Father's Day Lessons from a U.S. Senator

Back in June, I had the honor of spending a decent chunk of Father’s Day Weekend with Senator Tim Kaine (D-VA) on behalf of the American Nurses Association Political Action Committee (ANA PAC).? Yes, I am talking about THAT Senator Kaine - the man who won the popular vote in 2016 with former Secretary/Senator/1st Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton and was so close to serving as Vice President of the United States. Throughout the weekend, we chatted about healthcare policy, climate change, and the challenging political environment here and abroad.? Attendees even watched a fireside chat featuring Senator Kaine and another former Presidential nominee/Senator/Secretary, John Kerry.? The most rewarding?part of the weekend, however, was getting to know and observe the Senator away from the cameras and walking away with a few lessons that are beneficial to all of us at work and in life.

Lesson 1 - Be Authentic & Kind to Others No Matter Your Station in Life

I know that this sounds like a cliche, but it's the single most important lesson that I walked away with that weekend. I spoke to Senator Kaine at least four times throughout the weekend and I was blown away by the fact that he is as authentic and kind in person as he was on the campaign trail in 2016. He was genuinely interested in getting to know all of us and consequently won our hearts. As my boss likes to say, kindness doesn't cost anything. I'll add that kindness pays immeasurable dividends. It is no coincidence that Secretary Clinton chose the senator to be her Veep candidate. This quality has earned him a solid reputation as someone who can work with colleagues across the aisle to get things done in Congress on behalf of the American people.

Lesson 2 - Give Everyone You Meet Your Undivided Attention

As many of you have likely experienced, it is not uncommon to meet someone at a networking event whose eyes and attention are wandering around the room while they are "listening" to you speak. These are the folks who zip around a reception and are continuously scanning the room to assess who they want to meet next even before they've finished a conversation. I will attest that I never got this feeling from Senator Kaine. Each time I spoke to him, he genuinely expressed interest in my work on behalf of the nursing community as well as my life outside work. Giving everyone you meet your undivided attention is not just about respect. Actively listening to others helps you collect nuggets of information about them that could be useful in the future should you need to leverage them to achieve your business outcomes. It can also broaden your perspective of the world around you, which can make you a sharper and happier person.

Lesson 3 - Cultivate a Hobby Outside Your Work and Family

I cannot tell you how many times fellow professionals have told me that their work is their hobby. They tend to wear it like a badge of honor, but I call it toxic positivity and sad. Look, even Senator Kaine has a life outside his work in the Senate. One night, the Kaine Campaign hosted a reception and dinner at a well-known museum in Richmond. The entertainment of the night featured a band that specializes in Virginia folk music AND Senator Kaine. Throughout the evening, Senator Kaine played tunes on his harmonica while belting out ballads without a teleprompter! I also learned that weekend that the senator has authored a book, Walk, Ride, Paddle, that shares glimpses into his life through outdoor activities and adventures across Virginia. These hobbies have undoubtedly contributed to the senator's ability to connect with his constituents and win almost every political office that he has sought from City Council to Mayor to Governor to Senator. Cultivating hobbies outside work and your daily life sharpens your intellect, helps you broaden your set of transferable skills, makes you a well-rounded person, and most importantly, makes you a happier person at work and home

Lesson 4 - Learn to Meet People Where They Are

As the old saying goes: "When in Rome, do what the Romans do." I learned that Senator Kaine was born in St. Paul, Minnesota, grew up outside Kansas City, volunteered time with missionaries in Honduras, and went to law school at Harvard before moving to Virginia to be with his sweetheart, Anne Holten. Yet, he immersed himself in the local culture, people, and politics once he made the commonwealth his home. I imagine that this is also when he learned to belt out those ballads and play the harmonica. This skill has undoubtedly contributed to the senator's ability to connect with his constituents, supporters, and fellow lawmakers. My career coaches refer to this quality as the ability to meet people where they are. Successful leaders win over others and bring them along to achieve a shared vision and mission. How do they do this? They do this by adapting their interactions with others to meet them where they are. So, consider wearing a toga the next time you visit Ancient Rome!

Lesson 5 - Don't Be Afraid to Fail on Your Path to Success

Everyone wants to succeed and reach the pinnacle of success, but not everyone wants to take the risks necessary to get there. Why? It is because of their fear of failure. I'm guilty as charged! In fact, I was raised to look at failure as the worst thing that could happen to me. As a result, there have been times when I have played it safe instead of taking risks to acquire skills and achieve growth. Yes, this is precisely why I cannot fix things around the house, much to my wife's chagrin!

The most successful people have learned to embrace failure when it arrives at their doorstep and view it as an opportunity to learn and grow. In other words, they turn failures into lessons learned. The vulnerability that comes along with failure also makes you relatable to others and grateful for what you have. Gratitude is a key ingredient to happiness, even more than a pay raise or promotion. During that musical night at the museum, there was one instance when Senator Kaine forgot lyrics mid-way through a song. He paused for a few minutes, played around with the words in his head, and then continued to sing until the end when he was met with applause. This was certainly not the first time that he found himself in a vulnerable situation and bounced back. After all, he narrowly lost his 2016 Veepstakes and went on to win another term in the U.S. Senate in 2018 and is now running for his third term. Despite losing the Veepstakes, that experience helped him raise his national profile and boost his influence in the U.S. Senate. A lifetime of mistakes and failures has likely contributed to his gregarious nature, sunny disposition, and ability to relate to others.

Conclusion & Challenge

Well, there you have it! I hope that you remember these lessons as you continue on your career path and journey through life. The next time that you meet a leader in your sphere, carefully observe them and be on the lookout for those teachable moments that you can embrace and share with everyone on LinkedIn and beyond. Good Luck!