The expectation of Integrity!

Most have the intention to live with integrity, some at ? measures and many only when they want something! Welcome to Human beings, and until we each raise the bar individually, then nothing will change. In life, there are enablers, blockers, and immobilizers.

To live with integrity takes courage, humility, honesty self-forgiveness, compassion, and self-love. An action is required to live within a space of integrity, own your shit in the moment and catch yourself when you have acted out of integrity, or even addressing conversations that were not aligned with your highest truth. This cultivates a high expectation of living and is vital to creating an extraordinary life of success.

 This taking action with these conversations to seek clarity and express with integrity may shift a relationship into a deeper one, create a pause, or the relationship may end. There is a level of risk when other parties are speaking a different language, that may lead to blame and a story that has drama attached.

There are change-makers, thought leaders breaking through old ideas and more and more people living their Soul truths and there has been for many years an explosion in the spiritual community of consciousness. The question is, are we living with integrity behind closed doors, in ALL aspects of our lives?

Meaning, to live and act in integrity is willing and comfortable for others to see behind the scenes of our lives, actions, texts, the choices we make and not the surface BS parts we show to others, to 'look good'. Is there a fa?ade that we are holding up, so others cannot see beneath the Veil? This is not about disrespecting privacy, this comes back to self, to see where in our lives we can improve.

Are we really being REAL with ourselves?

How can we be successful, when behind closed doors, we are not living with integrity.

Do you wish to be successful?

Imagine feeling so complete that there is no need for anything outside of yourself. It is so times that you are overflowing with love, joy, confidence, happiness that other’s wish to be around you, they are inspired by you and there is an overflowing energy of giving. To live with integrity take effort and the more you begin to see, the uglier it may look!

Energy is energy and when energy is shared freely, wise advice, intimate connection, or in a powerful conversation of the naked truth being exposed, the raw and real truth that the other cannot see……I believe that as Human beings, we are not giving back in the way that we CAN. When another makes a stand for you, shows you what you cannot see ( your blind spot), understand that they have your back, and they are creating a new possibility to communicate from. As we each grow and evolve, there comes a time to walk away from others that are no longer aligned with the new playing field that you have chosen to play within.

There is much taking, receiving and no real honour of what has been received. We have become the consumer mentality, of giving much for free and to the fellow coaches out there, there comes a time to shift a relationship from friend to paying client.

There is a mentality of lack, much free feeding from unconsciousness and it is time to RAISE the Bar.

To raise the bar in our worth, set new boundaries and learning when to give advice and when to simply hold space in silence. They are willing to get uncomfortable, by making a financial commitment to themselves, on the value of the advice and radical internal shifts. Know that as you shift, others may not shift with you and they go another way, that is okay too.

To fellow coaches, this happens a lot. Friends, seek our advice, yet is there any offer of… Hey, that was powerful, that conversation hits hard and I made massive shifts… and a un-even exchange of energy. I will write a review on your business page, and that was valuable…referring others to your services.

The question is, How valuable is getting your life back?

Is there a price tag, when it radically shifts your MINDSET?

It is actually SELF, that is not raising the bar! and a reflection of the inner work of lack mentality and worthlessness.

I was the friend who was being more of a friend to stand by friends with integrity and offer advice and years of wisdom, in a conversation, that was infused with much of what I would present in a powerful coaching session. As an INSPIRER, this is a challenge to switch it off.

I saw, that I was handing it over for FREE and for the first time felt out of integrity with myself and my own inner worth. I also had not set new boundaries, to invite the other into a powerful coaching session, and then hold back and more so be present as a friend, with no advice.

I chose last year to raise that bar, and here is was offering powerful distinctions for FREE! Fuck, it was powerful, I love playing in the arena of powerful coaching, and it is EPIC to see others shift, to witness it and that is what friend’s do. Then it hit me, I’d sold myself short.

I had also stroked my EGO. Haaaaa, yup it will hide at all cost and here I am owning how it also came out to play.

I wanted to be there as a friend and yet I was also offering my services for free. I seemed to be always expanding on learnings, spiritual awareness when we hung out together, sharing what was going on in my life and feeling drained after the interactions. Feeling I was there when it was needed, for advice, support and I also loved this soul like a sister. The soul that you can roll around laughing for hours, for no reason.

The question is:

When do we draw that line in the sand?

What does that look like?

When to shift from being a friend and offering to move into a powerful coaching session?

This was my learning to get really clear on what my own boundaries were, how I have undersold myself and not taken the conversation to a new possibility or make the choice to simply hold space, give no advice and embrace the coaching hat!

Personally, I saw this was my own expectations that would bite me on the ass.

Personally, when another soul has inspired and shifted my life, I will honour them, either with an exchange of unexpected $$, a card of gratitude, a lunch out to say thank you and always a write up and professional recommendation and HOW they shifted with total transparency and honesty, this takes courage on their part as it mean’s being seen. It does not have to involve money, word of mouth is powerful and sharing one’s vulnerability is what INSPIRES others to take action.

So, I get it why this rarely happens, unless they are asked. I have seen and learned from life, that the ONLY EXPECTATION is within our own level of INTEGRITY.

What others do, is none of our business. And, we can each choose to walk away with the integrity of our own truth and share this so others may begin to see an evolved way. To have an open conversation, without the child-like reactions, hold space with presence and hear what is being said, minus the Drama. This is vital for 2018.

All we can BE is walk our own TRUTH, and communicate with clarity that we know at the time, ownership of our truth at the time and be willing to forgive in a heartbeat. To each do the inner work (daily habits) that happens behind closed doors with self.

Integrity begins and ends with SELF.

So, this brings me to the inner investigation, is there an expectation of integrity.

Yes, the expectation is to SELF and owning our integrity. To LIVE my own life with integrity, values and then choose wisely and communicate that which is out of alignment with love and honesty as it happens. This takes courage as a friendship or partnership may end... BTW a new beginning for more aligned souls.. as we change, so too do the people we surround ourselves with. To be with integrity is:

·     To be willing to EXPRESS the truth

·     To be willing, to be honest

·     To be willing to be vulnerable

·     To be willing to be humble

·     To be willing to give reverence

·     To be willing to seek to understand self and others

·     To live with Integrity, in each breath and moment.

Yes, these are the ways you choose to live in the world and will be different for us all.

This ownership of worth may be seen as too confident, too big for your shoes and all I will say if you chose to jump into the Ocean of bigger fish….then go for it, it is TIME!

Are you willing to swim, be the small fish and keep stepping up and challenge yourself to expand and open the doorway for expanding into whom you came here to be as a Soul?

I know now that once I tasted this, there was no other way to be. Yes, be willing to jump in and swim, know that I am not getting out, jump in with me and start swimming as to be without integrity begins with self and I will STAND for SELF and those that are willing to make that commitment to self.

May this inspire your own truth, to be honoured.

De-tach from drama and LIVE your Dharma,

Zoe Bell