The experiential F word.... "I'm Fine"

When I was working in Uganda as part of my masters program, I was living with seven other students from Canada, all in some form of psychology graduate program. We worked in different sites with different organizations during the day but often ate dinner together in the evening. Either I would cook something for everyone with a collection of ingredients that seemed familiar from the market, or we would eat out. We all were foodies of sorts and loved to discuss our favorite meals and treats. To our chagrin, in the small town of Masaka, Uganda, culinary delights were hard to find... In a community where survival was often a cornerstone of each day, I guess exotic and tasty food options were not a priority. It became expected that when my fellow classmates would ask me about my meal, my response would be a deep sigh.. and then "it's fine.."

It was the truth, the food was acceptable. It was not bad in flavour (not that it really had any..) and it was energy for my body... but it was often dry and bland and heavy on the simple carbs. The locals loved it and it fueled them after a longs days work, but to a spoiled foodie like myself, "it's fine" was all I could muster. (A reflection on my privilege is a whole other conversation...)

Anyway, The point I am trying to make is that when I ask my colleagues or clients how they are doing.. I often get a response including a sigh, and then "I'm fine" or even better "I'm surviving"... And I feel sad, and I wonder how we got to this place? Where did being "fine" become enough? Do we strive to be not good, but not too bad either? Or perhaps, we feel that we are not allowed or not safe to be what we really are, feel how we really feel? Are we OK with our life status being equal with bland food?

In her book "Zombies to Zealots" Darelyn Mitsch talks about the need for a reawakening in the workplace, a re-connection with our human spirit. She states "Although many understand what their spirit is - that part of their personality that animates them and holds the rest of their personhood together - most are not clear about what role their spirit plays in their workplace performance." If this is true, we have disconnected from our spirit once walking through the office door, then it makes sense that we are all just fine... the thing that makes us alive, has not been invited to the party.

My challenge to you then is to call back your spirit so to speak, to observe yourself at work and do a check in. How are you, really? When do you feel awake? When are you just fine..? When do you feel your spirit being stepped on? And when people around you ask how you are, do you know? Do you look inward and really touch base with yourself? Do you ever do that?

Mitsch offers some questions to ponder while exploring this reawakening:

• What if we really are born here on Earth to play an extraordinary game called Life?
• What if our workplaces are actually the playing field for our soul's evolution?

Now this may sound a bit fluffy and perhaps I am not speaking your language, but the message is basic: if you want to feel alive at work, you need to bring your full self, spirit and all. And this my friends, is the missing piece of the puzzle, imagine a workplace where everyone saw a clear path between their life's work and their evolution as a human? How much more might we care about our work and each other?

I admit, I am guilty of the "I'm fine" response, sometimes I leave my spirit at the door. However, when I am brave enough to bring my full self, my experience is much much richer (like a decadent chocolate lava cake..yum) and I feel a deeper sense of why I spend my energy this way, what value I can offer, and I feel more connected to those around me. Do you want to be fine? Or do you want something more?

Pass the salt ;)