Fear No More: How to Overcome the Fear of Starting.

The Fear of Starting: Starting something new can be a daunting experience…

…and it's not uncommon to feel anxious or overwhelmed by the prospect. I’m guessing that we have probably ALL been there at one point or another. Possibly multiple times.

Whether it's starting a new job, beginning a new project, trying to create a new habit or even starting a conversation with someone new, the fear of starting can be a significant barrier to personal and professional growth.

In this article, we will explore the fear of starting. Its negative consequences and provide practical strategies to help readers overcome this fear.

The Fear of Starting is a really common experience.

The fear of starting is a common experience. It can prevent us from taking action towards achieving our goals.

It's a type of anxiety that arises from the uncertainty of a new situation and the fear of failure.

Those of us who experience this fear often procrastinate or avoid taking action. This can lead to missed opportunities, decreased self-esteem, and a sense of unfulfillment. The negative consequences of the fear of starting can be significant. It can limit personal and professional growth, reduce creativity, and lead to missed opportunities.

I thought I’d write this article to help you to overcome this fear.

By writing this article, I hope to help you to overcome your fear of starting by providing practical strategies that can be implemented immediately. The article will focus on strategies that can help you to break down your goals into manageable steps, develop a support system, and engage in self-care practices that support personal growth.

I hope that the practical advice and actionable steps I share with you will help you to simply just start. Just start to overcome your fear of starting and take action towards achieving your goals.

In the next sections, I’ll explore the fear of starting in more depth and provide strategies to overcome it. So, let’s begin by defining the fear of starting and its negative consequences.

Understanding the Fear of Starting.

So. What are the common causes of fear of starting?

The fear of starting is a very common experience that can prevent us from taking action towards achieving our goals.

It's a kind of anxiety that arises from the uncertainty of a new situation and the fear of failure.

While the fear of starting can show up in different ways. It often involves a sense of overwhelm, perfectionism, and self-doubt. In this section, I’ll talk about some of the common causes and types of fear of starting. I’ll also touch on the negative impact it can have on personal and professional growth.

Are there different types of fear of starting?

I’m glad you asked that! Indeed there are. Here’s a few types that can affect us….

The Fear of Failure

One of the most common causes of the fear of starting is the fear of failure. Probably most of us can put our hands up to this one, can’t we?! I know I can.

People who experience this fear often believe that if they fail, they will be judged negatively by others or that it will confirm their self-doubt. This fear can be rooted in past experiences of failure, criticism, or rejection, and it can be difficult to overcome without the right support.

When you think about it, this one makes a huge amount of sense. It is rooted in our survival as humans. Back in the day when we were living in caves and chasing wildebeest, it was vital that we kept together as a tribe for our survival. Being rejected by the tribe meant being an outcast in the wilderness and our chances of survival became a whole lot slimmer.

It’s not quite the same today. At least not in the many parts of the World. But psychologically, we still want, and need, to be part of an accepting group of people. Our mental health often suffers when we feel rejected. Others being judgemental of us feels very emotionally painful to us.

The Fear of Rejection

Fear of rejection is another common reason why people are afraid to start anything new. This fear can stem from childhood experiences of rejection or past failures. It can cause us to avoid taking risks and putting themselves in vulnerable situations.

The fear of rejection can be paralysing, leading to feelings of worthlessness and low self-esteem. It can also prevent us from pursuing opportunities, both personally and professionally. For example, a fear of rejection may prevent us from asking someone out on a date or from applying for a job we really want.

As I said in the ‘Fear of Failure’ above, rejection is hardwired into us through evolution as something we want to avoid at all costs. But in today’s modern world, this is less appropriate than it was when rejection could literally mean a life or death situation. It is pretty rare for that to be true for us today.

Part of the way that we can overcome the fear of rejection is to recognise that rejection is a natural part of life and that it happens to everyone. Reframing rejection as an opportunity for growth and learning can help shift one's perspective and reduce the fear associated with it.

The Fear of Success

The fear of success is a common but often overlooked cause of the fear of starting.

I know. This one is a surprise, isn’t it?!

Most of us assume that the fear of starting is solely driven by a fear of failure, but the fear of success can be just as debilitating. This fear can manifest in various ways, such as a fear of increased responsibilities or the pressure to maintain a certain level of success.

