Father’s Day in the Mountains

This time last year I was in the mountains.

It was a different Father’s Day experience because I was away from my family, relatives, and friends, and on a different time zone.

During my early morning 5-mile walk, I couldn’t help but reflect on the positive male influences in my life. 

Without question, I was blessed to receive wisdom from my great-grandfather, who lived to age 90.  He took every opportunity to tell me stories of his grandfather who was a Benin Chief, and therefore there were expectations of me because leadership runs in my veins.  My maternal grandfather is a close adviser, who reminds me of my obligations to those in need whenever we speak. My Dad, like a psychologist, listens to you so that you arrive at your own answers.  However, my mind chose to focus on the support I had outside my family circle. As an aside, it is never lost on me, that the Chief was a slave, who helped to organize his people to buy the Plantation from their masters, but I digress. 

In particular, my thoughts first coalesced around two members of the Salvation Army band, which I played in as a child and through early teens. One was a diplomat who helped to shape my interest in travel. The other was a former minister, who continued his work of serving others.  

Captain as he was called, regularly engaged me in debates about social and political issues, which was won by the person who could support their argument with a Torah reference.  He doggedly kept me in check on academic matters and encouraged my support of social service activities. Today, I am passionate about social justice issues.

My pursuit of Criminal Justice in part was based on the early groundings. My first job after high school was providing administrative support to Judges, in a court of first instance. Looking back, it was a remarkable opportunity to learn British Common Law through osmosis. I heard the arguments made in civil law that covered so many topics. The civil cases that stand out are the property cases, custody cases, and matrimonial matters.  

I remember how nervous I was preparing for my first batch of cases for the criminal assizes in our court. My Judge made me memorize the scripts for addressing the defendant and impaneling the Jury. He taught me the nuances of drafting orders supporting his decisions. His training was immensely helpful to my unexpected four-month summer stint supporting the Chief Justice of the Court, while his support was on an accumulated extended vacation.

The Chief Justice was the Professor for the Industrial Relations Law summer class I was taking at the University’s extension program. Coincidentally, I was assigned to his court the second week of the course. Immediately it appeared to me, that I was the focus of his Socratic method, where either the first question or the most difficult question was directed to me. I had no choice but to complete my readings for class, failing which the Professor would embarrass me in class, and my boss would express his displeasure at work. Together, the judges shaped my approach to legal issues and appreciation for law.

As I wrote this post, now article, I relived the emotions I experienced last year. I am most grateful to the souls of the men in the village that shaped my world-view. 

Charity begins at home so, Happy Father’s Day to my grandfather, Dad, brothers, brothers-in-law, and to the males in your family circle. 

Remember to recognize the positive male influences in your life today.

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