Failures and Successes

As we approach the end of the year and I [read: Virginija (don’t worry, inside joke)] start preparing my Year in Review, I carefully reflect how incredibly happy and blessed I have been for these opportunities, but also realise upon which failures these successes stand on.

We’ll see over the next few days (and have seen throughout the year of course) all of us showcasing our achievements of the year or decade while we hide all our defeats. For those of us watching from the outside, these may seem intimidating, inspiring or both at the same time, but,

I wanted to share with you some of my failures over the past ten years:

• It was my life’s dream at the age of 12 to study at the University of Amsterdam or the University of Leiden. I applied to Amsterdam for my Masters and was rejected.
• I applied for 7 PhD positions, all of which I was rejected for.
• I have failed all of my economics exams, except for one.
• I did my drivers theory exam five times and the practical exam four times over 10 years.

But these stories don’t just end there. It didn’t for me, and I don’t think for you either. Perhaps you didn’t get what you wanted or maybe you didn’t make any progress towards your goals but only in reflection can you see what your failures can lead to.

For me, despite the disappointments and set goals, I looked at all my options, all the provided suggestions, and all possibilities that were available and took chances in some unknown fields that lead to the following:

• It was bitter that the University of Amsterdam rejected me based on my English language skills (I did A-levels, studied Law in England, Communications at an English-language college, and was editor of law and communications publications, what more can I possibly do?) I applied to the College of Europe because it was my ex his life’s dream to study there. I subsequently went to the College of Europe on a full scholarship and specialised in information warfare and strategic narratives.
• My sole goal in 2017 was to apply for EUI and other PhD programmes at renown universities. I have always wanted to teach and be a professor focusing on research and fostering young talent. I was rejected for all of them. I then was approached by Constantin and together we built Sunium, where I specialised in systems thinking and complexity studies, and subsequently now teach courses to youth leaders in local communities and young professionals in a variety of different sectors.
• Yes, I failed all my economics exams but one, despite excellent note taking. I pulled through because my grades pretty much solely relied on dedicated study to get top marks for homework, coursework and in-class participation.

• I did get my drivers license in the end, just don’t get into a car with me (unless you’re driving!).

I believe that 2020 will be wonderful. You may have seen successes this year, and you may have seen failures. You could even not have any idea what’s going on right now in your life and you’re trying to make sense of it all. But I have always believed that you need to keep your eyes open to all the opportunities around you, and have the courage to take paths unforeseen. These will allow you to grow in ways unimaginable and I, and many of your other friends, will stand by you as you go along your way.

This quote by J.P. Richter gives us fair warning: “When one door closes another always opens, but we usually look so long, so intently and so sorrowfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened.”.

You got this. Let’s see how 2020 will look for us ??