One of the reasons why the fear of success can be so paralysing is because of the expectations that come with success. Both our own and those of others. Success often brings with it increased attention, scrutiny, and pressure to maintain that success. We can easily see how these external expectations on people can play out in the way that the media often portrays ‘celebrities’. One minute they are on a high pedestal and the next minute they may be the butt of jokes and worse.

For some of us, this fear can create feelings of anxiety and self-doubt, leading us to question ourselves. Questioning whether we are truly capable of handling the potentially increased and additional responsibilities that may come with success.

Another element that contributes to the fear of success is the fear of change. Success often brings about changes in one's life, such as a new job, a new lifestyle, or a new social circle. For some, these changes can feel overwhelming, particularly for those who are comfortable with their current situation.

Perfectionism

Another cause of the fear of starting is perfectionism. Perfectionism is a fear of not being good enough, which can manifest as a fear of starting anything at all. This fear can stem from the belief that anything less than perfect is not worth pursuing, or that making mistakes will lead to failure and disappointment.

It can be a major obstacle in starting anything new. While striving for excellence is admirable, aiming for perfection can simply be paralysing. People who struggle with perfectionism often have very high standards and fear that anything less than perfect will be a failure. This can then lead to procrastination, self-doubt, and ultimately not doing anything at all.

Perfectionism can also lead to a fear of criticism and judgment from others. Those who have perfectionist tendencies may believe that if they make even the slightest mistake, they will be seen as incompetent or inadequate.

This fear of being judged can be so overwhelming that they avoid starting anything at all.

As you may be able to see, one of the main problems with perfectionism is that it is unattainable. Perfection does not exist, and striving for it can be an exhausting and never-ending cycle. Additionally, it can also lead to a lack

of progress. A perfectionist may spend an excessive amount of time on minor

details thereby avoiding the thing which is really worrying them. But instead

of making progress towards their goal they continue on the exhausting treadmill

of perfectionism.

The Fear of the Unknown

The fear of the unknown is another common cause of the fear of starting. The fear of the unknown can be incapacitating and prevent us from taking action or pursuing our goals. Those of us who experience this fear often struggle with uncertainty and ambiguity.

We may feel overwhelmed by the thought of not knowing what to expect. This type of fear can be particularly challenging because it's often difficult to control or predict the outcomes of a new situation.

This fear often arises from a lack of information or experience, which can lead on to feelings of uncertainty and anxiety. The unknown can be daunting and overwhelming for most people, but it is important to remember that everyone experiences it at some point in their lives.

It is natural for the brain to seek out patterns and familiarity. These provide us with a sense of safety and security. However, when faced with the unknown, the brain can become hyperactive and go into overdrive. It can create worst-case scenarios and negative outcomes. The end result can be ‘analysis paralysis’, where we get stuck in a cycle of overthinking and indecisiveness.

The negative impact of the fear of starting on personal and professional growth.

The negative impact of the fear of starting on personal and professional growth can be significant. People who experience this fear often miss out on opportunities for growth, development, and learning. They can feel stuck or stagnant in their personal or professional lives, which can lead to a sense of unfulfillment and dissatisfaction. Additionally, the fear of starting can limit creativity and innovation, as individuals may avoid taking risks or trying new things.

The fear of starting can also have an impact on mental health. People who experience this fear may struggle with feelings of anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem. They may also experience physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, or fatigue.

It's important for anyone who experiences any of this, to recognise the negative impact of the fear of starting and to take steps to overcome it. In the next section, I’ll explore practical strategies to help you to overcome your fear of starting and take action towards achieving your goals.

Strategies to Overcome Fear of Starting

Overcoming the fear of starting can be a challenging process, but it is possible with the right mindset and strategies. In this section, we will discuss practical techniques to help readers overcome their fear of starting and take action towards their goals.

Identify the root cause of the fear.

Identifying the root cause of the fear of starting can be a challenging task. But, if we are to get ourselves out of that fear spiral, it is an essential step towards overcoming it.

