A feedback system - why it will never work?

January brings a new year and new momentum. And yeeees, new feedback requests. Just arrived in your inbox are feedback requests about three of your peers. One, Linda, whom you haven’t seen since COVID, one, Robert, whom you dislike from the first project you worked on together, and one, Jason, who is your closest work buddy.

Let's go through them one by one and discuss what feedback you will send to the official feedback system.

First up, Linda.

You have vague memories of her smile and her eagerness to help, whether needed or not. Let's set that aside and move on to Robert.

He's a real climber, stepping on anyone in his way, be it you or your boss. He wouldn't hesitate to undermine others to get ahead. You worked together a lot last year, learning day by day how to avoid any conflict. They play squash together with one of the real influencers in your team, so you know better than to write anything negative in his feedback sheet. Not in this world.

So, you take two deep breaths and write two paragraphs about his always responsive behavior. This is technically true if you overlook the nature of his responses.

As soon as you've filled out the official form and reached the minimum character count, you save it and start praying that you're not condemned for lying. You definitely don't want to spend an eternity with him in the afterlife.

Back to Linda? Still no clear memories. Let's proceed with Jason then, your favorite work buddy. You've been sharing lunches since 2009. Maybe it's time to refresh your LinkedIn profile as well. But how do you give feedback to him? He's the funniest person you know. True, there hasn't been a meeting in the last decade and a half that he's scheduled or that hasn't been rescheduled at least once. But you'll never put that in writing, as it's embarrassing for you as well, not just for the rest of your team. So, you continue your 'feedback', which will be partially true. Fun to work with, clever, cooperative, easy-going. Indeed, it's hard to imagine how much easier it could be.

Jason is already calling for lunch, and the feedback deadline is looming. You quickly write 150 words about Linda. 'Cross-functional cooperation master, quick to smile, does everything to move projects forward,' and so on. All the typical corporate jargon. Save. Submit.

Is this a familiar situation?

And why do we do it? Because it's a must, right?

No, it's not.

Is there a culture of meaningful feedback?

Yes, there is.

But is there any organization where an official feedback system has solved anything?

No, there isn't.

You have just received three feedback requests, each reflecting a totally different working relationship, and you have just managed to lie in three different ways. Now, let's check what kind of feedback you have just received from Patrick. Hope you will like them :D

So, please. Close the system, and go to have lunch with Jason and discuss his attitude towards meetings. Maybe call Linda and ask why she chose you for feedback. Then you'll surely receive some in return.

And Robert?

Just avoid him, as you've learned to do.

Giving feedback doesn't mean you have to like everyone, whether it's written in the system or not.

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