"Expensive Divorce Lawyer" Doesn't Mean What You Think It Means

Brendan Lyle and Kristin Brice address "3 Pieces of Divorce Advice You Shouldn't Follow" at the Huffington Post.

I agree with two of their positions, but one of their arguments could unnecessarily cost you a fortune.

Their first piece of advice you shouldn't follow? "You can do everything yourself."

Web MD-ing a divorce will never end well. Becoming well-versed in legal terms through online articles does not make you suited to handle your own divorce. ...

Absolutely right. If there are children, if there are any assets or debts, or if the marriage lasted virtually any length of time, then doing it yourself is horribly unwise. And far too many people who insist on going it alone seem to think that, "If there's a problem, I can just get a lawyer later to fix it."

That is usually not true at all ... quite the opposite. If you want to modify alimony, child support, child custody, or visitation down the road, you will need to show a substantial change of circumstances justifying a modification. This can be difficult to do, and it cannot be based on facts you knew at the time you were winging your divorce.

And, depending on the agreement you may have signed to end the divorce action, you may end giving up rights you didn't even know you had. Courts will usually uphold agreements; there is a very narrow set of circumstances under which they'll set one aside. But know this. One argument to set aside that will fail 100%, every time? "I should never have signed this agreement, and I wouldn't have done it now that I look back at it."

If you're doing it yourself with the idea that a family lawyer can fix it later, then you're acting like you have a safety net. And for a lot of issues you're dead wrong, but you won't find out until it's too late.

That ties in with another part of the post, where Lyle and Brice say you shouldn't follow another piece of advice, "Get it over with."

Divorce is not a pleasant time and can push people towards rushing through the process to avoid the pain. Though a quick divorce by no means is a wrong divorce, it should not be filled with rushed decisions in order to put things in the past. ...

Again, great point. It's understandable that you want to get it over with and move forward as soon as you can. But don't let haste drive your decisions.

Family lawyers will often be asked to review an old mediated settlement agreement or consent final judgment that is currently devastating the client or hurting his ability to provide for or spend time with his children. Guess the most common answer to the lawyer's question, "Why did you decide to sign this agreement?"

"I just wanted to get it over with and move on ..."

You know what makes it harder to move on? Making a rash decision, which you might not be able to fix later, and which continues to hurt you long after the divorce is finalized.

But I part ways with their discussion of another piece of advice you shouldn't follow, "Don't waste money on a lawyer."

Though attaining an expensive lawyer may seem out of reach, it could save you money in the long run. A less expensive lawyer will often be less efficient when handling your case, taking longer to reach a settlement. Higher rates shouldn't scare you when searching for the right attorney, as these lawyers have more experience and therefore are more knowledgeable. ...

You can waste a lot of money if you follow this approach. Let me tell you why.

First, a lawyer's hourly rate is a shaky metric for determining how good the lawyer is at family law.

Take those lawyers who do not practice family and divorce law exclusively. Say they also handle auto accident lawsuits, or small business disputes, or drawing up wills. Maybe they are very good with those cases, but they don't spend much time in front of the family law judges or studying family law. In that case, you're paying for a lawyer's rate when handling a different kind of litigation -- not for his familiarity and efficiency with family law, where he may not be nearly as experienced.

Also, a family lawyer at a larger firm might charge a higher rate in part because of the office location, greater overhead, and need to pay for more (and more expensive) support staff. There, again, you may end up paying a higher rate than you would if that same lawyer was at a different law firm otherwise.

Yes, the very best family lawyers in town will often be the most expensive family lawyers in town. But more expensive, alone, does not tell you how good your divorce lawyer is. 

Another reason you can waste money by simply choosing the more expensive lawyer? "Less expensive will often be less efficient" is often wrong. You will find some expensive lawyers who pride themselves on being bulldogs -- which means they fight over everything, require far more court hearings (which cost you not for just the hearing but also for prep time), and never resolve simple aspects of your divorce quickly or cheaply. Some of their cases will drag on longer -- and at those higher rates! -- simply because they want to contest everything rather than focusing on the core of your case and moving efficiently to settlement or trial.

Sure, there are a lot of cheap lawyers who are inefficient, but many expensive ones are as well. If getting the case done efficiently is important to you -- and it should be -- then hourly rate should not be the deciding factor. Instead, ask about the lawyer's experience in family law and approach to litigation. A good lawyer can tell you why you need to fight sometimes and why you must ensure a complete picture of the financial and personal aspects of your case. But a good lawyer for you also understands the maxim, "Never fight a battle in which you gain nothing by winning," and won't force you to pay for fighting over trifles.

If you're facing a divorce, get a lawyer. "Saving" the money by doing it yourself could be one of the most expensive decisions you could make. But make sure you know better than thinking "the higher the lawyer's hourly rate, the better that lawyer is in family law." That type of thinking could also cost you more than you can imagine.