One way to approach this is to reflect on past experiences and ask questions such as, "What happened in the past that made me fearful of starting something new?". Or "What are the underlying beliefs or assumptions that are holding me back?". Becoming aware of our non-conscious values and self-limiting beliefs are crucial early steps in understanding ourselves. And, from there, developing better thinking and behavioural habits to overcome our fears.

Reframing Negative Thoughts.

Once the root cause of the fear is identified, it's time to reframe our negative thoughts that are contributing to the fear.

Negative self-talk, self-doubt, and self-limiting beliefs can all be major obstacles in overcoming the fear of starting. Reframing negative thoughts involves replacing them with positive, empowering thoughts. These help to re-develop our inner self and shift beliefs towards those which are more realistic, helpful and positive.

Positive Affirmations

One technique for reframing negative thoughts is to use positive affirmations.

Errrr.. What ARE affirmations?

OK. So here goes. Affirmations are powerful statements that can help to increase confidence, reduce anxiety, and improve overall well-being. Now that sounds good doesn’t it!

Affirmations are statements that are repeated to ourselves either aloud or silently. By repeating affirmations regularly, they can help to develop our inner self and shift limiting beliefs.

For example, if someone is afraid of starting a new business, they could use affirmations such as "I am capable of succeeding in my new business" or "I have the skills and resources I need to start and grow my business." Affirmations are best personalised to address the specific fears or concerns of you. It is important to choose affirmations that resonate with you and feel authentic to your situation.

Cognitive Restructuring

Another technique for reframing negative thoughts is cognitive restructuring (I’ve talked about that in this article previously). This involves challenging and replacing negative thoughts with more realistic and positive ones.

For example, if someone has a negative thought such as "I'll never be successful," they can challenge it by asking themselves:

·      "Is this thought true?" and

·      "What evidence do I have that supports or contradicts this thought?"

They can then replace the negative thought with a more positive and realistic one. Such as "I may face challenges, but I have the skills and resilience to overcome them."

Overall, reframing negative thoughts takes practice and consistency. By identifying the root cause of the fear of starting and reframing negative thoughts, you can shift your beliefs and increase your confidence in your ability to take on new challenges.

Breaking down goals into manageable steps.

Breaking down goals into manageable steps is a key strategy in overcoming the fear of starting. When we have big goals or projects, they can seem overwhelming and insurmountable. This can cause us to procrastinate or avoid starting altogether. By breaking them down into smaller, more achievable steps, we can make progress towards our goals. This helps us to reduce feeling overwhelmed or anxious.

The importance of breaking down goals into manageable steps and taking action.

One way we can do this is to create a plan or roadmap for achieving our goals. This can involve setting realistic deadlines for each step. We can then identify any resources or support we may need along the way. It can also be helpful to prioritize the most important or urgent steps. This is so that we can focus our energy on the things that will have the biggest impact.

Celebrating small successes along the way is also important ??. This can help to boost our confidence and motivation, and make the process of achieving our goals more enjoyable. It's important to acknowledge the progress we've made, even if we haven't yet achieved our ultimate goal.

Take action.

Taking action is another crucial step in overcoming the fear of starting. Procrastination and indecision can feed our anxiety and fear, while taking action can help to build confidence momentum. Even small actions can make a big difference in overcoming the fear of starting. For example, if someone is afraid of starting a new business, they could start by doing some research or reaching out to a mentor for advice.

Each small action builds on the last, and before we know it, we've made significant progress towards our goal.

It's important to remember that the fear of starting is a common experience, and it's okay to feel afraid or anxious at times. The key is to not let fear hold us back from pursuing our goals and dreams.

By breaking down our goals into manageable steps, taking action, and celebrating small successes along the way, we can overcome the fear of starting and achieve great things.

Seek support and practice self-care.

Another good strategy for overcoming the fear of starting is seeking support and practicing self-care.

It is important to surround ourselves with positive and supportive people who believe in our abilities and goals. If we think about this, it seems logical doesn’t it? We know in our hearts how difficult it is to be positive when those around us are often negative and critical about us and the world.

Support can come in the form of a mentor, coach, therapist, or even supportive friends and family. It is essential to seek out people who can provide guidance, feedback, and encouragement throughout the process of starting something new. So choose wisely, perhaps gently reduce your contact with those who don’t create good in your life. More difficult to do with family and friends and even colleagues, I know. So perhaps try to find ways you can minimise their impact.

