustration.

How to Transition to Radical Truths

Radical truth-telling is about being direct, straightforward, and empathetic. It’s not about being harsh but about giving actionable growth-focused feedback.

1. Be Specific Vague feedback is one of the most significant barriers to improvement. Instead of saying, “You need to communicate better,” be precise: “In the last team meeting, you interrupted your colleague multiple times, which disrupted the flow of ideas. Let’s work on listening more collaboratively.” Specific feedback ensures clarity and leaves no room for misinterpretation.
2. Create a Growth-Oriented Dialogue Frame feedback as an opportunity for improvement, not criticism. This makes the conversation more constructive and less confrontational. Ask, “How can we support you in this area?” or “What tools or resources would help you achieve better outcomes?” This way, feedback becomes a joint effort toward growth rather than a one-sided critique.
3. Acknowledge the Challenge with Empathy Providing difficult feedback doesn’t mean you need to be cold or detached. Acknowledge that the conversation may be challenging: “I know this might be hard to hear, but I’m sharing this because I believe it will help you grow in your role.” This approach builds trust and shows your team that you’re not just pointing out issues—you’re invested in their development.

Leaders can foster a culture of growth and accountability by shifting away from the compliment sandwich and embracing radical truth-telling. Employees appreciate direct, actionable feedback when it’s delivered with care and empathy. Though this shift may initially feel uncomfortable, it ultimately leads to stronger teams and better performance in the long run.

Reflections: As leaders, it’s easy to fall back on outdated methods like the compliment sandwich, thinking it preserves relationships or softens the blow. But your team can’t grow on vague or mixed feedback. Embracing radical truth-telling means giving your people the clarity they need to excel without losing the empathy that builds trust. When upfront, leaders cultivate teams that perform better, communicate openly, and take actual ownership of their development.

Ask yourself: Are you ready to lead truthfully and empower your team to reach their full potential?

Ready to transform the way you lead? Whether you want to overhaul your feedback approach or elevate your leadership strategy, I’m here to help. Sign up for my leadership development programs to discover actionable strategies that drive growth, transparency, and trust within your team. Let’s work together to create a feedback culture that empowers your people and speeds up results.

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