Fallacy of Control;Yeah! Let go of that...

" Why won't my child just do what they need to do, and not misbehave?"

"Why won't my partner act the way I want them too?"

"Why does my best friend act so selfish all the time?

"My boss frustrates me! He/She won't allow me to just do my work the way that I do it; it has to be their way, or the highway!"

Do you know why some of these questions come to mind, in different ways, and in your own words of course?

Well, because many of us don't realize that we are living with a Fallacy of Control. We think that if we say certain things, act a certain way people around us will just fall in line, and do what is expected. Someone is going to read this and get defensive, and that is okay. I just hope that you realize that this need to control is normal, and has been built in sort of like a defense mechanism.

Unfortunately,? like the appendix it needs to be removed from us, and this is no easy task because many of us are ruled by our EGO'S.

It's important to recognize that you cannot control someone else's thoughts, feelings, or actions. Trying to exert control over another person can lead to feelings of frustration, resentment, and disappointment for both parties involved.

Here are some steps you can take to let go of the control you think you have over someone:

• Identify the source of your need for control. Is it a fear of being hurt or rejected? Is it a desire for power or validation? Understanding the root of your control issues can help you address them more effectively.
• Focus on your own actions and reactions, rather than trying to control the other person. You have the power to control your own behaviour and how you respond to situations, so focus on what you can do to improve the situation.
• Practice acceptance and compassion. Recognize that everyone is different, and they may not always behave in ways that you want them to. Try to accept them for who they are, and show compassion and understanding when they make mistakes.
• Set boundaries. If the other person's behaviour is negatively affecting you, it's important to set clear boundaries to protect yourself. This may involve limiting your contact with them or ending the relationship altogether.
• Seek support. Letting go of control can be a difficult process, so it's important to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. Talking through your feelings and getting feedback from others can help you gain perspective and move forward in a healthy way.

Remember, letting go of control doesn't mean giving up on the relationship or the person. It simply means acknowledging that you cannot control them and focusing on what you can do to improve the situation.