The Fairytale of the Launch

Last week, the lead singer, Shane MacGowan, of one of my favorite bands, The Pogues, died. I've toasted him with a glass or two of whiskey over the past several days (which is very appropriate if you know his story) while listening to lots and lots of his music (with the Pogues and more).

And then I realized that it had been a while since I did a song parody. As I looked through the lyrics of the songs I loved I realized a few things. (1) Every song told a complex story, often mixing joy and sorry, and (2) this was going to be really hard to do.

I finally settled on what is probably their most famous song, "Fairytale of New York." (video link) It definitely has the joy and sorry all built in. And it is the holidays, after all. I played around with making it about buying teams or vendor/customer relationships, but couldn't make it work.

And then, I had the idea. I thought back to the days before a product launch when working at startups. The same waves of emotion and angst and conflict are experienced. I don't know if this will generate a toast from Shane's spirit, or if he'll just have a few more to make it all go away, but without further ado, here is "The Fairytale of the Launch."

It was the big launch eve, team

In the war room

A founder said to me, "(if we fail)won't see another one"

And then we sang some songs

Chugged more than Mountain Dew

I turned my face away

‘cause of things I knew

If it’s the lucky one

ROI 18 to 1

There’s a hopeful feeling

This year's the time we win

So happy launch day

It’s finally over

We got it just in time

To have the funding come through

We’ve made claims that are chains

We’ve still got bugs galore

When the testers came calling we didn't do what we're told

When we first set our plan for that launch we believed

The promised claims would be delivered to thee

We were cocky

We were giddy

Kings across our City

When the team finished coding

They howled out for more

The CEO was swinging

The sales reps were singing

I hid in the corner scared of our plight

The throngs of the VC crowd

Were screaming "add more AI"

And the bells were ringing out

For it’s launch day

They called us bums

They called us punks

Your service is junk

Lying there on the screen with spinning ball bright

You losers, you liars

I can’t believe you got hired

Happy Launch Day, it’s past It will be the last

The throngs of the VC crowd

Were screaming "add more AI"

And the bells were ringing out

For it’s launch day

We could have been missed the scorn

Become a unicorn

But our dream fell flat

When we failed at bat

Hope we can try again

Act less insane

Make promises we can keep

And dream of riches

The throngs of the VC teams

Were screaming "add more AI"

And the bells were ringing out

For it’s launch day

Happy Holidays, all, and RIP Shane MacGowan.

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