Failure is an event, not a person
Recently, a colleague contacted me about my recent post on LinkedIn about dealing with rejection after a job interview - https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/how-deal-rejection-after-job-interview-jonathan-walmsley/ .She told me that she thought the article contained some great advice, and that the best advice she had ever received after being unsuccessful after an interview for a job she wanted was that ‘failure is an event; not a person’.
This is a profound statement, which of course I had to research. It was first made by American Zig Ziglar, an author and motivational speaker. He is the author of the book ‘See you at the Top’, which was rejected by publishers 39 times before it was published in 1975. He was clearly persistent, and followed his own advice; otherwise that book would never have been published. When I heard those words, I realised that they can completely change the perception we have of something. ‘Failing’ at something like a job application is something that happens TO you, not something that defines you as a person.
And the greatest weapon we have in terms of our ability to bounce back from a disappointment is to choose one thought over another. That is the essence of resilience, one of the most important strengths you need to succeed in the legal profession.
So, rather than take it personally, and assign it as a character trait (‘I am such a failure’), turn it around to ‘what can I learn from this thing that happened to me’. As I said in the earlier post:
- Seek feedback
- Act on that feedback
- Stay in touch
- Set goals
- Seek advice and assistance