Self Care

In addition to seeking support, practicing self-care is also crucial in overcoming the fear of starting.

Self-care involves engaging in activities that promote physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Taking care of yourself can help to reduce anxiety and stress, boost self-confidence, and increase overall resilience. Some self-care activities include meditation, exercise, healthy eating, getting enough rest, and doing things that bring joy and relaxation. Maybe give this idea of self-care some thought. What do YOU enjoy doing that helps you to relax and give yourself some peace and joy?

When starting something new, it can be easy to neglect self-care and prioritise the task at hand. But. It is really important to remember that taking care of yourself is essential for personal and professional growth. You are worth it! Neglecting self-care can lead to burnout, decreased motivation, and even physical illness. And we don’t want that do we?

Making self-care a priority can help in overcoming the fear of starting and ensure your long-term success.

Overcoming the fear of starting can be challenging…

…at times but it is achievable with the right mindset and strategies.

Identifying the root cause of fear and reframing negative thoughts, breaking down goals into manageable steps, taking action, seeking support, and practicing self-care are all effective ways to overcome the fear of starting. It is important to remember that starting something new can be an exciting and rewarding experience. By taking small steps over time towards your goals, you are much more likely to achieve significant progress and growth.

Applying these strategies in real-life situations!

So. We’ve talked about various strategies for overcoming the fear of starting. It can be easy to read about these strategies and understand their importance. But then we need to actually implement them.

To help you along your way……

Tips for applying these strategies in real life:

1.    First, identify a specific area of your life where you are struggling to start or take action. It could be a new project at work, starting a fitness routine, losing weight, or even something as simple as decluttering your home. All kinds of things!

2.    Once you have identified the area, use the strategies we have discussed to create a plan of action. For example, if your fear of failure is holding you back from starting a new business, use positive affirmations to reframe your negative thoughts.

3.    Break down your goals into manageable steps, such as researching your target market, creating a business plan, and finding funding.

4.    Take action by starting with one small step, such as reaching out to a mentor or doing some initial market research.

5.    It is also important to seek support and practice self-care as you work towards overcoming your fear of starting. Reach out to a trusted friend or family member for encouragement and accountability. Consider working with a coach or therapist to help you work through any underlying fears or anxieties. And don't forget to prioritize self-care by making time for activities that promote your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.

Remember, overcoming the fear of starting is not a one-time event, but a process. It is important to be patient and kind to yourself as you work towards your goals. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small they may be, and use any setbacks as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Success Stories.

To help you stay motivated and inspired, here are some success stories of people who have overcome their fear of starting:

·       Sara was terrified of public speaking but knew that it was holding her back in her career. She used positive affirmations to reframe her negative thoughts and joined a local Toastmasters group to practice speaking in front of others. With time and practice, she became a confident and skilled public speaker.

·       John had always dreamed of running a marathon but was too intimidated to even start training. He broke down his goal into manageable steps, starting with short runs and gradually increasing his mileage. He also joined a local running group for support and accountability. After months of training, he successfully completed his first marathon.

·       Rachel had been wanting to start her own business for years but was afraid of the financial risks involved. She used positive affirmations to reframe her negative thoughts and worked with a business coach to create a solid business plan. She also reached out to friends and family for support and encouragement. Today, her business is thriving and she is grateful that she didn't let her fear hold her back.

·       Emily had got to the point where her weight was worrying her. She had tried many ‘diets’ over the years but had always found herself drifting back to her old habitual way of eating. She knew that her long term health could be seriously impacted by this. She sought support from a hypnotherapist to help her develop a more focussed mindset. She also found support from her family and friends as her cheerleaders. After a number of months she is now well on her way to her goal of a healthier lifestyle and a shape she is happy with.

By applying the strategies I’ve shared with you and staying committed to your goals, you too can overcome your fear of starting.

You too can achieve success in whatever areas of your life you choose to pursue.

FAQ - Common questions about the Fear of Starting:

·       Q: What causes the fear of starting? A: The fear of starting can have many different causes. These can include the fear of failure, a fear of success, a fear of the unknown, and fear of judgment. It can also be related to anxiety, low self-esteem, or past negative experiences.

