Failures = Self Discovery!

Hi Everyone!

I wanted to share one of my life experiences with you all, of course got some time to break this out on Sunday!

It is the story of my self-potential discovery. I was an introvert person right beginning from my early childhood, or even I will say introvert square. Once I hid beneath my bed when some relatives comes to meet us, you can relate.

Being #clueless is alright, it's just a perception from a time based lens. I was too, until I discovered the answer for, 'Who am I?'

I had this feeling from my early childhood that I will be a big person someday, didn't know although 'How to become one?'. But as they say one must have a dream and must have a belief, I had a dream but not a belief by then.

So what happens next is - The definition of becoming big during my Early childhood was to earn a lot of money and fame, and the reason behind the same was 'Our families frequent financial crunch', it was justifiable right, when we see from the perspective of following 'Catalyzed dreams' as it was easy to dream that as well, like if I say,'okay no problem if our family is having a financial problem, I will become a big person one day and earn a lot of money', it was very easy to dream right!

Now what happened as a result was, I started wasting a lot of time doing wishful thinking rather that breaking it out to a real world relevance. When I used to see any fellow student singing on a stage in my early school, I use to feel that I can try that too, because of the instant appreciation they received from other students. If someone was good at sport then I would like to try that as well. I never had my own strategy or true passion towards anything, I just had a dream to become big, and I understood at that time that I have to do something to achieve my dream. But due to lack of self-discipline and hand-holding, I kept losing my consistency over my dreams, until the life's game strategy became decisive from true skills rather than duplicating. I thought at first that, it is impossible to develop some competitive skills now to stay in line of achieving my dreams. And that has a rationale too...

During the timeline, I failed more consistently as compared to actually experiencing consistent success. I won't say failure didn't bother me. It can be suicidal when you're highly ambitious and keep losing your discipline with repetitive failures. I just started fearing from more failures before starting anything. And that has made me dormant, like an inert atom, completely non-reactive until external force hits with right intensity.

My mom is my biggest inspiration, she always stays happy no matter what and keep taking care of our family without asking anything in return. I mean it is very big a life's sacrifice that has led me to a self comparison, and that led me to shout, 'Abhimanyu, what the f*** you're doing with your life?' My mom has acted as a right intensity catalyst to regain my fighting spirit when I needed it the most.

I have been practicing seclusion since last 6 months, operating my startup from my village in Rajasthan. Like living with very primitive resources of life, except tools needed to fulfill my work responsibilities. And while doing so, I felt a connection to a blank canvas where all of my thoughts/ideas were relevant and practical to real world. And that 'One cannot achieve true self-discovery until there's discipline, determination, sacrifice, pain, failures, competition, rivalry, etc'.

I just feel relieved to tell this not to get likes, loves or claps but just to tell that life's always fair to those who not gives up in a fight.

Drop me an Email if you're feeling down spirited and couldn't been able to get a direction. Do not hesitate, I am not a motivational speaker which will charge you to motivate you but can share my life experiences from suicidal depression to Highest positivism 24*7 from last 1000 days.

[email protected]

Regards

Abhimanyu Singh Rathore

Founder & CEO - Solar Study