Failure to Thrive: It’s Not Just for Kids

When you hear the phrase “Failure to Thrive,” what comes to mind?

For most people, it’s likely a medical term used to describe children who aren’t growing or developing as expected. Paediatricians track their height, weight, and overall health, intervening when something is wrong to help ensure that every child reaches their potential.

But what if we took that concept and applied it to mothers - particularly working mothers?

We often don’t think of mothers, especially those trying to balance work, parenting, and life, in terms of “thriving.” The expectation placed on modern mothers is to do it all, without complaint, and without missing a beat. But the reality is, so many of us are in survival mode, and no one is stepping in to check on us.

“We’re doing everything we can, yet we often feel like we’re failing to thrive.”

The Pressure to Do It All

Society has created a narrative around motherhood that says we need to be Supermom.

We’re supposed to excel in our careers, manage a household, raise children who are happy and well-adjusted, and somehow find time for self-care and relationships. The reality is, the expectation is impossible.

Working mothers, in particular, are navigating an incredibly tightrope between professional responsibilities and home life. There’s a constant struggle to meet deadlines at work while also being present for your child’s soccer game, all while staying on top of laundry, meals, and everything in between.

But what happens when the weight of all these expectations becomes too much?

The pressure to do it all leaves many mothers exhausted, stressed, and overwhelmed. We’re often left feeling like we’re not enough—like we’re failing, even though we’re giving everything we’ve got.

“No one ensures we’re not burning out, crumbling under the pressure of ‘doing it all.’”

The Silent Struggle

While children have paediatricians monitoring their growth and well-being, working mothers have no such check-in. There’s no doctor telling us to slow down, no professional ensuring we’re taking care of ourselves or acknowledging the emotional and mental toll this balancing act takes.

And yet, just like children who need proper nourishment and care to thrive, so do mothers.

Without the right support systems in place, it’s no wonder so many of us are running on empty. We push ourselves to meet the never-ending demands of work and family, often at the expense of our own well-being.

This silent struggle is happening in homes across the world.

And the worst part?

We’re often left believing that this is simply the price of being a mother. The stress, the guilt, the constant worry - it’s easy to feel like it’s all part of the package.

But it doesn’t have to be.

Recognising the Need to Thrive

The first step toward breaking free from this cycle is acknowledging that we deserve to thrive, too. Just as we make sure our children are healthy, growing, and developing, we need to start paying attention to our own well-being.

“Thriving shouldn’t just be for our kids—it’s for us, too.”

Mothers are the backbone of families and communities, yet so often, we put ourselves last. We get so caught up in making sure everyone else is taken care of that we forget to care for ourselves.

The result?

Burnout, resentment, and a loss of self.

But what if we redefined what it means to thrive as a working mother? What if thriving wasn’t about being perfect or doing it all, but about finding balance, joy, and fulfilment in the everyday moments?

Letting Go of Perfection

One of the biggest barriers to thriving as a working mother is the myth of perfection.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that we have to have it all together, all the time. But here’s the truth: perfection is not only unrealistic, it’s unsustainable.

“We need to let go of perfection and redefine what success looks like.”

Success as a working mother doesn’t mean doing everything flawlessly. It means doing what matters most. It means setting boundaries, asking for help when we need it, and prioritising ourselves.

It’s about progress, not perfection.

By letting go of the unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves, we can create space for more joy, more presence, and more peace in our lives.

The Importance of Support

While it’s crucial to shift our mindset around what it means to thrive, it’s equally important to recognise that we can’t do it alone. Just like children need support from parents, teachers, and caregivers to grow, working mothers need their own support systems.

Yet so many of us feel isolated, like we’re the only ones struggling. We may not talk about it openly, but the truth is, so many mothers are feeling the same way. It’s time to break the silence and start supporting one another in real, meaningful ways.

“Mothers deserve support, not judgment. We thrive when we lift each other up, not when we try to go it alone.”

This can look like finding a community of other working mothers who understand the challenges we face, or simply asking our partners, families, or employers for the support we need to thrive.

Thriving Isn’t a Luxury - It’s a Necessity

Here’s the thing: thriving isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity.

When mothers thrive, families thrive.

When we take care of ourselves, we show up better for our children, our partners, and our work. We can’t pour from an empty cup, and yet so many of us are trying to do just that.

It’s time to start prioritising our well-being, not just for our sake, but for the sake of our families and communities. We need to create a new narrative around working motherhood—one that honours our needs, our desires, and our worth.

A Personal Story: Rediscovering Myself

I know firsthand how easy it is to lose yourself in the hustle of motherhood.

When my twins were little, I barely remember anything from those early years. I was so stressed, so overwhelmed, so not myself, that it’s lucky I took a lot of photos to remember things - otherwise, those precious memories might have been lost.

“I was in survival mode for so long that nothing seemed to stick.”

But over time, I realised that I didn’t want to live that way. I didn’t want to look back in 10 years and see a blur of stress and exhaustion. I wanted to reclaim my joy, my balance, and my sense of self. And that’s exactly what I did.

I’m sharing this because I don’t want that for you either. You deserve to thrive - not just survive.

So, Are You Ready to Thrive?

The time to start thriving is now. Don’t wait for someone else to tell you it’s okay. Give yourself permission to step off the treadmill of unrealistic expectations and start living a life that feels fulfilling, joyful, and balanced.

“Thriving isn’t just for our kids—it’s for us, too.”

PS: If this resonates with you, let’s chat about how you can start thriving today. You deserve it! ??