Exploring the Power of Kindness

In a world where social media and news feeds are filled with stories of greed, violence, divisiveness and anger, it can be easy to think that things just aren’t going our way. When considering global warming, extinction rates, starvation and political strife, sometimes it can be easier to disengage, to find solace in the sofa, binge watching and a pint of ice cream. And as a Gen X’er, it’s easy to find the memes that say ‘meh’ in the face of it all.

However, this weekend, I spent several hours reviewing scholarship applications for Kappa Alpha Theta Foundation , scoring against a rubric related to leadership, service and scholarship, and diving into personal essays about how these women are committed to positive change in the world. What struck me most was when asked about their values in action, nearly every applicant called out kindness. Whether defined through empathy, acts of good work, commitment to others’ needs, or simply offering an ear when needed, the value of kindness was universal.

What does kindness mean? The dictionary would state it is the quality or state of being friendly, generous and considerate. More than ‘nice,’ kindness can be seen as a moral standard or value to do what is right and think about the impact we have—through our words and actions—on the world around us. I appreciate the work of Kindness Is Everything , which notes that kindness involves choice. We make a decision in terms of who we interact with, how we engage, and what we offer in that interaction.

Several years ago, our SupplySide leadership team had some executive coaching from Hal and Baadrea Bagley of Elevate2 Lead . While we all explored topics together, including how to have ‘Fierce Conversations,’ we also had some great individual discussions with personalized recommendations. One of the most powerful for me was ‘Braving the Wilderness’ by Brene Brown; I’ve since enjoyed multiple books and podcasts with her insights, including ‘Dare to Lead’, in which she states: ‘Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.’ What does this mean? In our interactions, we must be willing to have the tough conversations, sharing the truth, offering the direct feedback—and being willing to be vulnerable and stay in the moment—instead of offering half truths because it’s easier for us.

Further, kindness is not something that is turned on and off between our personal and professional lives; as businesses look for ways to improve culture and employee engagement, acts of kindness—more than in-house lunches or a pool table—are meaningful at a personal level. In writing for the Harvard Business Review , Andrew Swinland notes that kindness at work begins with being kind to ourselves, including managing your workload, doing your job, offering honest feedback, and providing authentic praise. A few other ways that leaders can bring kindness to the workplace, according to Kristen Ghergich in a blog for Quill ? Start emails with a compliment; go out of your way to show new employees the ropes; or point out someone’s strengths at the next meeting. (There are several more examples to consider in the full post.)

When thinking about kindness in business, there is still a balance to strike. In his piece for INSEAD Knowledge , Nadav Klein addresses how to specifically define and practice kindness in business; he argues there is a benefit to adhering to social norms and expectations, as well as the potential for diminishing returns. Ensuring people are treated fairly supports goodwill and builds personal reputation, while maintaining personal boundaries and allowing everyone to achieve their business goals.

Ultimately, this isn’t an easy path. TBH, I still struggle with the concept of kindness as a foundational value, as it feels rather … well, smarmy. And have you ever heard someone talk about their value of unkindness? But I'm remaining mindful that when engaging with others, it’s a choice to take an extra beat, think about my approach, and be prepared to be clear and vulnerable. More importantly, it’s a choice to be kind to myself, practicing self-care and finding ways to maximize my potential not in spite of my flaws but because they make me unique.