Fear. Don't Fuel It. Feel It. Use It.

There is a popular clip on You Tube that that purports to show that cats are frightened of cucumbers.

Don’t worry, read on and you’ll see the evidence for yourselves. And let’s be absolutely honest, cats are good value as far as most people are concerned.

They are the ultimate click bait.

In just a few seconds they can effortlessly switch from adorable to frightened to deadly hunter and then right back to adorable again. It wouldn’t surprise me if the best ones already have an armada of agents clamouring for the phone wanting to sign them up.

But cats frightened of cucumbers.

It’s completely irrational.

Isn’t it?

Yet don’t we all react, one way or the other, to some of life’s difficulties and challenges in much the same way?

Don’t we all have our own set of cucumbers to contend with on a daily basis?

Think about it.

The cat is not under threat. Everything is good and as it should be. Calm, innocent and peaceful.

Yet the reaction is seen as being completely out of proportion to the reality of the situation.

Laugh loud and long if you? like.

But don’t we react in just the same way to day to day situations that are, in reality, just as harmless?

it's not as if we have to worry about hungry sabre toothed tigers picking us off for their breakfast as we pick berries for our own anymore.

Our lives are as safe, comfortable and cossetted as they have ever been.

Yet many of us remain up tight, daunted, intimidated and, in some cases, downright terrified of some of the things we have to do in our day to day lives.

Fears that are as irrational as that cucumber.

Which can be overcome with nothing more than an injection of self-confidence.

And yes, I know that’s easy to say.

Dealing with and looking to overcome our irrational fears are the subject of a famous and respected book by Susan Jeffers called ‘Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway’.

She admits within the book that she doesn’t have the answer to why we all seem to have so little faith and confidence in ourselves but goes onto describe how fear is a natural instinct, a healthy one that is designed to keep us out of trouble. Yet too much of that fear can also hold us back, can hinder our personal and professional growth and, in time, become negative and, in the worst case scenario, even be destructive.

Now is this natural? Or is it down to conditioning?

Do we, for example, when we see our children off to school in the mornings or, alternately, wave them a fond farewell when they move out of the home to go to University or start a new life of their own away from the parental nest extol them to, “…take some risks today, be bold, look for adventure and opportunity”?

No we don’t.

We’re more likely to tell them to be safe, to take care, to have a nice day, to keep in touch; to let them know if they ever need something-and, above all, to take care. Indeed, if Christopher Columbus was alive today, his parents would probably tell him to, “…keep away from the water”.

Talk about wrapping their imaginations in cotton wool. It’s like advising them that, as Jeffers concludes, that the world is a dangerous place and they won’t be able to handle it.

Much like the cat and that cucumber.

But you know what? We can handle it. So let’s start today.

Picture something that is coming up in your life that you are not looking forward to, you don’t want to do it, you don’t want to go and would, given even the glimmer of an opportunity, run away from, never to return.

For many people, giving a speech or presentation falls into that category. The prospect of doing so frightens the life out of them, they live in deep, dark dread of it for weeks.

And that fear ends up not only dragging them down but, more often than not, the people around them. Because it’s about perceived risk. That thing that we aren’t encouraged to seek out.

Time to change all of that. Let’s feel the fear and do it anyway. With that speech as an example although you can, of course, use the same approach for whatever your particular fear is at the moment.

Visualise yourself in that situation. See yourself responding to it well, to managing it fully and with confidence, to having exactly the end result that you wanted. See it, play it to yourself in your imagination like a movie.

Now write those things that you are achieving down.

I’m the centre of attention today. People are interested in me and what I have to say. I have prepared well. The information I have is presented clearly and gets a positive response. After I have finished I am congratulated by those in attendance and asked if I will give another presentation soon.

See it and say it. Over and over again. Until you believe it.

This sort of practice, this type of personal discipline and belief that you can bring into your life can, when adopted on a daily basis, be hugely beneficial as it starts to programme our sub conscious to work for our personal success and, in doing so, push us forward rather than hold us back.

Being fearful of some of life’s challenges is natural. But the power within us to overcome them is inherent in us all.

It’s been there all along. You just need to find it.