·       Q: How can I overcome my fear of starting? A: Overcoming the fear of starting requires: Identifying the root cause of the fear. Reframing negative thoughts. Breaking down goals into manageable steps. Taking action. Seeking support. And practising self-care. It is also important to be patient with yourself and to celebrate small successes along the way.

·       Q: What if I fail after I start? A: It’s always helpful to remember that failure is a natural part of the learning process. So it’s important to reframe failure as an opportunity for growth and learning. Instead of viewing failure as a reflection of your abilities or your worth, try to see it as a chance to learn from mistakes and make improvements for the next attempt. It’s all part of the journey of developing ourselves.

·       Q: How can I stay motivated after I start? A: Staying motivated can be a challenge. But. It is really important to remember the reasons why you started in the first place and to celebrate small successes along the way. By setting realistic goals and deadlines in the first instance, you can help yourself to maintain motivation. When you’re finding it a bit of a struggle, seek support from friends, family, hypnotherapist or a coach or mentor.

·       Q: How long does it take to overcome the fear of starting? A: Overcoming the fear of starting is a process that can take some time and effort. Be patient and kind to yourself. You are only human after all, and all humans make mistakes. Remember to celebrate all your small successes along the way. The amount of time it takes to overcome the fear of starting can vary depending on each individual and the nature of the fear.

·       Q: What if I feel like giving up? A: Feeling like giving up is a natural part of the process. But.  remember why you started in the first place! That reason is really important to you. Keep moving forward. Make sure you’ve not given yourself unrealistic smaller goals and deadlines. Take smaller steps towards your main goal. Seeking support from friends, family, hypnotherapist or a coach or mentor can also help you to stay motivated and on track. Your cheerleader team!

·       Q: Can the fear of starting be completely eliminated? A: While it may not be possible to completely eliminate the fear of starting (remember that survival hard wiring from our evolution?), it is possible to manage and overcome it. By identifying the root cause of the fear, reframing negative thoughts, taking action, seeking support, and practicing self-care, it is possible to build confidence and momentum towards achieving one's goals.

And finally……

We now know that the fear of starting can hold us back from achieving our personal and professional goals.

It can cause us to feel stuck, anxious, discouraged and unfulfilled. However, when we implement these practical strategies, we can overcome our fear and take the needed steps towards our success and growth.

Do remember that one  effective strategy is to identify the root cause of our fear and reframe negative thoughts using positive affirmations. We can break down our goals into manageable steps and take action, no matter how small, to build momentum and confidence. Seeking support from positive and encouraging people who have our best interests at heart can give us that lift that we sometimes need. Practising self-care can also make a big difference in overcoming the fear of starting.

It is important to remember that these strategies must be applied in real-life situations for them to be effective. We can’t simply think about them for them to work. By us taking action and pushing past our fears, we can achieve our goals and experience personal growth that we want.

And, as a final note, cognitive behavioural hypnotherapy can also be a valuable source of support in overcoming the fear of starting. This therapy can help us to develop our mindset positively and shift our beliefs. This leads to increased confidence and a sense of empowerment.

So. Just remember this. The fear of starting may be challenging at first, but with the right mindset and strategies for action, it can be overcome. So come on. Let's take the first step towards our goals, one manageable step at a time.

Wishing you much health and happiness

Jan Sargent

Overcoming your Fears Hypnotherapy and Coaching in Yeovil, Taunton, Bath, Exeter and all areas of Somerset, Dorset and Devon. In fact, anywhere in the UK!

Overcoming Your Fears. So Let’s Make A Start!

Are you struggling with The Fear of Starting? Need some help to Overcome Your Fear of Starting or another Fear? Book your complimentary (FREE!) Hypnotherapy-Coaching Discovery Call to chat about The Fear of Starting with me now.

How to contact me: 

I’m Jan Sargent, Qualified Personal Coach and Certified and Registered Clinical Hypnotherapist and you can get in touch by emailing me on [email protected] or calling me on +44 (0)7770 904179.

If you’d like to find out more about me click on the link  www.fitmindhappyheartcoaching.com to be whisked away to my website.

Just give me a call or send me an email and let’s get started. 

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